THE WEEKEND PROGRESS REPORT 2005

[Yeshanu]

Okay. I have removed all the valuables from my house, and called the fire department. To wit: I have only done 200 or so words on ATTS. Not good.

However, I did get my two submissions for SOS into Mac a WHOLE DAY before the deadline. She sent them on to Jenna, so they've passed the first round, at least.

I also wrote nine pages in my notebooks (I had to start a new one, finally!), mostly non-fic, including one of the above submissions.

Found another anthology to submit to, and have started writing that piece, and the deadline isn't even until November 1! (What's going on here?)

Goals for the coming week:

1) 2500 words on ATTS. No excuses. No fire extinguishers. Just words.

2) Finish rough draft of piece for next anthology.

3) Post some of the drivel I've been writing in SYW for shredding by the masses.

4) Find a beta reader for #2, get rough draft to them.

5) Find another market to work on for next week.

That's it for now. Having a "real" job in a factory has increased my motivation factor to earn a living from my writing by 100,000%. Being bored has its advantages,too. By the time lunchtime arrives, I actually want to write.

[batyler65]

RUTH

Bud says to tell you he will write a poem for you if you don't get busy and show some progress. (And we really don't want that, now, do we?)

You've got your goals and I doubt seriously that I could motivate you more than your factory job.

Get cracking! I want to hear progress!

And I DON'T want to hear Bud's poetic attempts.

[Jaycinth]

Hello, I was directed here by others who thought I could benefit. I'm Jaycinth and I've published 'jack'!

I've been writing since forever. I thought I finished a novel 20 years ago but I got one rejection ( the novel sucked so bad that--) and I hid it.

It became found 6 years ago, I threw out half and the rest has been evolving into my current mess of manuscripts. (One of which collected the 77th rejection slip just yesterday.)

So now I have two finished novels in need of 'unfriendly' editing. ( my friends and family, the ones who don't look at me like I've lost my mind, read it and focus on things like a character's name, the length of a chapter, and anything they think they can comment on and not hurt my feelings. It isn't helpful, and neither is telling me to 'give up because I have a good job don't I? I'm sure someone knows the type!) I also have two drafts; novels 3 & 4, partially written, and three short horror stories, and one unfinished SF short.

I try to write every day, but sometimes life interferes. Sometimes I watch football Sometimes I fall asleep at the computer.

But I DID get 2,000 words done this weekend. It may not seem like a lot, But I'm happier. I'd like to get at least 5k words done a week on draft work and another 5,000 words a week on the novel people here have been editing and poking at for me. So that's where I am now.

Hello!

[Kida Adelyne]

Hola! Guess what?! *jumps up and down*

I just got my first ever acceptance! *still jumping up and down* Jenna is gonna use my poem in the anthology! *squeel*

Oi, I really need to calm down *still jumping up and down*
Or maybe do a jig. I am going to be published!!!!

*goes jumping off*

-Ally:Jump:

[Kitahoshi]

Hola! Guess what?! *jumps up and down*

I just got my first ever acceptance! *still jumping up and down* Jenna is gonna use my poem in the anthology! *squeel*

Oi, I really need to calm down *still jumping up and down*
Or maybe do a jig. I am going to be published!!!!

*goes jumping off*

-Ally:Jump:

Go ahead, dance. Just wear this. *hands her a harem costume*

http://www.absolutewrite.com/forums/images/smilies/emoticonbanana.gifhttp://www.absolutewrite.com/forums/images/smilies/smilepopcorn.gif

[allenparker]

Ally,

Dance naked on the kitchen table!!!!!!! Show the world, or house as this may be, how great you are!


remember, friends don't let friends drink and dress.....


Congrats .... dancing with you. Don't foret to post this on the I Got Yes thread.

Allen

[Yeshanu]

Allen,

The big, bad, Mom character is telling Ally that if she dances naked on the table in front of you...

Well, you get the picture. I hope.

((to lazy to sign out of mums account))

*hits kita* Not in public! You said I only had to wear it for you.

*hits mom* I'll just do it a school, where you can't see me.

*thinks*

That may make my friends go blind, but oh well.

Uh, I think I need to talk to the principal...

Bud says to tell you he will write a poem for you if you don't get busy and show some progress. (And we really don't want that, now, do we?)


Right, Barb. Progress coming up. Lots and lots and lots of progress. Hopefully enough to keep Bud away from the computer for a long, long, time. (Ally's asking why Bud didn't enter the AW Awful Poetry contest...)

[triceretops]

All right now, kids, idle it down to a dull roar and put your clothes back on! This minute! We've got company......

Oh, cograts, Kida, we love you!

Welcome, Karen, this is where we post our progress on the weekends and lie, or exagerate, or tell the truth about how we've done during the week. It helps to motivate. Some of us get whipped, burned and tasered--and some of us like that.....don't ask. So feel free to enter your numbers fri, sat, or sun of this following week. Sometimes we have little skits that we perform when a theme is decided on. Welcome aboard. Now get busy with Howie and Pellie, and you know what I'm talkin' about.

Kida, you can dance nekid now. I'll protect you.

Tri

[Kida Adelyne]

Welcome Jaycinth!:welcome: Have fun in the mad-house!

-Ally

[Unique]

this is where we post our progress on the weekends and lie, or exagerate,

Tri

Is that what you've been doing all this time, Tri ?!? And to think I fell for it.:faint:

Congrats Ally! That's terrific.

Uh, I think I should have asked you for purple prose monkey writing lessons last week. It seems that it's becoming somewhat of a fad these days and I'm only slightly lavender. >wink<

[batyler65]

JAYCINTH
Welcome to the nuthouse! I'm glad to see you here.

Those are some pretty stiff goals! We'll all be happy to prod you along in your progress. The general call for reports goes out every Friday and I try to make responses before noon on Monday. Smiley faces for effort, lashes for sluggish behavior.
Our theme song appears to be "Hotel California" although *glares in the general direction of Mac* I'm not quite sure who selected it.

Good luck, and I'll be looking for you on Friday (and I'm pretty well versed in all the hiding spots around here. ;))

Barb

[batyler65]

Uh, I think I should have asked you for purple prose monkey writing lessons last week. It seems that it's becoming somewhat of a fad these days and I'm only slightly lavender. >wink<

Um... Is that why you haven't posted a report?

No progress, no lashes, my little Masochist!

I'm expecting a double report this weekend. With footnotes. And sidebars.

The Whipmistress

[batyler65]

SMILEY PARTY FOR ALLY
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WOOHOO, GIRL!

Big
CONGRATULATIONS on that first acceptance.

What say you go fishing for the second one?

Banana Dance!!!!!!!!!!!!!
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[triceretops]

"Is that what you've been doing all this time, Tri ?!? And to think I fell for it.:faint: "

Actually, Unique, I don't lie or exagerate about my numbers. They are dead on. Now my stories are fabrications, and I enjoy those. Just wait for my slack time when this one is done. It takes me a month to revise and I don't get ANY writing (new words) done. Then my back shall taste the lash. Ohhhhhhh.

Tri

[Unique]

I'm teasing you Tri. You truly amaze me and I wonder sometimes. But perhaps you don't have a little 'crazymaker' underfoot all day, everyday as I do.


And that, Oh Merciful Taser-wielding Taskmisstress, is why I had nothing to report - Last week was so terribly, revoltingly, disgusting and frustrating that I'm trying to forget that I even lived through it. Being an analog model, rather than digital, it takes me longer to erase bad input from the hard drive. However, so far this week has progressed much better and I may even have something more intelligent to say than my usual, 'Duh.'

(and if you wonder what I meant by all that - let's just say I'm thankful I'm not up on charges for dastardly deeds and abuse done on not-so-innocent progeny)

[Yeshanu]

Unique,

Both you and your progeny will probably survive the crazy period alive, though if my family is any indication, you'll probably be a little warped. Ten years or more from now, you'll look back on this time and say, "Writing material!" :)

[Unique]

Unique,

Both you and your progeny will probably survive the crazy period alive, though if my family is any indication, you'll probably be a little warped. Ten years or more from now, you'll look back on this time and say, "Writing material!" :)

True. But I was warped to begin with; I'm sore afraid of what I'll be in ten years. Of course, in ten years I'll be so old I probably won't remember much anyway.

(psst...I'll trade you one purple prose monkey for a hotwired Matchbox car fanatic)

[Kitahoshi]

All right now, kids, idle it down to a dull roar and put your clothes back on! This minute! We've got company......

Oh, cograts, Kida, we love you!

...

Kida, you can dance nekid now. I'll protect you.

Tri

... Heh eheh. ^.^() Ummm... ee? *runs from the big bad mom character and fails due to her blindness*

[Birol]

::chanting::

Ally got an acceptance, Ally got an acceptance.

:PartySmil:PartySmil

[batyler65]

Friday, September 23, 2005

EVERYBODY LINE UP!

Yes, it's that time again. Time to step forward and admit what you've really been doing all week.

I have had a full week. The rewrite is once again on the back burner as the "money making" writing work takes a front seat. I've been dreaming up bonus issue proposals (for the educational gig), putting together a second draft January issue and working on the outline for February. In other writing news, I did add a new humor prompt to this forum, wrote a children's puzzle, sent out a batch of humorous greeting cards to my favorite company... um, I think that is it... oh, no. I lied. I also started work on a couple of new queries, and I have some old queries that need remarketed. That's on my list for next week. Hmm... The artistic side of me is working on picture puzzles for a new book I'd like to finish during the next hiatus in my contract, and the editor of my humor column sent me an e-mail to make sure I'm still on board for next year. :)

My brother and his band stopped by my house Wednesday on their way to play the Midpoint Music Festival in Cincinnati. I fed them and they jammed. They wrote a song while they were here which is currently titled "Barb's Kitchen". They also made a guest appearance at a local bar and played three tunes and I of course, tagged along. It's official, I'm a groupie.

