The Worst Horror Movies Ever

[sthrnwriter]

Preyer commented on maybe starting a worst list in the favorite horror movies thread. Thanks for the suggestion, preyer. So, here it is.

What horror movies do you think really lacked something or just plain sucked altogether?

I watched part of a movie the other night called Pinata: Survival Island. Even though I only watched half of it, this movie wasn't all that appealing to me. The script seemed forced, not natural. The special effects were pretty good though.

[GonnaBeFamous]

Preyer commented on maybe starting a worst list in the favorite horror movies thread. Thanks for the suggestion, preyer. So, here it is.

What horror movies do you think really lacked something or just plain sucked altogether?

I watched part of a movie the other night called Pinata: Survival Island. Even though I only watched half of it, this movie wasn't all that appealing to me. The script seemed forced, not natural. The special effects were pretty good though.

LOL I saw that too. I didn't findit that appealing because it was too Special effects for me. I like the good ole fashioned michael myers or regular human killing horrors. I feel very passionate about this, considering I've written my own horror.

I saw Bloody Murder 2 the other day too. That was like a Jason remmake excet the girls were all hot and it was gorier and wasn't scary at all due to a bad director.

What about the blood camp or whatever the hell its called with the transexual killer on the lose? Thats more comical then scary.

[sthrnwriter]

Another 'comical' movie is I was a Teenage Zombie (I think that's the name). It's a independent film. The movie was hilarious dispite the acting and the script being terrible.

[Perks]

'Deadly Friend' - mid '80s. Completely rank as a horror film, but Anne Ramsey does get decapitated by a basketball. That was great.

[triceretops]

Well, Bride of the Monster, produced and directed by the worst in the business, Ed Wood Jr.

The T.V. movie of the week, Raptor Island, was the biggest load of muffed up FX crap I've ever seen.

The Legend of Bogey Creek.

King Kong, the remake with Jessica Lang. Why in the hell didn't they just let the Japanese do it with one of their suits, eh?

[GonnaBeFamous]

The movie was hilarious dispite the acting and the script being terrible.

Thats why its so funny. I think its supposed to be funny anyways. Gotta love the 80's. :)

[MacAllister]

Anaconda.

And the one about the pirhanas.

*groan* They were both so awful they were funny.

[BlueTexas]

Dog Soldiers. I think it was a recent UK release--we got it through NetFlix. It should have been called "How to shoot dogs, act badly, believe the pretty liar, trick the viewer, and STILL get killed by werewolves."

[loquax]

Dog soldiers is awesome!

Nevermind. Try Jeepers Creepers. Ouch.

[Richard]

I feel sorry for Ed Wood, the worst director ever because a couple of guys said so in their book. There are so many, many worse directors out there.

For example, Uwe Boll, chief diarrhoea sufferer on House of the Dead.

[MacAllister]

Oh, Oh!!!

Night of the Comet (http://www.imdb.com/title/tt0087799/) was seriously dreadful--but strangely watchable, anyway...

[MitchJ]

Speaking of Ed Wood, I think it's ironic that a movie about the "worst director", one of Tim Burton's better efforts, garnered two Oscar nominations.

And I guess the list wouldn't be complete without Plan 9 from Outer Space.

Also, Robot Monster (not one of Wood's) is one of the worst. That's the one where the monster is a guy in a gorilla suit with a space helmet and two antenna--ack!

[AprilBoo]

The T.V. movie of the week, Raptor Island, was the biggest load of muffed up FX crap I've ever seen.




So I guess you didn't see Hammerhead on SciFi. Consider yourself lucky. It was unwatchable.

[elisadasilva]

good lord, how come no one said the worst horror movie of all time yet? Without doubt it is Revenge Of The Blood Farmers, from the 80's. I never laughed so hard in all my life.

[Fractured_Chaos]

Dog Soldiers. I think it was a recent UK release--we got it through NetFlix. It should have been called "How to shoot dogs, act badly, believe the pretty liar, trick the viewer, and STILL get killed by werewolves."


*hides* :o





I liked that movie.

[Fractured_Chaos]

Oh, Oh!!!

Night of the Comet (http://www.imdb.com/title/tt0087799/) was seriously dreadful--but strangely watchable, anyway...