Tonight, we go to crew the cow balloon at the Adam Matthews Balloon Festival. Lots of hard work. For those of you who haven't been around since last year, the cow is something like the 5th largest hot air balloon in the world. It takes a football field to lay it out for inflation. There are some pictures of the cow included in the gallery here:
http://homepage.mac.com/adambakes/PhotoAlbum18.html

Anyhow, tonight is the glow and we have lots of work to square away before we go there to work. I have only agreed to work tonight's glow and not EVERY event this weekend. Unfortunately, my children, bless 'em, really want to work every event possible. IF I AM LATE ON MONDAY, IT IS BECAUSE WE WERE INDULGENT PARENTS AND BROKE DOWN AND CREWED ALL WEEKEND. IN THAT EVENT, I WILL BE MOO-VING SLOWLY.

Okay, gang, your turn. Lay it on me. Tell me great things. Lie if you must, but be creative. At least make me smile.

Oh, and did I mention I had the whip reconditioned?

Barb

[scfirenice]

Whip reconditioned??? That does not sound good nor bode well. Anyone know of a nice safe hidey hole around here?

[Unique]

Whip reconditioned??? That does not sound good nor bode well. Anyone know of a nice safe hidey hole around here?


((inside the flying cow - she'll never look in here - and ssh, be vewy, vewy kwiet.))

[Birol]

[I'm not positive, but I'm pretty certain the glow involves fire. Should I tell them or not?]

[Kida Adelyne]

(maybe she salvaged what was left of the tazer and hooked it up to the whip? *is very scared*)

[Kitahoshi]

((Why are we whispering? *appears beside the huddled group* I've already done 1600 words for the week on my sole day off from school work and other things. :P ))

[gina]

Where do I begin? For those that might have missed my post (http://absolutewrite.com/forums/showthread.php?t=19430) over on the goals and accomplishments board I formally announced my new writing gig over at Media Village today. My blog went live this morning, and I've made my little introduction and jumped right in there. My review blog is keeping me busy. Only one show I review left to premiere, so I'm getting into the flow of my new responsibilities and schedule Things are going well.

This week's word count is 9910. I checked and double checked that because that is at least double what I usually write. About 2000 words of that is fiction writing, so I'm well on my way to my 5,000 fiction word monthly goal as well. I just need 1700 words this week to meet that goal.

I'm just really busy, and I'm getting a lot done. Part of my day is spent promoting my review blog since that is where most of my traffic is going to come and hopefully hop onto over Media Village.

I'm off to write now! More later.

[triceretops]

I'm a Friday reporter so I better come in here under the wire. Last week 107,000--this week 119,000, for 12,000. Coming to the end now, getting a little bit confusing. Have added a sub-plot twist that I'm not sure I need, but it works. Also submitting various email queries, partials, and fulls on the first book, and trying to track them accurately. Tons of format changes on these subs--seems that every house wants something different, so it takes a lot time for these taylor-made subs. Hoping to end this thing by next week.

Tri

[Unique]

:Hail: Hail, Taskmistress Barb. Queen of the Whip:whip: , Sweet Giver of Lashes, Electricity, and other devilish delights to those who say, 'Duh'.

I have been practicing stringing together adverbs, adjectives, and alliteration all in one sentence. I have been informed by our precious purple prose monkies that this is the correct format for filling fine pages with purple prose.

I have also been keeping up with the homeschooling chores and this week, I have actually done some work for hire. >Yiippee< Meat on the Menu!

Other than that - I have been slacking. You know, the usual.

[ChunkyC]

Wrote my column. Other than that, I've been preoccupied with the SOS Anthology effort, so no other new writing, unless you count e-mails to various media and stuff.

[scfirenice]

Hi Barb,

I wrote 3500 words in book three. Got accepted into the SOS effort and have been pounding the pavement and keyboard to support the book. Everyone!!! PLEASE EMAIL every major news network and show you can think of!
www.oprah.com
www.drphil.com
www.cnn.com
http://www.cnn.com/CNN/Programs/nancy.grace/
www.today@nbc.com

Thanks in advance!!!

[Kida Adelyne]

Ummmm... can't remember what I did this week. I wrote more poems. Not sure how many. I have to write 3 and 2 one half poems by wednesday or someday like that for my poetry assignment. :faint: I am very tired and very out of it. A good lashing might do me some good to get me out of this poetry-only rut I'm in.

-Ally

[maestrowork]

HAPPY BIRTHDAY BARB!!!!

[triceretops]

HAPPY BIRTHDAY BARB--

:Jump: :partyguy: :partyguy: :Cake: :heart: :kiss:

Tri

[storygirl]

Hmm. Well, I wish I hadn't done so much last week. It makes me look bad this week. Ok, as you know, I'm kind of stuck until I get through this back log of material that I have. And yes, I did some rewriting/revising this week, but I sort of cheated. I only did it in one of my more recent MSs, so it was a lot easier than tackeling the older, mistake ridden ones. Anyway, on this easy edit of the week, I got through 27,549 words.

I know...not much, espeicially when I only did the easy one. I realize I will probably be punished. Oh, maybe this will make it so I'm not punished quite as harsh: I sent out two requested samples to two different agents thanks to the queries I sent out the other week.

Well, that, pathetcially, is all I have to report. Now, I'll just back away slowly... singing HAPPY BIRTHDAY TO YOU...HAPPY BIRTHDAY TO YOU...HAPPY BIRTHDAY WONDERFUL, KIND, MERCIFUL BARB...HAPPY BIRTHDAY TO YOU!:partyguy: *runs away while Barb is covering ears and rolling on floor, trying to escape the horrible sound of my singing voice*

[Kida Adelyne]

Happy BirthDay!!!!!

:banana: :banana: :banana: :banana: :banana: :banana: :banana: :banana: :banana: :banana: :banana:

[Unique]

♪ ♪ ♫ It's your birthday - ♫♪ - you can cry if you want to - ♫ ♪ - fly if you want to - ♫♪ - sigh if you want to - ♫ ♪ ♪ ♪ - I would cry too, if I were as old as you.....Ω...♫ ♪ :Cake:

[batyler65]

Thanks everyone for the wonderful wishes. A great way to start a day that was looking a bit bleak. HUGS to all. :)

And now some EVEN BETTER news!

You all get a reprieve. I am so totally swamped today that I don't have time to go over the reports. If you haven't posted yet, now is your chance. I will be back tomorrow to administer the lashes.

Now, I must resume running from Bud. He has the whip and keeps muttering something about birthday whoopin's. Why oh why couldn't I have a normal muse?

Carry on!

Barb

[Jaycinth]

And I hope someone bakes you a wonderful butterscotch torte with raspberry dribbles and dark chocolate shavings and you get it all to yourself!

I confess, I didn't do anything this week (end) Funeral on Thursday, missed work so I came in early and left late Friday. Friday night I was still catching up with housework, when I found out my best friend's marriage just blew up spectacularly. Then my computer froze up. Saturday my kid had to be driven all over creation, and we never found any shoes and I accidentally bought a Koontz book. And I accidentally read it. All. Oops. I didn't do anything on Sunday either except drink lots of coffee and hide out in my room. I was depressed, so I stared at the ceiling.

I made none of my goals. I sat on them.

So I hereby promise that before Friday I will have posted the re-write of chapter one that everyone has critted with stunning aclarity. I might even post chapter 2 also. I will 'fix' chapter one of my second book and maybe even post it. And I will try to come up with an ending to 'The 3051 Accords' that will make it publishable.

And if I don't, you can pick out an avatar of unfavorable aspect, and I'll wear it for a week. (unless I like it.)

Hippy bath day to you, Hippy bath day to you, We'll take all the hippos, they'll be clean when we're through!!!!:hooray:

[scfirenice]

It's your Bath Day? You only have one day for that? Yuck. OHHHHHHHHHH. BIRTHDAY! Happy Birthday!!!!

[ChunkyC]

*ventures out for a moment like a mouse checking to see if the cat is sleeping*

Happy Birthday, Barberina!

*runs back into his hole*

[Jaycinth]

It's your Bath Day? You only have one day for that? Yuck.

Wait, wait, now you've confused me. Was I supposed to bathe? I can't type in the rain, silly!

[batyler65]

I love coming in here, you guys ALWAYS make me smile.

*feeling warm and fuzzy*

[allenparker]

<slinks in, sniffs te air> Cake! And candle wax! It's someone's birthday.

Happy birthday Barb. Hope you find much happiness now that you are 24 years old. I wore my birthday suit all day long in your honor. Well, there was one small time this afternoon when the police came to the door. With a title with two testerone-charged words in it, you would think that a mailman would be male! Apparently, when her testosterone left, I think her humor left with it. But I digress.

Wrote 2500 words in new work. Sent off two subs. Did a rewrite for a short story sub as requested. Answered an email about a agent query.

Left the old stuff sitting on the desk. So that they wwould not get lonely, added a new story idea to the pile.

BTW, can anyone route me to a place that shows the proper form for submitting to greeting card companies. I am beginning to believe it is a national secret.

As I leave, I wish the birthday girl a wonderful day. I hope you have many more. BTW, how does it feel to be 29 years old?

Allen

[alaskamatt17]

I've missed a couple weeks now on my writing gig, been getting adjusted to school again. I'm back in the swing of things now, though. Feel free to taser me a few times for the missed weeks. Hopefully it'll keep me motivated on my upcoming projects (editing that beastly novel I churned out this summer, and writing the novella I mentioned). Also, I'll need some luckwishing for the Purple Prose Competition. It seems some fools decided to vote me into the Top 5, so now I have three more horrendous paragraphs to write. I really want that copy of Atlanta Nights, too.

[Kitahoshi]

I love coming in here, you guys ALWAYS make me smile.

*feeling warm and fuzzy*

*huggles* Happy Birthday Barb, oh mistress of making the Kita work under pressure! Oh... I guess everyone else got to say it before me... U.U Well I'm gonna say something in German to make myself an individual in the crowd of individuals! Hello auf Deutsch ist Hallo! Guten Tag Barb! Wie alt bist du? Wie geht es Ihnen? Yep. Cause I'm cool.

http://www.absolutewrite.com/forums/images/smilies/emoteTheWave.gif

((above is all the weekenders wishing you happy birthday in relief of your timely reprieve... tee hee! ))

[Yeshanu]

*confused* It's hippo bath day? I'd better fill up the swimming pool and call in the hippo.