That kinda qualifies as a good bad movie. It's bad, yes. But fun and cheesey to watch. Especially with the sound off, and several semi-intoxicated college students sitting around making up the dialogue as they go along. :ROFL:

There are some movies out there that are bad, but still fun to watch because they're bad. Anything done by Ed Wood would be an example (or Jackie Chan movies...I admit that is my guilty pleasure).

Then there are some that are just horrid. Like House of 1000 Corpses. Or Vampire's Kiss (http://www.imdb.com/title/tt0098577/).

[scfirenice]

attack of the killer tomatoes....come on. TOMATOES?

[loquax]

True; the really bad horror films turn out to be the most fun. One of the most recent examples is Freddy vs Jason. Unadulterated rubbish, but you'll be hard pressed to find a better film to watch with friends. Whilst drunk.

If you're fifteen.

[Fractured_Chaos]

True; the really bad horror films turn out to be the most fun. One of the most recent examples is Freddy vs Jason. Unadulterated rubbish, but you'll be hard pressed to find a better film to watch with friends. Whilst drunk.

If you're fifteen.

Or wanting to feel like you're fifteen :wag:

[MadScientistMatt]

I had been very disappointed by Attack of the Killer Tomatoes, too.

The weird thing about Ed Wood Jr. is the way he could combine the unthinkably terrible with some elements that were actually pretty good. For example, Plan Nine From Outer Space has excellent pacing, clear storytelling, and manages to maintain an interesting sense of mystery. Then he combines his genuine storytelling talent with impossibly inane dialog, ridiculously bad special effects, switching actors in mid-movie, and the worst disregard for visual continuity I've ever seen.

Sometimes I have to wonder: Would Plan Nine be as much fun to watch if it was uniformly bad, rather than mixing the good in with the absurdly horrid?

[GonnaBeFamous]

My favorite one as a kid was killer clowns from outer space. Now its more like a comedy. Great 80's film. :)

[triceretops]

Okay, there was one about a bunch of High Schoolers who were at a resort. The male jocks were taking powerful steroids and some leeches sucked their blood and became giants, attacking all the students. Don't remember the name. Great idea, if you think about it. But these big silicone leeches scooting across the floor was just too much.

Tri

[preyer]

'jolly roger: massacre at cutter's cove.' unintentionally awful, which is why is was so funny. sadly, this can't be said of 'hollow's end,' which was just too bad to be funny. i'm holding off on 'frankenfish.'

i actually enjoyed most of 'jeepers creepers' and the first half of 'house of 1000 corpses.' :)

man, i've see too many horror movies. they all blend together in one cheesy scream and splash of blood, lol.

i can't say 'the exorcist II' was that bad because i didn't make it through the whole thing. maybe it really got good the moment i turned it off? yeah, right.

the all-time worst for me, though, was *drum roll, please*-- 'mansquito,' a sci-fi network puke-a-thon. it's actually on rental shelves under the name 'mosquito man.' *renter beware*, heh heh.

[GonnaBeFamous]

Amityville horror the original. Now that just sucks.

Ghoulies sequels

Exorcist 2

Gremlins sequels

Freddy Vs Jason

[sthrnwriter]

I didn't care fore House of 1000 Corpses either. It was just too much like Texas Chainsaw Massacre to me. And to think the sequel is about to hit theaters. I wonder if The Devil's Rejects is just as bad.

[Richard]

Return of the Killer Tomatoes is an excellent film. The first is pretty bad though.

[Rhush]

Is Devil's Rejects just as bad? OH YES. All Zombie's movies are really bad versions of the TX Chainsaw Massacre. You always leave the theater going "I feel gross now...and I want my $5 back."

[preyer]

ah, can't be the worst, rhush.

i've got one of those blockbuster movie passes where i pay a monthly fee and essentially make them a library. tonight's fare, because i've seen prit near everything else i think my wife will sit through with me, will be 'frankenfish,' if i get around to watching it. it's pretty bad when the dorks at blockbuster make fun of your movie choice (makes me want to say, 'yeah, well, at least i've had sex with a woman. a real woman.').

[Rhush]

Ha. Yeah...well, I gotta ask, Frankenfish...that must be based on a true story, right?

[Nicholas S.H.J.M Woodhouse]

Ok, joining late on the thread - but hey, thats life right now.

There was a horror film made in the 70s, 3 parts, with Peter Cushing in there as the narrator who was telling someone the stories at a party.
The second story (I think it was 2nd) was about a 'whistler' who could set things on fire with his pursed lips. Que med-close up zooms on lips and cuts to birds of fire on the grass. Amazing stuff.

Oh and Cube. Made me feel like no matter how bad I get, there will always be a market for bad writing.

[loquax]

Cube is in my top-ten best movies. It has so many layers of meaning, and one can have philosophical arguments for hours over it (search the web - you'll find loads of confusing discussions between philosophy majors). The writing is ingenious; the whole concept of the Cube as a metaphor for life opens up such a huge can of worms that it can leave you dazed. The bad dialogue does little to hide what the movie actually means.

[aspiringwriter]

Probably the worst horror movie would be Rawhead Rex!!! Came out in the late 1980's..... really cheesy!!!

[preyer]

didn't get a chance to watch it, so i've still got hope that 'frankenfish' will win the noble prize for ***-kickery on every level, sweep the oscars, and scare the wallpaper off the walls. hopefully it's so scary that unborn children will be afraid to come out of their wombs for a fifty mile radius and i'll start getting calls from catholic priests wanting to excorcise the daemons from my DVD player. if nothing else, hopefully it's so scary it drives away the neighbour's damn cats from my yard.

realistically, hopefully it's as 'good' as 'anaconda'. wanting it to be another 'lake placid' (?) is asking for too much.

ya know, i enjoyed 'house of a 1000 corpses''s beginning with the clown. weird to see ron howard's brother in these terrible little horror movies. talk about extremes. the same guy was is truly one of the dumbest horror movies ever made, a slasher based on the video game 'house of the dead,' the movie called the same for some unexplainable reason.

NZ, you said something more right than you may realize. when it comes to horror, there *is* a market for bad movies. you probably know this, but it came as a surprise to me years ago when i asked my friend who owned a video rental store at the time what her biggest rentals were. porn, of course, was what paid the bills, then B-movies. now, this ain't so true when it comes to places like blockbuster who's got two banks of 'million dollar baby' to compete with, but if you look closely at the shelves, it's still pretty interesting to note the kinds of movies they've got.

beyond the mainstream movies which obviously gets the bulk of the shelf space, at least in a temporary sense, there are lots and lots and lots of 'new releases' (if you cound 'mr. 3000' as a new release like the bastards at blockbuster) that you've never heard of, and terrible horror movies have its fair share of that. as an aside, they should have an indie section, a sundance section, and they're about two titles away from having an 'alternative lifestyle' section, i.e. movies for gay folk. i'm tellin' ya, were i gay, i'd be writing cheesy gay horror and selling scripts left and right. wait a minute, i think that's been done. i seem to remember a movie i considered taking out called 'slugs,' if i recall correctly, until i saw a commercial for it on the satellite, 'just turn to channel whatever,' which happened to be an all gay channel. the next time i saw the commercial, i paid a bit more attention to it because i didn't understand why it would be on a gay channel, and sure enough, given a second glance, damn, it sure seemed kinda gay to me, lol. what better avenue to show off a lot of naked gay dudes, though, without it being porn than a slasher-quality type of movie? it's a strange world out there.

i can see pitching it now:

'okay, there's, like, this skinny young vampire who's gay, right, and he's hungry. but, instead of sucking on the neck, well, you can see where this is going, right? anyway, he's in a small dusty town in texas being chased by a catholic priest. that part kinda writes itself as the priest, who are all secretly gay anyway, starts to be attracted to the gay vampire dude. why texas, mr. producer? well, because you know what they say about texas, don't you? yeah, that, too, but the other thing applies in this case. anyway, there're a lot of fashion statements and killing gay couples having sex in the park. well, one night he attacks a gay werewolf and then becomes a vampire/werewolf thing, and in the full moon he gets really beefy, gay abs and everything. it's a metaphor there. brilliant? why, thank you, but basically it's a character study. he eventually dies tragically in a vat ful of gay man-eating piranhas. why, sure, you can write me a check right now.' jeez, one could probably make a career out of writing this stuff. i think i'll stick with 'house of the dead' for what it's worth, though, lol.

[aspiringwriter]

I liked House of 1000 Corpses...haven't seen Devil's Rejects but I want to... :)

What about "Frankenhooker"?...It too was pretty bad...

[preyer]

'frankenhooker' starred that guy from 're-animator,' a classic horror flick. i only saw parts of 'FH' on cinemax when i was a kid, but i vividly remember the prostitutes in the hotel room scene. weird, very weird, but watchable like a train wreck. the worst movie? nah, i think it was supposed to be campy or sarcastic or something. the scientist was trying to build the perfect woman, as i recall. sort of reminds me of 'the man with two brains' with steve martin.