Oh, wait.

I don't have a swimming pool. Or a hippo...

OH! You mean it's BARB'S BIRTH DAY!

Well in that case, maybe Bud is too busy chasing Barb around the house (holds hands over eyes) to write poetry...

Report:

Goals for the coming week:

1) 2500 words on ATTS. No excuses. No fire extinguishers. Just words.

2) Finish rough draft of piece for next anthology.

3) Post some of the drivel I've been writing in SYW for shredding by the masses.

4) Find a beta reader for #2, get rough draft to them.

5) Find another market to work on for next week.


1) ATTS: 1728 words. Not the 2500 I'd hoped for, but not bad considering my abysmal progress in previous weeks.

2) Essay thing half done. Lookin' good at this point.

3) Drivel posted. Thanks for the crit, Barb and Unique.

4) Won't look for a beta reader until essay thing is all done.

5) Market found. Article started.

Also, I didn't want to spoil Ally's party, but I've got a piece in SOS as well.

:banana:

Goals for this week:

1) ATTS: 2500 + (2500 - 1728) words

2) Finish essay thing for anthology.

3) Find beta reader for essay thing.

4) Send out drivel to at least one market.

5) Rough draft of article for market in #5.

6) Start gathering list of contacts for SOS press release.

7) Report before midnight my time on SUNDAY!!!!

[gina]

Happy Birthday, Barb!

[triceretops]

Well, how strange is this? Just finished Planet Janitor--Custodian of the stars, and it's Barb's birthday! That could only mean you go on the dedication page, fer sure! Wow. Elapsed time--64 days. Last count was 119,000, and now it is 125,000, fini. Don't know why this one went so smoothly. It was fun, and I fell in love with it. The word count surpased the last book by 5,000. However, playtime is over. Now the work begins--the dreaded drafts. I hate this part of the gig more than anything, but it's vital. Gonna' treat it as a well-earned break and relax with it.

Tri

[Unique]

Why do you hate drafts, Tri? :Cheers: I'm rather fond of them myself...especially when the mug has been in the freezer...

[triceretops]

Well I might just take the time out to get one of those drafts!

Tri

[amyfin]

Happy Birthday, Barb.

Good luck with your draft Tri, no not the cold one, but that's a good idea Unique...

5000 words on my thesis since last post... can I vent here?

I'm so scared I'll never finish... everything I write looks like garbage to me. I can't even call my advisor and ask him questions about my work because I feel so awful it's taking me so long and I still don't have a finished draft for he and my other advisors to critique, and I can't even begin to imagine how bad it's going to get ripped apart... and I'm afarid even if I do hand it in this week they'll laugh and be like, you'll never get your revisions done in time to graduate and I'll and have to pay for another semester of school... (ok, I'm exaggerating my advisor is actually really cool and I know he would never laugh at anyone... at least not to their face) but you are technically supposed to have a finished draft at the beginning of the semester...

I know, I know, I need to quit having this pity party for myself....

How do those of you with kids get any 'serious' writing done? My kids are 1, 3, and 7. Any suggestions? Besides putting the little ones in a cage -- I've tried that, they just escape... must have been little Houdini's in their past lives.

I'm thinking Barb is going to send some lashes in my directions for posting my waaawaaa whining....

[batyler65]

GINA

Woohoo, Gina! Sounds wonderful. Only a couple of days left in the month. Make that fiction quota yet?

Keep churning out the writing.

smiley faces for you.

:) :) :) :)

[batyler65]

TRI

CONGRATULATIONS on reaching The End!

You were really cooking on that one. I am so impressed.

Don't let the drafts get you down. If you show as much enthusiasm for rewrites as you do the initial draft, i'm volunteering you to finish my rewrite. ;)

:) :) :) :)

[batyler65]

UNIQUE

Congrats on the work this week. Sounds like you had a full and productive week. I'm not sure where this puts you on your goals (especially since I heard no mention of chickens), but it DOES sound like you got some writing done.

Lashes for my little masochist.

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[batyler65]

CC:

The anthology is a worthy cause and I applaud you for your work on that. I worry though that it is an excuse not to do your own writing. What's up with those novels of yours? Have you coasted to a standstill?

Smileys for now.
:) :) :)

[batyler65]

SCFIRENICE

(I'm going to have to start calling you SC -- my fingers keep getting tied in knots! (well, there is a laziness factor involved,too. ;))

3.5k? Excellent. Keep moving like that and you will be finished in no time.

Congrats on the acceptance and kudos for the promotional work on SOS. Sounds like you've earned your smilies for the week. ;)

:) :) :) :)

[batyler65]

ALLY

A faulty memory will not excuse you. *looks stern*

I'm glad you are writing poetry and I know that you have to do some for school. But. BUT. What happened to Lost ID?

I'll give you one smiley for poetry. :)

Maybe these will help you find your focus, or at least your notebook.

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Don't make me hunt down the scary red whip.

[batyler65]

RAY

This is not a progress report. Check the manual. Progress reports include numbers and pages and whining and moaning.

Birthday wishes are wonderful :)

How is CTN? Hmm? Haven't heard anything here in awhile.

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[batyler65]

STORYGIRL

There seems to be a misconception that I abuse people at random around here. ;)

Sounds like you worked on your writing/revising. Plus, you are taking care of submissions. Don't be so hard on yourself. (Unless of course, you know you were capable of accomplishing more. Then you can beat yourself up as much as you like.)

Keep moving forward. And remember, any effort is better than none. Take it in baby steps if you have to, but keep moving forward.

:) :) :)

[batyler65]

JAYCINTH

Some weeks life just conspires against us. Those who have been locked up in here... er... I mean, those who have been longtime followers of WPR can probably repeat most of my mantras by heart. This is one of my top ten. Give yourself ten minutes every day. EVERY day. Write garbage if that is all that comes. Do it for ten minutes without stopping. If at the end of ten minutes, you just can't carry on, put it away. But give yourself those ten minutes. You don't even have to write in your WIP. Journal. Scream on paper if you are frustrated. But make it a habit. If you do, you will find it much easier to keep going when Real Life kicks the snot out of you.

small lashes, because you had a rough week.

http://www.absolutewrite.com/forums/images/smilies/Emotewhip.gif

[batyler65]

ALLEN

Excellent progress this week. Smiley faces for you. :) :) :) :)

RE: Greeting cards.

It really depends on the company. If they take 3x5 index cards the standard format is to put the greeting text on the front of the card:
Card ID #
Outside: (Illustration description if applicable) Card text
Inside: Card text

Your contact information goes on the reverse.

For e-mail subs or for companies that accept subs on 8.5 X 11 sheets

Contact info at top
(5 blank lines between each card)
Name (e-mail only)
Card ID
Outside: text
Inside : text


I always put my name right above EACH card idea when I send e-mail subs. It's something I got in the habit of doing when I wrote for Gibson. (That's how they wanted them, so that's how I did them.)

When in doubt, send off for guidelines. They usually give you all the info you need.

[batyler65]

MATT

Do you have a hall pass?

Welcome back.

You missed the goal reporting we did at the beginning of the month, so you'll have to step in and name what you intend to accomplish by the end of the year. That way I can dole out rewards/punishment as necessary. ;)

Good luck in the Purple Prose contest!

I hope everything else continues to fall into place.
Smiley faces for coming back: :) :)

Lashes to keep you motivated.
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[batyler65]

KITA

Report? That is not a report. And don't go making it in German. Not acceptable.

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[batyler65]

RUTH

Woohoo, Ruth. CONGRATS on your acceptance.

Nana dance: http://www.absolutewrite.com/forums/images/smilies/emoticonbanana.gifhttp://www.absolutewrite.com/forums/images/smilies/emoticonbanana.gifhttp://www.absolutewrite.com/forums/images/smilies/emoticonbanana.gifhttp://www.absolutewrite.com/forums/images/smilies/emoticonbanana.gifhttp://www.absolutewrite.com/forums/images/smilies/emoticonbanana.gifhttp://www.absolutewrite.com/forums/images/smilies/emoticonbanana.gifhttp://www.absolutewrite.com/forums/images/smilies/emoticonbanana.gif


And I am so pleased that you have started making progress. Actually, you didn't do badly at all with all those goals. Keep writing.

I'll be watching next week to see if you keep up the good work.

:) :) :) :)

[batyler65]

AMY

Sounds like you are FREAKING out. Stop! Take a deep breath. 5k is good progress. Stop letting the internal editor rule and just keep going. Another of my mantras (repeat after me) You can't fix a blank page. Write the words. Fix them later. Write. Just write.

As for writing with three kids. I started fulltime freelancing in '94. At the time, I had a 2yo, a 9yo and an 11yo. somehow I managed to squeeze the writing in between all the things that kids entail. Advice? Steal the minutes when you get them. Write while dinner simmers. Jot notes while you walk through the grocery store. Any time you get, grab it. Get up a little earlier or go to bed a little later. Tape the fave TV show and write instead of vegging.

Keep the faith.

:) :) :) :)

[Good Word]

I wrote 525 words on Sunday, drafting a new and better chapter one to my humble 13k-ish novel.

Getting back in the saddle,

Lisa

[Honey Nut Loop]

Er hi. Haven't posted in this thread before. I wrote 8000 words in the last three days. Does that get me a pat on the back? Have just typed The End to draft one but you're the only people who know about it so shh.

[Kida Adelyne]

((laughs becuase Kita had acctually completed her goal, but forgot to report))

Oh, Welcome to the Weekenders board Honey!:hi:

-Ally

[Kitahoshi]

KITA

Report? That is not a report. And don't go making it in German. Not acceptable.

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*big shiny eyes* ... You... you big meanie! I did post! I posted a long time ago! And I got my word goal too! *tear* *runs away*

(( page 71 - #1775 - last message on the page ))

You have no love from the magical editor!!!