[preyer]

you know what, 'frankenfish' really wasn't that bad. if you liked 'anaconda' and 'lake placic,' you'll probably like 'frankenfish,' whose title really is just not right. but, of course, there was another gay reference, this time the chich biologist coming onto the chick bayou resident. why are so many horror movies doing all these gay references? i don't get it.

[triceretops]

Probably because they want to depart from the "norm" characterizations that we've seen in our classics and standard format movies--Boy meets girl, boy loses girl--boy gets girl in the end. Now wait a damn minute--I mean he finally disovers and wins her heart over at the end of the movie. But that other reference wouldn't suprise me either. I don't know, maybe it's lazy script writers who want to inject a little shock value--but you don't know if their implications are meant to entice with a little taboo, or to demean such a lifestyle. Heck, I can never figure it out.

I recently used a 6ft 5-in female futuristic cop (captain) who chases my straight guy all over hell's half acre. This female brute has a female captain lover who rides with her. I develope a touching love story between these two as they ruthlessly hunt down my protag and his party. I left the lesbian culture and lifestyle out of the book completely, but this forbidden association between them works on such a good level that I do not think that I paint any negative (gay) preachments or declarations, one way or the other. Besides, they die in each other's arm via execution at the story's end, so it is quite a departure. But talk about straddling a fence and trying to get away with it.

Remember the first onscreen kiss between two gals? I forget which sitcom pulled this one, but soon after every producer, director, and writer were riding that train because it was chick or trendy. How many "who shot J.R?" remakes have we seen? All because of the Nielsen rating buzz that went along with them.

What's next? Cross-dressing aliens? Oh, I forgot about Rocky Horror Picture Show.

Doh!

Tri

[Ivonia]

Hmm, interesting topic. I guess one of the worst horror movies I've seen recently (within a year or so that is) is an ultra B movie called Vampires vs. Zombies.

http://www.imdb.com/title/tt0408309/combined

First of all, for all the bashing I'm going to do, I have to give them credit for having made the film at all, as most of you probably don't know that like 95% of scripts out there will never, ever get made.

The opening scene did have potential to be scary, but then it just stopped making sense after that. For a movie with a title like that, you'd also think that they'd have more zombies, but most of the time the zombies are just there so that gore and what not can be shown. It does have a plotline, but it's really confusing to follow. There's some, um, girl on girl action in this movie too, but I kind of wanted to be scared lol, not watch a light porn movie.



Another B horror movie that my brother forced me to watch was called S.I.C.K. (Serial Insane Clown Killer). I thought it was going to be an "It" clone (which did scare the heck out of me, as I saw it when I was little and clowns were scary).

http://www.imdb.com/title/tt0367817/combined

This one too, had some potential, but the acting is pretty bad, and I wasn't finding myself too scared until the end (and even then, not much, as I started to criticize all the other things that didn't make sense in the movie. I wasn't sure whether to be scared or confused).

As bad as it was though, it had an interesting twist at the end, but I won't spoil it for you hehe.

[preyer]

'vampire assassins' ranks right up there for me. just watched this turkey tonight (except for a few minutes in the middle of the action where i dozed off).

a black guy hunts vampires using his martial arts skillz and big damn knives, and is bitten by the villian so he's a vampire himself. gee, sound like anything starring, oh, i don't know, wesley snipes?

there is literally nothing positive i can say other than it was modestly entertaining in its awfulness. B quality? keep going. C? i wish. is there anything lower than an F?

it couldn't even maintain sound quality, switching from what almost looked like video while on certain people, but with a boom, to the villian, in the same scene, which appeared to be shot on film *without* a boom and all sorts of background noise you don't hear when showing the other guys.

this thing made 'the ghouls' seem like shakespeare in comparison.

i've seen people having epileptic fits perform better stunt work than the lame-o's in VA.

i'm not making this up, but when the villian is revealed to be a vampire in the middle of the police station (in this case probably a room rented out from the community centre), the vampire starts a killin', guns are drawn, and where does the action naturally switch abruptly to? why, a toilet paper warehouse, of course. seriously, no joke, we went from the captain's office literally to the next scene being a warehouse full of boxes of toilet paper.

my favourite 'what the fuuu...?' happens in the logic. none of the vampire even flinched at being shot at point blank range, yet are completely susceptible to karate chops. niiice.

okay, i take one thing back: while in the police office, the captain asks his officer under arrest for harrassing the villian who, well, nevermind, to prove the guy's a vampire. so, as he's being held from behind, the MC mumbles a prayer to turn the cup of water into holy water then kicks the cup onto the villian. thought that was okay.

[Starlightmntn]

The biggest downer for me was probably Poltergeist III. The original, of course, was a classic. The second was a reasonable effort for a sequel. The third squarely hit skid row, however. It is almost physically painful to watch. Hey, way to kill good thing guys.

[preyer]

wasn't 'poltergeist' supposed to be another 'cursed' production? i know the cute little girl in it died tragically.

[Starlightmntn]

Yes, Poltergeist does have the tag "cursed" attached to it, but as the little psychic lady (forgive me, I don't know her name) said in an interview, BS. Heather O'Rourke who played the little girl did die of an infection. That was certainly tragic. The older sister in the original film was murdered by her boyfriend. Again, tragic, but that happened well after the movie was released and related more to not so spectacular decisions in dating. Finally, the old preacher in the second movie died after filming, but apparently he was terminally ill to begin with.

[James @rmstrong]

Preyer commented on maybe starting a worst list in the favorite horror movies thread. Thanks for the suggestion, preyer. So, here it is.

What horror movies do you think really lacked something or just plain sucked altogether?

I watched part of a movie the other night called Pinata: Survival Island. Even though I only watched half of it, this movie wasn't all that appealing to me. The script seemed forced, not natural. The special effects were pretty good though.

------------------------------------------------------------------------

Favorite Horror Movies: (no particular order)

1. Halloween
2. Texas Chainsaw Massacre (original)
3. Dawn of the Dead (original)
4. Howling V: The Rebirth
5. American Warewolf in London
6. The Thing
7. The Exorcist
8. Alien
9. Aliens
10.I Spit On Your Grave

Least Favorite Horror Movies: (same criteria)

1. The Devil's Rejects
2. Alien: Reserection
3. The Grudge
4. Boogeyman
5. The Exorcist II
6. Halloween III
7. My Bloody Valentine
8. April Fool's Day
9. The Boogens
10.Tremors 2

Anyone see "Wrong Turn"? I actually liked that movie. The pacing was the key I think.

[preyer]

i saw it and remember it as being pretty good, but the details elude me.

right, maybe 'cursed production' was the wrong way of putting it as much as saying the people in it seemed cursed afterwards. true, maybe BS, but they said the same thing of carter and his associates and a few people after they opened tut's tomb. arrange the facts in a certain way and it certainly seems worse than what really happened.

[louisgodwin]

I recently saw what is probably one of the worst movies of all time. The fourth installment of The Crow series. I think they must have spent 90% of their budget on big-name actors, and only had 10% left to spend on everything else. It's called The Crow: Wicked Prayer. Starring David Boreanaz, Eddie Furlong, Tara Reid and Dennis Hopper. Straight to video. Badly directed. Sucky special effects. There were fights scenes which had all the quality choreography of Walker: Texas Ranger. It has some funny moments, though. Dennis Hopper wearing a mink coat and speaking in Rap-Slang really cracked me up. I loved the original Crow and have been saddened by its lesser sequels. Salvation was okay, though. I kinda liked the murder-mystery spin it had.

[preyer]

don't you hate it when they run the franchise into the ground? 'amityville horror,' 'poltergeist,' 'exorcist,' 'friday the thirteenth,' 'nightmare on elm street,' 'hellraiser,' 'house,' 'phantasm,' 'highlander' (oops, sci-fi)... the list goes on. if there's a quick buck to be squeezed out, they'll do it. i contend that maintaining the quality of writing and production levels, not only should the studios make more money, but also extend the life of the franchise. we're not talking about cheesy B-movies (well, you know what i mean...) to begin with, though, so it shouldn't be relegated to that, imo, and be expected to draw in the same kind of audience.

i mean, honestly, how difficult would it be to follow up on 'poltergeist'? what made 'aliens' so brilliant was it expanded on what made 'alien' such a masterpiece, not necessarily following the formula, yet recognizing the core elements.

my opinion, there's no reason why tim burton's version of batman should not still be in production were care taken with the story and there have been a master plan behind the franchise beyond cheap cash money grabs. you know you're screwed when the controversies behind the movie involve nipples on the batsuit and who's got the bigger cod-piece.