[allenparker]

Er hi. Haven't posted in this thread before. I wrote 8000 words in the last three days. Does that get me a pat on the back? Have just typed The End to draft one but you're the only people who know about it so shh.

We won't tell a soul, except the people on the internet.

Welcome!

Allen

[Unique]

Oh yeah....welcome the new guy. Hi, Honey! <waves>

That is so not nice of you guys not to warn him....about Bud. About pudding. Pirate ships. Page 53. Electricity. Spies like You Guys.

Look, if Barb or Mac or Lori say anything about contracts...RUN.
Especially if they mention blood in the same sentence. Trust me.

It's a lot of fun around here. Just make sure you have something to placate the, uh - Taskmistress. She's Ok, but her muse - well, when he fills in for her -

-get a hall pass.

[Birol]

Our newest Weekender has already reached The End! That can only mean it's SMILEY PARTY TIME.
(Don't worry. We'll keep it quiet and only invite a few of our most favorite smileys.)

:PartySmil:PartySmil:PartySmil

[triceretops]

Oh, my gosh, another ender! Congrats, Honey. (Boy am I taking liberties). Now, 8,000 words in three days? Whoa! (Tri runs away and hides, peeking behind stump).

:Jump: :partyguy: :Trophy: :TheWave: :Cheer:
Tri

[gina]

GINA

Woohoo, Gina! Sounds wonderful. Only a couple of days left in the month. Make that fiction quota yet?

Keep churning out the writing.

smiley faces for you.

:) :) :) :)

My fiction quota is 5,000 and right now I'm at 4,725, so I don't see me meeting my quota being an issue. :)

[Honey Nut Loop]

Thankies everybody *blush*. I suddenly had a panic attack that i wasn't getting enough done. The story is entered in a comp that end on friday and the finalists will have to give in full MSs. on't know why i worry really. 13 finalists nationally? Phh. What chance is there.

[Unique]

Thankies everybody *blush*. I suddenly had a panic attack that i wasn't getting enough done. The story is entered in a comp that end on friday and the finalists will have to give in full MSs. on't know why i worry really. 13 finalists nationally? Phh. What chance is there.

Only 13? I'm not a math whiz, but I'd say your chances are GOOD. Now, get busy!

[Birol]

Someone has to win.

[batyler65]

((Why are we whispering? *appears beside the huddled group* I've already done 1600 words for the week on my sole day off from school work and other things. :P ))

(((((((((((KITA))))))))))))

Ah, yes, I see that now. There was so much chit chat going on that I missed it and only saw the other post.

APOLOGIES KITA. Please, please, please forgive me?

Extra smilies. :) :) :) :) :) :) :) :)

[batyler65]

WELCOME HONEY!

Sounds like we have a weekender on board to keep TRI on his toes. 8k in how long? Whoa! Keep an eye on this one.

So, Honey, what are your goals? Where do you want to be by the end of the year? What is your shoe size and how do you feel about pudding?

tellmetellmetellme

Barb

[batyler65]

(((((((((((((LISA))))))))))))))

Welcome back!!!!

You're gonna stick around this time, right? RIGHT?

Let's get that book finished this time. Next stop 15k. You can do it. Just send the writer to the desk and let the editor take a nap for a little while.

[batyler65]

My fiction quota is 5,000 and right now I'm at 4,725, so I don't see me meeting my quota being an issue. :)

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[Good Word]

I love you Barb!

[Honey Nut Loop]

WELCOME HONEY!

Sounds like we have a weekender on board to keep TRI on his toes. 8k in how long? Whoa! Keep an eye on this one.

So, Honey, what are your goals? Where do you want to be by the end of the year? What is your shoe size and how do you feel about pudding?

tellmetellmetellme

Barb

My goals? To do rewriting and editing on my just finished work. Then put it aside and i have two other novel ideas nagging me. Shoe size? Between five and 6. Depends. And puddin gis great. Banoffee Pie rules.

[ChunkyC]

Howdy, HNL! Welcome to the looney bin.

So, Barb ... yes, the novels have coasted to a standstill. All my energies are focused on the anthology. I'm even slacking off at work ... whaddyamean, how's anyone gonna notice?

Beat me if you must, but let's do dinner and dancing first, k? ;)

[Kitahoshi]

(((((((((((KITA))))))))))))

Ah, yes, I see that now. There was so much chit chat going on that I missed it and only saw the other post.

APOLOGIES KITA. Please, please, please forgive me?

Extra smilies. :) :) :) :) :) :) :) :)

Wellll.... okay. But you don't get a sleep-deprived monkey cheese.

[batyler65]

sleep deprived MONKEY cheese?

Is it a sleep deprived monkey, or a monkey cheese? *Thinking about Monkeys making cheese*

I'm truly frightened. But I suppose I deserve that. ;)

Keep up the good work Kita.

[Jaycinth]

I finished the rewrite of Sources' Code Chapter one and posted it back in 'Share'. So now I don't have to have an insulting avatar!. ( But you folks may read it and insult me.)

New Goals: Mid Term - Finish re-writing 'Parallel Course' by Halloween
Short... - Finish re-writing 'PC' chapter 11 by dinner time Sunday
Long.... - Finish writing first draft of 'Shivas' Dance' by January 29, 2006.


Yes, yes, I work much better under pressure and the threat of gratuitous violence. Please don't sell tickets without cutting me in on the take. 70% of gross will suffice

[batyler65]

Friday, SEPTEMBER 30 (RAY'S Birthday) 2005

First order of business:

HAPPY BIRTHDAY RAY!!! HOPE YOU HAVE A FANTASTIC DAY! http://www.absolutewrite.com/forums/images/smilies/emoticonbanana.gif



Welcome to the end of September, Weekenders. Since tomorrow officially marks the beginning of a brand new month, it's time for a new challenge. I've peeked in at our rejection pile and while we have made great strides this year, we are nowhere near our goal of 1,500 rejections. We ARE nearing 600 though and that is a BIG DEAL. Now it is time to go for the gold. The OCTOBER CHALLENGE: Submit one item (any type: query, editorial, recipe, joke... I don't care) each week for the entire month of October. Anything submitted in October stands a chance of getting a response by the end of the year. If you can submit more than one per week, go for it. I know you guys are up for this.



And now, to get those creative juices flowing...

ONCE UPON A WEEKEND...

The plane shuddered. Barb looked up from her notebook in annoyance. Turbulence made it hard to write. She crossed off items on her weekly to-do list:
Subbed greeting cards to two companies -- check
Subbed slogans to another -- check
outlined the monthly humor column -- check
completed bonus issue proposals and submitted -- check
completed the February newsletter (first draft) -- check
sent resume and clips to be considered for assignments at a parenting site -- che~~~~.
Her pen jitterbugged across the page as the plane hit another batch of turbulent air. This time, the turbulence seemed determined to shake the plane out of the sky. As the flight attendant asked everyone to remain calm and make certain their seat belts were fastened it became apparent this flight was going down. (Mostly because we wouldn't have a story if it didn't.)

*Screaming*

*Screeching of metal*

CRASH!

*Darkness*

When Barb regained consciousness, she discovered that she and a handful of survivors appeared to be stranded on an island in the middle of nowhere.

"Where are we?" Barb asked.

"We appear to be stranded on an island in the middle of nowhere," said Lori, who had appeared from the other side of the wreckage.

"Duh," said Barb.

Just then, a troop of amethyst anthropoids carrying typewriters loped by in a way that suggested loping might just, if considered properly, be the best mode of transport for typewriters if you happened to be an amethyst anthropoid.

"Oh, no," said Mac, pulling the radio from the damaged cockpit.

"What? Is it beyond repair?" asked Renee'. "Cuz, I got some duct tape over here in my bag. I brought it from my trailer back home."

"Worse than that," Mac said, nodding at the passing troop. "We've crash-landed on the Island of the Purple Prose Monkeys."

Renee's eyes went wide and round (well they were already sort of round, because who has square eyes?). "Oh!" she exclaimed. "Even duct tape won't fix that."

"No," Lori moaned. "Oh, not that! We are LOST!"

"No," corrected Barb. "LOST is that popular TV show. We are MISPLACED."

Soon, a crowd of survivors began to emerge from the smoking wreckage...





(For those who haven't played once upon a weekend before, it's easy. Simply weave your progress report into the story. make it as long or as short as you need to, and have fun! Most of all, don't panic. we're just here to have fun, not to critique the efforts. ;))

[scfirenice]

"Purple Prose Monkeys? I don't no nothin' 'bout no Purple Prose Monkeys," SC remarked as she hopped on one leg from the plane wreckage. There was no apparent injury, she just wanted to hop.
"Ah man. Where IS everyone?" She hopped over to a monkey and poked it in its eye. The typewriter fell to the ground, but the monkey stayed silent.
"Help, I'm misplaced and I seem to have forgotten what I've accomplished this week. AMNESIA. I have amnesia. I can't report if I have amnesia," looks around to see if anyone believes her.

[batyler65]

The amethyst anthropoid who had been standing as silently as is possible for an amethyst anthropoid who has been jabbed in its ocular orifice chose that moment as the most perfectly timed moment to begin a recitation of rhyme.

You must remember this
a kiss is just a kiss
unless there is a tongue invollllllllved
and then it is a lick
a word that rhymes with stick
notice how this thing revolved?

And as we have a stick
your skull seems rather thick,
perhaps your memory would improooooove
ifwegaveyouaquickrapatopthehead.

And with that, the amythest anthropoid snatched up the stoutest of stout, limbiest of limbs and administered a loud hollow thump to SC's head.

[batyler65]

POSTED::

WARNING!!!

DO
NOT
FEED THE MONKEYS

[scfirenice]

SC stumbles away from the amythyst anthropoid weilding a large limb and lists left slightly.
"ohhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh. My head. My aching head," she recites. "Where am I , who am I?"
The monsterous amythyst antropoid grins. SC sees a bananna hanging from a limb, and having now COMPLETELY forgotten EVerything due to her recent head trauma, hands the banana to the Monkey.
"Nice monkey. Such a nice monkey." The monkey's face shows sheepish smiles simply as he takes the banana a runs.
"What the? Come back...Come back... Huh, What's this typewriter for?

[scfirenice]

SC looks for help. Where is everyone she thinks? Surely I'm not by myself on this oddly inhabited planet...seems to me there is a Barb around here, ooo and a KatieMac, oh, how Unique is that? Seems I could use a Story," She thinks as she kicks the typewriter, if that's what it REALLY is.
Walking away she begins to sing, "Purple Monkey, that funky monkey. Purple monkey junky that funky monkey."

[batyler65]

Barb pokes her head around the wreckage.

"SC! Yo! Over here! You're on the wrong side of the plane."

[scfirenice]

"What? Plane? Oh yeah. I was on the RIGHT side until I got whacked in the head," Sc says hopping around to the correct side of the plane. "THERE you are. What's up with the large lavender lemmers?"
Barb scurries down from the top of the plane were she had previoulsy sat surveying her kingdom.
"The plane was full. Where is everyone? Scattered like rats on a sinking ship....oh wait. That was another report.

[Unique]

pssst...'You guys....I'm over here', Unique whispered as she peeked through the branches of a low lying shrub. 'Did you come to rescue me?'

'Rescue you? How long have you been here? I thought you were on the plane with us', scfirenice exclaimed.

'You have a plane? Oh, get me out of here! This island is overrun with giant purple prose monkeys. I've been here nearly a week! Didn't you miss me?' 'Look out! Here comes another one!'

Unique scrambled back into the shrubbery with a rustle of leaves. 'I'm not coming out. I won't, I won't. I wrote over 1,000 words this week for those simple scarlet simians. Their evil plan to purplize the classics won't continue with my help! I know they hatched their plan after watching colorized classics on TNT. Blast Ted Turner, anyway for giving them the idea!'

'They won't get away with it! The original text is still hidden beneath the purple. All will be revealed in t--' A piercing scream ripped the air. The bush where Unique had taken refuge shuddered violently and went still.

[scfirenice]

"UNIQUE???" sc screamed. Oh no. Did the Lavender Lemmings take her? Did a large typwriter fall from the sky? How the hell did she get here without a plane? These are the questions inquiring minds are asking." SC yells. "Oh wait. This isn't a commercial, this is real life! UNIQUE. Don't leave me alone here.
SC stomps through the empty brush while Barb is busily typing away after having made her own paper from coconuts. How the hell does she get it all done, SC wonders kicking aside a small orange furry creature. What the heck is 'Purple Prose' anyway. Must be something form the Sixties involving, um, strange plants.
I'm not reporting Barb. I have until Sunday and by the Gods, I'm waiting! Now get one of those aromatic apes to bring me a laptop, I have work to do!" SC points and gestures at a laboring Barb. "Unique?"
On the horizon a form appears, growing larger and larger as it approaches.
"It's, It's..."

[Yeshanu]

<Ruth sneaks out from behind a bush, ignoring the looming shadow bearing down on sc. She places a birthday cake on the sand in front of the downed plane, then sits with her back to a tree, notebook in hand. She's still writing, as she has until midnight Sunday to report, but she wanted to wish Ray a happy birthday. Mindful of the fact that due to Barb's warning, the purple prose monkeys are now very hungry, she keeps one eye on the cake as she writes. Any purple prose monkey who tries to steal a piece of that cake (at least before Ray has his piece) is gonna be banned from playing Sims for a whole week...>


http://bestsmileys.com/birthday2/8.gif

[Kitahoshi]

Kita brushes off the dust from her blue blouse like a broom against a hard wooden floor. She looks around the leering trees lurkingly. On her head crouches a crown made of coconuts which well accents the monkey tail she is wearing.

"I am Queen! Queen of purple prose monkeys like maniac mongolian leaders!
Fear my immense powers like a cockroach for I shall,
Speak bad poetry at you while hiding all the while,
Behind my finished Poetry Portfolio which was due on Wednesday."

She glances around the gangley gollum like ruins and sits on her thorny throne.

"Ouch! Darn Alliteration- it hurts! I did finish the aforementioned Poetry Portfolio that I have titled: My wallet is a haunted house. I have not written-eth becauseth I was under-eth the weather...ith."

[gina]

Gina comes out from where she had been quietly waiting near the back of the plane. A few cuts and bruises, a bit drained from another busy writing week. She had rescued her notebook with all her writing in it, and now she glanced down at it, reading over all she had done that week.

* Submitted short story to e-zine, quickly rejected.
* Heard back on a contest she entered - not chosen as one of the top three finalists.
* Submitted another short to a different e-zine earlier today, awaiting response.
* Kept up with her weekly reviews and recaps on her review site.
* Also did some additions and edits to the rejected short.
* She met her fiction quota for the month with 5,010 words.
* Wrote a total of 15,258 words for the week making for a grand total of 35,725 words for the month.

She smiles and waves at everyone. "I'm off to sleep. Don't let the monkeys get me!"

[Kitahoshi]

Gina suddenly disappeared from view, as the camera veers up to show Kita laughing maniacally on a misty purple mountain by marsh with a caged sleeping Gina beside her.

"Bwahahaha! Fearfully you fright at my frame like a frown!
You shall nevereth taketh my shoes away!
I shall make purple prose monkeys of you all!"

Upon closer inspection it should be noted that there is a tiny flashing red beepy thing on Kita's neck.

[scfirenice]

Sc stares at the red blinky light on Kita's neck as she dashes away from the looming shadow.
"Fools! You are all freakish fools," she frowned furiously.
"That's what they WANT. Report. Don't report yet for surely then the giant glowing gossmar gorillas will get you. They are hungry for report, DO Not feed them until the last moment! AHHHHHHHHHHHHH."
SC reaches down to the earth scarpping a huge clump of the oddly odiferous purple soil and smears it across her face yodeling like Xena as she tears her sleeves in defiance.
"You cannot make me! I will not succumb like the others. See what happened to Unique? She reported and was dragged daringly down shortly afterwards. Not Me"
SC reaches towards Kita's red light thinking, uh-oh. This is worse than the time she disguised herself as a yak and used Kita as a sheild. There must be a way out of this maybe. Maybe the shadow looming can help, maybe.....

[triceretops]

Computer...not...working...MSL and internet...down. Came in through backdoor--big Blue "E". Computer on a slow crash--don't know if I'll be back.

Tri couldn't move. That last thing he remembered was using the plane's lavatory then the world came crasing down. He was now wearing the septic tank around his head and flattened in a confined space. He tried to yell but a roll of toilet paper was wedged in his mouth. Then he heard metal tearing away from him, then saw a shaft of sunlight. He spit out the paper wad and pulled the tank off his head. He'd been liberated by a purple monkey--a really big monkey.

Big foot.

But this one had a hulu skirt on and two coconut shells. And man did she smell, but so did I. Hence the attraction, I guess. She yanked me out of the wreckage and plopped me on the sand and, handing me a stick, said "Ooga booga." Which translates to "Go write a message in the sand."

So I scrawled a message in the sand: DID NO WRITING THIS WEEK AT ALL--ONLY EDITING CAUSE I COULDN'T KEEP MY STINKIN' MITTS OUT OF THE STORY. 210 PAGES AND THAT'S IT. MSL IS DOWN AND THE COMPUTER IS SLOWLY CRASHING, SO THIS MIGHT BE IT FOR AWHILE. LOOKS LIKE GINA MIGHT KICK THE OLD DOG OUT--WHAT A WELCOME RELIEF!

Big foot gal handed tri a little rum drink with a tiny umbrella. They held hands, and together they walked down the sandy beach toward the dipping sun, listening to tropical tunes coming from big gal, cause she wore a Walkman. He waved back to all the plane wreck surviors and said, "bydee bye."

Tri

[Kida Adelyne]

Ally lead Tri along, wondering suddenly why she was listening to something as primitive as a walkman. However, this flash of brilliance quickly faded and she was left the purple monkey she had been all week.

"Oook." She said when she reached thier destination. Translating to: "Our personas have meandered most tediously and we are quite enervated, but we must now visit out exacerbated monarch."

"Oook." She said as she reached Kita. Meaning "My tedious labours have consummated. In the course of my jorney I have, like a young lion at the carcass of a zebra, completed my confounded collection of Poetry. I also brought you a snack." And then she pointed at Tri. She then wandered off to start the sacrificial fire.

[Yeshanu]

*gasp* :roll: *gasp*

[ChunkyC]

CC squatted serenely upon the tail appendage of the wrecked Airbus380, with both 'black boxes' hidden beneath his prodigiously ponderous posterior, and regarded the large purple prose monkey as it tried to pluck Tri in preparation for lunch. Tri seemed to be taking offense, but it was difficult to be certain from this distance.

CC tapped SEND on his laptop, and was gratified to see that the island had a wireless hotspot installed as his weekly column zipped off to his editor. Naturally, it did not occur to him to ask said editor for assistance in getting off the island, mostly because his stomach was growling stentorially and Tri appeared to be nearly ready for the pot.

Seeing as he had nothing else to send off other than acknowledgement of his work on a marketing plan for the Canadian contingent of the SOS anthology (the irony of the SOS acronym also flew completely over his head due to the aforementioned hunger pangs), CC shut down his laptop and stood up to stretch.

It was at this moment that the other survivors noticed the two black (red actually) boxes he'd been sitting on. None of them seemed eager to examine them to see what had caused the crash because, well, CC appeared to have been using them as a rectal barometer and might also have farted on them for all they knew.

That's when the sky was rent with a melodious roar, and....

[Yeshanu]

That's when the sky was rent with a melodious roar, and....

... curses and swearing too intemperate for someone with a Master of Divinity degree erupted fulsomely from Ruth's shapely lips.