for as bad as the 'crow IV' certainly is, there'll probably be a part V, lol. and, honestly, what are the odds you'll watch it, too, hoping to see a ray of hope? you'd think that since the number of people going to see movies are dwindling for lo these last two years (this year may be another), someone somewhere would get on the ball and make a decent movie. 'the crow', though, being straight to video, knows it's not a great movie and were it in the theatres, the advertising would have killed its profit margin b/c word-of-mouth would have sunk it immediately (not to mention it being part four, and who the hell saw the middle two enough to see four in a theatre?).

we watched a movie the other night which my wife commented, 'this is so retarded.' 'yeah,' i said, 'but it's entertaining.' it was called 'dead and breakfast,' what AICN (which harry knowles gushes over every awful movies made) declared, 'the american version of 'shaun of the dead.'' hardly! i think that movie was intentionally bad for its own sake, which i respect in a weird way. as in a lot of really terrible horror movies, there's sometimes an admittance in the dialogue, and i quote, 'this is like a bad horror movie!'

agreed. glad the writer admits that, because we sure as hell don't need to be told otherwise, lol. it begs the question, though, if the writer realizes it's bad, why don't they do themselves a favour and write something decent and probably make more money that way and go for a sequel? i guess that on a dollar for dollar basis, horror movies are the way to go after you bottom-line it out.

there must be a lot of us who just really like bad horror movies. the faster you go straight to video the sooner we're going to snatch it up. that's why i'll get around to adding my own awful horror-comedy script to the pile. and people will see it because i know for a fact there are tons of suckers like me out there, lol.

[Carole]

I think there are some movies that should have been left alone. The Crow is one of those. It's one of my all time favorite movies...we still have the first VHS tape of it...and after the original, they become silly in my opinion. There are some movies that most definitely can spawn good solid sequels, but it looks like every time there is a really good film, someone somewhere decides there's more cash to be had even if it is straight to video!

[triceretops]

Ah, the Chucky movies. Just saw Bride of Chucky the other night and wondered what new dimension they were trying to tap into with that one. Horror/comedy?
It was just damn funny and I guess they were reaching for that element with those one-liners. "We're dolls, you idiot." "There ain't no replacement for a good hunk of wood." Doh!

Tri

[preyer]

not that it was ever a favourite, but is there an end to the 'puppetmaster' series? well, at least it didn't have far to fall, imo. what galls me are actually good movies with horrid sequels. how could i have forgotten 'holloween'?

sure, there are probably hundreds of reasons why this stuff happens, but it's still frustrating.

rest assured that *my* horror script, if made, would be high on this list. picture this: a dude walks into a run-down gas station bathroom and sees a star around a hole in the wall. 'hey, a glory hole!' he says and does what is only natural for certain people to do. he doesn't know a flesh-eating zombie is on the other side. come on now, that's just funny. like when the chick zombie says to her husband before the mass zombie rampage, 'hold on, dear, let me put my face on,' and so she slaps on the flesh of catherine zeta-jones (or someone, it being set in l.a., the sky's the limit). brilliant? i'm going to say 'nah.' entertaining? well, it makes me laugh. obviously i'm easy to please, huh.

[Carole]

not that it was ever a favourite, but is there an end to the 'puppetmaster' series? well, at least it didn't have far to fall, imo. what galls me are actually good movies with horrid sequels. how could i have forgotten 'holloween'?

sure, there are probably hundreds of reasons why this stuff happens, but it's still frustrating.

rest assured that *my* horror script, if made, would be high on this list. picture this: a dude walks into a run-down gas station bathroom and sees a star around a hole in the wall. 'hey, a glory hole!' he says and does what is only natural for certain people to do. he doesn't know a flesh-eating zombie is on the other side. come on now, that's just funny. like when the chick zombie says to her husband before the mass zombie rampage, 'hold on, dear, let me put my face on,' and so she slaps on the flesh of catherine zeta-jones (or someone, it being set in l.a., the sky's the limit). brilliant? i'm going to say 'nah.' entertaining? well, it makes me laugh. obviously i'm easy to please, huh.
That sounds funny! Reminds me of Shaun (Shawn, Sean....however it was spelled) of the Dead!