"#$%^ing printer!" she swore. "I just intoned prodigious praise for your sleek, elegant beauty and seemingly inexhaustible capacity to produce multiple pages of perfectly edited, clear, crisp, black words only last night over a delicious chicken dinner with roast Yukon Gold potatoes and tart apple crisp made from apples picked only last week. I went out and with my hard-earned money made by sitting day after day in a hot, noisy factory putting fiberglass filters over little metal tubes, bought you a brand-new-brand-name cartridge full of dark, black, sloshy ink, and you have to go and choose today, of all days, the day that I was going to FINALLY send out a submission, to decide that your pitiful life is now over."

Ruth tore at the cables connecting the offending printer to her sleek, black, almost-brand-new computer, and approached CC. "May I borrow your laptop for a moment, Chunky?" she asked, careful to ensure that he was facing her in case any melodious and malodourous discharge erupted from his rear nether region. Quickly she tapped a few keys, and went back to her post under the tree, as Ray hadn't yet shown up to eat his cake. (No matter that the cake was now two days old and attracting flies. Ruth figured that this would only make it more sumptious for Ray, and if he didn't show up, they could always make soup from the bugs in a pinch. Except that Ray had the recipe...)

A few hours later, as hours are measured in those parts, a box attached to a rainbow-coloured parachute floated down out of the sky. The box said, "Samsung ML-2010 Laser Printer" on the side. Ruth quickly hooked it up and test-printed a few pages. She jumped back startled as it spit out the pages in record time. "Whoa, Nellie! I think I'm gonna like this thing!" she said to no-one in particular.

She sat back down with her notebook and contemplated her week's work. No word count on ATTS, she mused, but I'm going great guns on the outline, and I've got three or four pages of stuff to type in. A whole essay I should post in the SYW forum so that our beloved taskmistress can pick it apart. Another essay ready to go out the door. Outline for two more articles that shouldn't be too hard to whip into shape. Research for one non-fiction book, and an outline for a second one. And some contact with the third SOS writer to be based in my little city of about 100,000 souls. :D

Now, if only I can keep the purple out of my prose... (Uh, oh...)

[maestrowork]

Upon seeing the flies on the cake, Ray crawled out from a bush and said, "Holy, I just had the most amazing birthday... I was in a wreckage! And I just crossed the magic 50K mark on CTN..." Then he dropped and died.

Meanwhile...

[batyler65]

...Barb nudged Ray with her toe.
"You can't die now, slacker!" she shouted. "You've just crossed the 50K mark. There will be parties. There will be...uh... cake."

Barb looked at the fly-strewn icing.

"or... maybe not."

Just then Mac rounded the wreckage with a set of jumper cables. "Everybody stand back! I know just what to do!"

She knelt beside slacker Ray and touched the ends of the jumper cables together. Sparks flew.

"Hmm..." she mused. "I wonder how much voltage a plane battery has?" But because she had no access to CC's laptop, she couldn't google it. She shrugged and decided to risk it.

"Believe me, Ray, this is gonna hurt me more than it does you..." Gripping the cables firmly, she leaned over Ray's limp body prepared to attach the cables when suddenly...

[scfirenice]

SC ran around the corner shouting the Xena war cry.
"NNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNOOOOOOOOOOOOO. Not Ray. Who will host the House of Love? Rhymegirl? She's great but Ray keeps the tub flowing so nicely." She lay over Ray's prone body as Barb arced the jumper cables again. I can fix him without electricity. SC gave Ray's chest the dreaded precordial thump (google it) Ray sputters and coughs as his chest once again rises and falls.
Barb reaches for SC with her cables.
"OKAY! I'll report. 2500 new words in TVS3 ripped out another 250 and rewrote them as well. One new sub in, one new rejection woohoo." SC cries as the cables reach closer and closer. Suddenly.....

[batyler65]

(pssssst! SC? MAC has the cables, not me;))

[MacAllister]

Mac stared, fascinated but slightly alarmed at SC, prone on top of Ray, apparently giving him CPR. Or something.

"Errr--SC, really, a little zap with the jumper cables won't hurt him a bit. He likes it. He must, or he wouldn't show up here begging for a little charge, like he does...Besides, I need to test 'em out! Now MOVE it, girlie!"

SC planted herself on Ray's chest, staring defiantly at Mac. "I won't, and you can't make me!"

"I'm not that worried about, actually," Mac narrowed her eyes and flashed her teeth in a predatory grin, "A circuit is a circuit. You might wanna just bite down on something, so you don't bite your tongue..." She started forward, waving the business ends of the jumper cable.

[Birol]

Before she could get much closer, Lori popped out of the irridescent sand beneath the erstwhile Macallister's feet, knocking her backwards like a weeble that did wobble and fall down. The ends of the cables touched and sparks flews upwards like lightening bugs trapped in the vortex of a whirlwind.

"Crimeney, I'm glad to see you guys," she said over Mac's wolfish howling.

Barb eyed her warily, as if she might suddenly sprout antenna and wings and become something other than the wayward writer she was. "Really, Lori? You've been hiding for three or four weeks now?"

Lori blushed a spectacular shade of crimson that would have rivaled the setting sun, if the sun had been setting. "Well, I might have originally stowed away on this plane in an effort to avoid you -- how did you track me to this flight anyway?"

"We have our ways, we have our ways," Barb said. Her foot tapped a staccato rhythm against the sand. She glanced meaningfully at the business-end of the duty-bound jumper cables whose ends Mac was attempting to separate admist the dancing ballet of sparkling lights.

"I haven't been hiding. I've been working." Lori's voice trailed off like a little used path in the woods.

At that moment the Purple Prose Monkeys erupted into mad howling that was totally unlike Mac's wolfish howling and began beating a tribal dance rhythm on their aforementioned typewriters, many of which were not purple or amethyst or even lavendar but an earthly shade of brown.

"REPORT!" Barb's voice boomed over the racket, drowning them out the way a sonic boom drowns out a television set.

Lori fell to her knees in supplication as if worshipping Barb's magnificence or at least as if she were terrified of the dimunitive taskmistress all Weekenders honored at least once weekly.

"I can't give you a word count for the entire time period of my absence," Lori started hesitantly, edging up onto her report like an amethyst anthropoid on a cooking pot, "because I've shredded most of the papers I've tracked such things on, but I did finish detangling POV Character #1 and have started detangling POV Character #4, the last of the POV Characters I need to finish before reaching The End. Also, I submitted my flash story I wrote earlier this year and followed up on a couple of markets. Oh, and I recharged my creative batteries and have done homework. Lots and lots of homework. Some of it even involved writing. I wrote a whole paper on the meaning of the word interpellates and how it relates to Marxist theory and...."

Lori's rambling roundabout report was interrupted by....

[batyler65]

interrupted by...
Barb. She saw Mac edging back toward Ray with the jumper cables. "Leave him," Barb commanded. "We have bigger problems!"

"Bigger than dead Ray?" asked Mac arching one eyebrow.

Sc took advantage of the distraction to drag Ray away. He groaned softly. "Alive!" SC trilled. "He's alive!" A maniacal gleam entered her eyes. "Ray lives! He lives! My creation lives!"

Barb rolled her eyes. "It takes so little to make her happy."

Mac nodded. "I see that, but you mentioned problems. I LIVE for problems. What is it?"

Barb stared appraisingly at Mac. "I think the only reason you live for problems is to keep you distracted from Weird. I notice you haven't reported lat--" Barb shook her head vigorously. "No, must not get sidetracked. We have trouble, right here in purple city. Trouble that starts with T and that rhymes with P which stands for Monkeys..." Barb trailed off, her lips continuing to move as she tried to work out just what exactly P had to do with Monkeys and why she should suddenly be mangling lyrics from The Music Man.

"Oh, Monkeys," Mac said. "I thought you were going to talk about how more than half the passengers seem to be missing and there are no bodies."

"Yes! That's EXACTLY what I was going to bring up. Where are Katiemac, Allen, Renee', Storygirl, Lisa, Jaycinth, Joanne, and Natalia? And where did Honey get to? I know I had a longer list of reporters."

At that moment, CC called down from his perch atop the plane. "There seems to be some kind of sacrificial fire burning over that direction. He paused and pointed to the east. "And there seem to be a mob of dazed writers heading straight for the flames. All is LOST!!" CC screamed.

"No," reminded Barb. "LOST is a popular TV series."

*assorted groans*

"I'm not standing by while these purple prose primates massacre my writing posse," Barb asserted. "Quick, toss me my whip. Nobody forces my writers to write but me!"

With that, Barb headed out over the hill to rescue the wretched writers with her well-worn whip at the ready. (Say THAT ten times fast.) Soon, she was driving them... er... leading, yeah, that's it, LEADING them back to safety. Her words of encouragement carried to the encampment: "What do you mean I can't lead from the REAR? See this whip? Hush up! Don't you drop those typewriters! Get a move on!"

Two purple prose monkeys occupied the cage where Gina had so recently slept. They ooked softly in the still night air. Tri, looking somewhat confused from too many rum drinks, poked at the purple prose primates with tiny umbrellas.

Ray, returned from the dead... mostly, lurched through the encampment much to the glee of SC who for some reason considered him her CREATION.

Everyone else sat in a circle on the beach and typed as Barb instructed:

I WILL NOT WRITE PURPLE PROSE... I WILL NOT WRITE PURPLE PROSE... I WILL NOT WRITE PURPLE PROSE...

As the sun set, Lori looked up from her typewriter and whispered to Ruth. "Do you think there's a chance at rescue?"

"We've got a better chance at cancellation," Ruth replied.

"Enough talking over there," Barb growled. "Back to work with you."

*fade to black*

Next Week on MISPLACED: Will the missing members be found? Will the prose monkeys produce the works of Shakespeare? Will Kitahoshi stop trying to snack on Tri's fingers? And what exactly does Ally mean when she says Oook?



Thanks to all who took the ball and ran with it this week. To those of you who failed to report in... don't think escape is that easy. bwaahahahahahaaaaaaa!


Happy writing!
Barb

[allenparker]

Allen sits on the bar stool of the airport lounge, draped over his laptop.

"Damn! I missed the plane!"

Allen was so busy writing his 3500 words of the WIP and rejoicing over a request for a full manuscript from his first choice pub that he forgot to get onboard.

Allen

[batyler65]

WOOHOO! ALLEN!

Way to go on the full MS request. *crossing fingers*

Keep us posted!

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[Jaycinth]

You think you know what happened. But it happened to me. I blame it on the cold medicine. I had no idea I was on that plane. Yet plain as the nose on your face, (or was it someone elses face, I get confused some-times.) there it is, under the still smouldering date palms. Someone is dancing. Maybe they all are. I've been screaming. My throat is dry. it hurts. I think the white jacket is a bit tight. I’ll scream again. They just put it on me because they removed my arms.



THE PURPLE PROSE MONKEYS REMOVED MY ARMS. !!!! I thrashed in the sand, certain I could feel my arms under the unrelenting binding. When did the monkeys learn to use buckles? They’d thrown me in the sand. Why? At least it was warm. Warm as the blood of dismembered secondary characters. Warm as the blood of the EVIL ADVERB FAIRY! How I long to taste that blood. I dream of it you know. I dream…I dream….



Chapter 11 is ‘finished’. I added 3,000 new words (+ or – 100). The old words weren’t cooperating. I believe this was a result of interference from the EVIL ADVERB FAIRY. I was feeling lightheaded and I was in no mood for that, so I gassed up the chainsaw and chased that !%#%@$! Fairy out of my chapter. Then I spent Saturday afternoon doing triage. The patient will not only live, but thrive.



I thought I saw the EAF flitting through chapter 12, but the characters in that chapter are strong and they fought off the incursion easily. I’ll review them at the end of the week, but it doesn’t look like they need much more than a tad of punctuation.



Chapter 13 is a different story. The EAF corrupted the entire thing. I saw red! By the time I’d finished, chapter 13 was shreaded all over the hard drive. Sentence fragments, participles dangling looking for conjunctions or even prepositional phrases. The NOUNS! oh the poor nouns! Is there no mercy? Not with my chainsaw there ain’t.



It is going to require serious time and effort to reconstruct this crime scene. Chapter 13 will survive, but in what form? We can match the DNA, I suppose. With the help of MC’s, it should have legs by Halloween.



Then I realized the EAF had wormed its way into Book 3. Did I mention the cold medicine? It’s NOT MY FAULT. NOT. MY. FAULT!!!!!! I chased the damned fairy through the first 5 chapters of book 3, but despite my slash and burn tactics, the fairy escaped. Book three is in tatters, MC’s scattered through the pages, adrift, clinging to verbs, begging for mercy. What have I done? What kind of monster am I? It will be cherry blossom time before I’ve reconstructed this! Some of the characters may die. I’m sure of it.



My short story is still hanging. I’ve beaten it daily but it still wants to lend itself to a happy ending. NO HAPPY ENDING FOR YOU!!!! I didn’t write the story to roll in warm fuzzies. I have written and ( heh heh heh) deleted 4 endings for this already, and none of them manage to resolve the story without nice feelings. If I’d wanted a happy ending I would have written a story about puppies and kittens on an adventure to find pastel colored satin bows. So the short story is going to hang there in chains until it accepts one of the endings that I want it to have. I will abuse it daily. If only to keep it from embracing the EAF.

Take that, you monkeys!!!!!!!


HEH HEH HEH HEH HEH HEH!!!!!!!

[ChunkyC]

THIS JUST IN!!

(sounds of hundreds of prose monkey fingers clacking away upon manual typewriters)


Dateline Island Misplaced: A huge grant has been granted by the Department Of Seemed Like A Good Idea At The Time (DOSLAGIATT) to study the connection between Mondays, the Internet and hernias. Said a spokesperson ... for whom, we have no idea....

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[scfirenice]

It's a wonder we all aren't locked up in soft places sipping pill laden cocktails.

[ChunkyC]

It's a wonder we all aren't locked up in soft places sipping pill laden cocktails.
I thought we were.... http://pages.prodigy.net/rogerlori1/emoticons/pi_bigsmile.gif

[batyler65]

I thought we were.... http://pages.prodigy.net/rogerlori1/emoticons/pi_bigsmile.gif


SHHHHHHHH! Charlie! Everyone will want one.

[allenparker]

It's a wonder we all aren't locked up in soft places sipping pill laden cocktails.

You aren't?

Waiter, check please...

Allen

[Kitahoshi]

Next Week on MISPLACED: Will the missing members be found? Will the prose monkeys produce the works of Shakespeare? Will Kitahoshi stop trying to snack on Tri's fingers? And what exactly does Ally mean when she says Oook?

Happy writing!
Barb

*sits beside the thorny throne in lush grasses while rubbing her bottom* Arg... that was like wearing really uncomfortable shoes. >.< But ah well. *stands and dances in her purple prose monkey Queen get-up* ((Purple Prose Monkey Queen Get-Up-- coconut crown, monkey tail and torn purple gown that is incredibly clean for plane crash clothing))

[alaskamatt17]

I'm sorry I can't be a regular participant in this thread--I started reading George R. R. Martin's Song of Ice and Fire and it's consuming my life. I'm almost through with A Clash of Kings though, so maybe then I'll have free time (who am I kidding? I have too many projects going on.) Anyways, I have a whole bundle of stories brewing in my mind right now, and if history is any indication they'll start spewing out onto paper (or my screen) soon enough.

As to goals: I hope to edit my second book at least once before the end of the year, and I hope to complete and mail off my first Hard SF novella as well.

[Honey Nut Loop]

well this thred seems to have taken a strange turn. I wrote 2k words last night for a brand new WIP and also sent out three agent queries yesterday

[Unique]

well this thred seems to have taken a strange turn. I wrote 2k words last night for a brand new WIP and also sent out three agent queries yesterday

Well of course it has. Why do you think we show up week after week?

[Honey Nut Loop]

lol. And i guess that's also why it's in the humour section.

[Unique]

:idea: lol. And i guess that's also why it's in the humour section.

[batyler65]

Honey Nut,
Hope you aren't put off by our wackiness. We periodically do strange things like write a group story instead of the same old dry progress reports. :)

Congrats on starting a new project and for getting those agent queries out there. :) :) :) Heck, you've nearly met the October challenge already!

[batyler65]

All right, Matt. Don't toy with me. Nobody likes a tease. ;)

Get with the program and get that editing started. It IS October already. Reading is great, but allowing it to take over your life (aka become a distraction to keep you from writing is bad, got it? Bad. And I don't mean the sorta cool Baaaad either. Besides, you have to come back next week and report. It's your turn to bring the pudding.

:)

[ChunkyC]

Honey Nut,
Hope you aren't put off by our wackiness. We periodically do strange things like write a group story instead of the same old dry progress reports. :)
Even though we've had a noir detective thriller, a sci-fi-ish n-dimensional puzzler, and been attacked by Johnny Depp wannabe pirates; Barb always seems to end up wearing high heels and fishnet stockings while wielding a whip, and Mac is always fooling around with jumper cables attached to some gadget that's putting out entirely too much power.

And that's before anyone breaks out the recreational pharmaceuticals.

[batyler65]

no more high heels for me. And next time, I'm giving Mac something truly dangerous.

Bwaaahahahahahaaaaaa!

[Birol]

I'm just happy I'm not forced to hide under the table any more.

[Yeshanu]

Besides, you have to come back next week and report. It's your turn to bring the pudding.

:hooray: Pudding next week, everybody! :hooray:

Congrats on the full ms request, Allen!

http://bestsmileys.com/fireworks/9.gif

[Kida Adelyne]

Besides, you have to come back next week and report. It's your turn to bring the pudding.

Can you make sure Bud and Trish don't know it's going on? I would like to keep my sight for a little longer, at the very least.

[Kitahoshi]

Can you make sure Bud and Trish don't know it's going on? I would like to keep my sight for a little longer, at the very least.

Who needs sight? *blind singing monkey runs into wall* Oh. I see. Ah well. Just wanted to tell you all now that my musical is next week so the only writing I'll be able to so is for Writer's Craft. >.< Gahhhh.... What if I mess up my lines on stage?

[Honey Nut Loop]

I just got a request for a full!!!!! Am soooo excited. it's my first ever on my first ever query letter.

[Kida Adelyne]

:banana: :banana: :banana: :banana: :banana: :banana: :banana: :banana: :banana: :banana: :banana: :banana: :banana:

NANA DANCE FOR HONEY!!!!!!

[Unique]

:hooray:Hooray! For Honey!:hooray:





*blind singing monkey runs into wall*
Gahhhh.... What if I mess up my lines on stage?


Kita - if you forget your lines, break into song. They'll never know the difference. Well, your stagemates might - but the audience won't....

[Honey Nut Loop]

I'm honoured. My first cheer and nana dance. :kiss: :Hug2: :Cheers:

[batyler65]

PARTY FOR HONEY NUT!!!!!!!!!!!

Way to go!!!!!

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[ChunkyC]

nana's for Honey Nut and Allen on their full manuscript requests!!

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[Kida Adelyne]

Kita - if you forget your lines, break into song. They'll never know the difference. Well, your stagemates might - but the audience won't....

She's in a musical though...:ROFL:

[ChunkyC]

She's in a musical though...:ROFL:
Maybe 'rapping' then? (I can just see it ... right in the middle of "Oh-klahoma -- YO....")

[Unique]

She's in a musical though...:ROFL:

She has to sing the whole thing? :faint: She's doomed.

(I thought they called those operas? Does she get to wear one of those pointed shirts and horns on her head? Maybe she can borrow Sven's.)

[Yeshanu]

HoneyNut:


http://bestsmileys.com/fireworks/3.gif


Congrats on the full ms request. (Barb, it seems like this is catching. If it keeps up, your rejection thread won't get anywhere near the goal. :) ) (And whatever it is, I hope I catch it soon. Can't. Stand. Day. Job. Much. More.)

[Kitahoshi]

She has to sing the whole thing? :faint: She's doomed.

(I thought they called those operas? Does she get to wear one of those pointed shirts and horns on her head? Maybe she can borrow Sven's.)