[preyer]

thanks, C, but mine's got lots of gratuitous sex in it. why? because i miss that in bad horror movies. this PG-13 stuff doesn't cut it most of the time, lol. besides, zombies are just a small part of it, i've got an entire 'league of evil' (though i'll have to come up with a better name than something i ripped-off from 'the simpsons') trying to take over the world, starting with l.a.. that's just a funny place, too many easy gags to pass up, like when they impale all the heads of stars that just irk me, such as michael moore who continues to speak after dead and tara reid whose head just bounces around because there's no brain there to hold it steady on the stake. just stupid humour, no sophistication. my heroine is a french nun with tatooes and wears sexy lingerie under her dress. silly, goofy junk. kung fu mummies. skeleton guards who can't see or hear for a damn, and with no way to yell, they can't raise an alarm-- just poor planning on the league's part. the grizzled old man who knows everything, his eye patch moves from side to side in alternating scenes (brilliant, eh? okay, maybe not). i forget all the dumb ideas; one that pops to mind is the generic bad guy that's a compilation of jason, darth vader, freddy, etc., whose wicked glove has a razor sharp knife, spoon, fork and screwdriver ala freddy's glove. it's okay because it's a parody and you can get away with ripping-off stuff easier. :) gotta put some scary stuff in there, too, though. think naked gun/monty python junk.

[emeraldcite]

Worst:

Redneck Zombies by Troma


Sidenote:

I think that House of 1000 Corpses was excellent. The filmmaking was fresh, the imagery startling, and the juxtaposition of the killers' beliefs to the brutality was interesting. I think someone mentioned it being plotless, but in fact it is no more plotness than any other horror movie that involves teens becoming lost and chased around by mad killers (really, what's the plot in the Friday the 13ths, the Nightmare series, or the Halloween films?). I think that Rob Zombie creates an interesting mythology and bases his film around these kids who get stuck in it. The characters were well-acted and memorable. What more can you ask for in a horror movie?

[preyer]

'the thing below.' tagline: fear is rising. starring... some actors. my wife thought she recognized one from a soap she used to watch.

seems a radioactive alien, mind-reading, telepathic (in that it's able to project hallucinations into people's head), shape-shifting octopus thing (no, not making any of this up, i'm afraid) is bent on killing everyone in its path. doesn't matter why, it's not explained anyway. it's entertaining in its utter awfulness. it does, however, feature some of the worst f/x i've ever seen. i mean, seriously, you have to see these to believe 'em. i've seen better production values on public access where daylight is considered a special effect.

it's one of those movies where when something technical is about to be said, someone else says, 'i don't want to hear that crap, just tell me what it means!' because the writer hasn't a blue clue in a shoe what he's talking about anyway and needs a way to cover his bad, lazy writing.

this is completely, totally, utterly, unsanely, bizarrely and ridiculously bad, which makes it worth watching. if there was one single thing about this movie that made a lick of sense, i'd tell you. there is a woman who shows off her giant fake boobs, though, so there's that.

[preyer]

this could be a different category: movies that suck that could have been cool. my first pick would be 'the ice queen.' could have been scary, but it was just dumb and boring as hell.

[LieselGarmach]

I don't normally watch horror films.

On May 30, 1980, though, I saw what had to be one of the worst ever. The Howling. It was so idiotic I wanted to leave but the guy I was with wouldn't go.

What a waste of film, an evening, and a guy.

[sthrnwriter]

Just a thought.

I know alot of the good horror movies are being re-made. Of the movies you've posted here, would any of see the movie(s) again if it was re-made?

[preyer]

i can't remember all the movies here, but, yeah, probably, were they to have decent production values and a serious re-write. then again, they wouldn't really be the same movie, lol.

[sthrnwriter]

lol thats true but at least the second time around, it would be worth the money to see it.

[sthrnwriter]

I'm not sure if this one has been mentioned yet or not, I didn't see it anywhere, but I watch a movie tonight that was horrible. It was called Do you Wanna Know a Secret. It had Joe Lawerence and Chad Allen in it. This movie was like I Know What you did Last Summer meets Urban Legends in a way. The script and plot were terrible. I knew who the killer was before half the movie was over. They made it way too easy. I mean when you see all the other people killed except for one, it's pretty easy to figure out who it is.

[Uncletrunx]

Anaconda.

And the one about the pirhanas.

*groan* They were both so awful they were funny.
I lost two hours of my life and £5 to Anaconda.

I resent the fact that I can't have them back.