I would if I weren't playing a newsboy. XD And technically I just sing in the background and do small things here and there. It's lucky for me that it's just me and the other newsboy on stage for two scenes in the musical so if I make a mistake he can bail me out somehow. http://www.absolutewrite.com/forums/images/smilies/EmoteROFL.gif

You know, I think I made a big mistake from the beginning. I didn't make it clear that my forte was singing, not acting. Dang. I should have sung for them in the audition but I didn't know I had to have something prepared ( my dad was just randomly like: "Well, you're going to go try out for a musical tonight.") And besides, I might have broke into japanese song.

Kimi wo suki ni natte durekurai tatsu no kana,
Kimochi fukurande yuku bakari de,
Kimi wa kono omoi hituiteru no kana,
Ichido mo kotobaniwa shitenai kedo,

Yuki no youni tada shizukani,
Furistumori tsuzukete yuku....

[Good Word]

Hey Barb!

I'm going to report on Friday!

(Lisa dodges the dictionary Barb hurls at her.)

No seriously, I've been getting muse-psychotherapy from Bud, and um, it's starting to work...

[Unique]

Kimi wo suki ni natte durekurai tatsu no kana,
Kimochi fukurande yuku bakari de,
Kimi wa kono omoi hituiteru no kana,
Ichido mo kotobaniwa shitenai kedo,

Yuki no youni tada shizukani,
Furistumori tsuzukete yuku....


Kimchi and sushi are so nattily dookey tasting - not like bananas
If you eat kimchi and candy at the bakery
Your friend Kimi won't come singing haiku and bananas
It will make you more itchy, drive you bananas, **** credo

Yucky no more, young tasting **** Ta Da!
It's the future of tumors! Yucky!

(Strange how things lose their meaning in translation, isn't it?)

Good luck, Kitahoshi! Maybe next time you can be a Valkyrie.

[batyler65]

FRIDAY, OCTOBER 7, 2005

Yes, once again another week has flown by. It's time to stand up and be counted.

This week I did my part for the October challenge (1 sub per week, remember?) by sending out 2 queries, 2 batches of greeting cards, my December column, the final text of my January educational newsletter, a puzzle I intend to mail today and an inquiry into a web writing job for a city guide. I have two query ideas sitting on my desk to churn out today and get sent off (e-queries, so I should have them wrapped up pretty quick).

It has been a busy and productive week here. I've done some more work on a new puzzle book (it's labor intensive, but I am enjoying it), took a couple of stabs at a picture book manuscript I keep trying to sell, and spent a day focused on my humorous gift book project. At current count I have a stack of 18 projects on my desk (counting those two e-queries for today) and it seems like every time I get one accomplished, a new one pops up to take its place. I suspect I may never reach the bottom, and that is okay. I'd rather have projects to tackle than no ideas to work with. I'm going to spend the afternoon communing with my labor intensive puzzle project. Graph paper and colored pencils, here I come!

So, how's by you? Have you done your part for the October Challenge this week? I'm going to sit back and sip my chocolate velvet coffee (heaven!) and wait for you to regale me with tales of your week.

I'm waiting.

Barb

[Honey Nut Loop]

Um well i sent three query letters off on monday and got one reply on wednesday, as you know, asking for a full MS. And i've written 8000 words of a new project.

[Yeshanu]

And what exactly does Ally mean when she says Oook?


The answer, my friends, can be found here:

http://www.absolutewrite.com/forums/showthread.php?p=351172#post351172

[Kitahoshi]

The answer, my friends, can be found here:

http://www.absolutewrite.com/forums/showthread.php?p=351172#post351172

I can't get in. *dies* Oh yeah, reporting. Well, I already told you guys that I was being driven into the ground by life this week. In fact, I did awful at the last rehearsal because I had to study more for my history and German quizzes than learn lines (did I mention my current mark in German in 98? Yeah, I thought it was a typo too).

[Kida Adelyne]

the password is 'vista', Kit.

[Birol]

Thanks, Ally. I wasn't certain what forum your mom was linking to that required a password. I got befuddled.

[Yeshanu]

Sorry about that, Kita.

did I mention my current mark in German in 98?

Where'd ya lose the two marks???? :D

[Kitahoshi]

Sorry about that, Kita.



Where'd ya lose the two marks???? :D

losing half marks here and there like forgetting to make the first letter in nouns capitals (ie. Ich gehe nach Hause.), confusing 'ess-tset' with just 'tset' during spelling tests and confusing the verb to say with the verb to sing. They look a lot alike you know. Ich singe (I sing) und(and) Ich sage (I say). So for one of my questions I messed it up in translating. Instead of Tommy sagt nichts meaning he says nothing, in my world it now means Tommy does not sing. XD

[Kitahoshi]

the password is 'vista', Kit.

Yay! I was mentioned! *dances* I mean it though. You really can keep the dinosaur. It was afraid of the cats.

[gina]

Another busy week on my end. Productive, but I've been in a bit of a writing funk too. I'm going through the I hate every word that comes out phase. It is starting to pass, but slowly. The first week of the month is usually not the best for me anyway, so things should improve as the month progresses.

This week I have:

* Emailed two blogging jobs with queries. Half the time you never even hear back from them. Emailed one on Tuesday and the other earlier.

* Submitted a flash short to an e-zine. Waiting to hear on that as well.

* Kept up with both writing for both my review site and my blog on the media site I work for.

* Word count for the week is 10730.

[Kida Adelyne]

Hullo. This week I spent quite a lot of time trying to come up with an idea for Nano. I finally have one. ^.^ I have the three main characters, a basic plot, and some of the events even. Now I have to wait three weeks:( Oh well.

I also pulled out my Nano novel from last year. I have started to edit it, with the current intention of add 16.5k to it. I think I added around 1-2k this week. Which is pretty good. Hopefully this excersize will make me better at putting some description in my writing (I'm awful at it) so I will actually be able to draw this years novel out to 50k.

Ciao!

-Ally

[scfirenice]

Okay. This week? I have 5,000 new words in the novel, one new story idea, and one article idea. I also made two new subs and got one new rejection. That's it.

Hiya ALL.

[jdkiggins]

Kiggins mountain erupted with real life lava. Sorry I'm late.

October 2 -- wrote 10 pages on Unearthed
October 3 -- 7 pages on Ancestral Promise
October 4 -- (28 pages) 10 pages on Unearthed, 10 pages edited on Roadkill, 4 page column, 4 page article

October 6 -- 2 pages on Unearthed

October 7 -- 15 pages on Unearthed

October 8 -- 3 pages prompt writing
_______________
Total to date: 65

And if I add the 20 pages written in my journal about RL...my total pages written is then 85. :)

Not exactly sure of my total word count this week.

[Yeshanu]

My little notebook is filling up with stories and book ideas and even a few pages on ATTS. I wrote one complete short story, the humourous short on last week's "Once Upon A Weekend" story, and outlined three non-fiction books. I've started doing serious research on one of them, and hope to get a mass-mailing of queries out by the end of the month to satisfy Barb's challenge.

I'd like to sub some of the stuff I've written, but I'd appreciate some crit first. I've posted two in SYW, and one in the Poetry Critique board. Please feel free to be honest about what works and what doesn't.


Short story here, Post #7:

http://www.absolutewrite.com/forums/showthread.php?t=19072

Humourous short here:

http://www.absolutewrite.com/forums/showthread.php?t=19987

A poem here, password "Citrus":

http://www.absolutewrite.com/forums/showthread.php?t=20060

As for "Ally Oook," I posted it in SYW after some thought because the first two paragraphs could definitely start a more general essay on teen/parent communication styles, but I don't know quite where it would go at this point.

[Birol]

Lori to WPR. Lori to W*squelch*. Do you read me? Repeat. Do you *squelch* Over.

If you are receiving this, I am unable to read you. Transmitting report in hopes you will *static* it.

TB*hiss* is currently *squelch* Repeat. *squeal* on hold.

Schoolwork is generating creative interference. Must complete a 15-page *static* (so hard to think in terms of pages instead of word*muffled*), read six short stories, and *squelch* presentation.

Did manage to *hiss* two markets and sub one *squelch* story.

Eager to return *SQUEEEALLL*

[Kitahoshi]

"Oook. Ooooooooooooooohk. Oook oook." (I have exhausted my language ability by writing 2 000 something words for HBU and an old fanfic Cleao's Joy. Please count these to next week... or something. I don't know. It's 1:38AM and the word blockage fell off and all the words came spewing out so fast that I have none left now. I have wait for them to accumulate again. Dangnabbbit- tricks are for kids! Oh dear. It seems I'm running out of ledgible ways to communicate. Weidersehen. [Goodbye])

[Unique]

No words last week

No words this week

I'm going to stop talking, too

[Good Word]

I wrote about 800 words, but I also see the need to cut some of my manuscript, so I am still hovering at around the same count total.

Still, progress has been made, with deep thanks to Bud-the-boozy-muse, that thongy thunderchunk of masculinity.

I have a new bad guy, and a new chapter one!

Lisa

[Jaycinth]

Pulled out and re-wrote two stories, one Horror, one Speculative fiction, and submitted both. Hope to hear back by the end of the year.
Already posted my rejection slip.
Finished re-writing chapt. 12 of 'Parallel Course' , it was easy. The characters are personable and cooperative. I cut out more that I actually wrote...it was more of a sentence re-arrangement.
Chapter 13 of same book. Well. Last week I chased the Evil Adverb Fairy out of it, but the chapter was in tatters. I've tried all week to fix it. I re-wrote then cut the entire thing again. I am sure the problem is my affinity for the characters. They have been heroic and the only way to end this is to screw with their lives. I toyed with it yesterday. and I re-wrote the chapter as an outline.
My tasks this week are to fill in 4,000 to 5,000 meaningful words that will flesh out the outline into a chapter that will upset my tummy, and to scope out two more agents or publishers who are accepting submissions, so I can query 'Sources' Code' again before the end of the year.

[batyler65]

CALLING ALL CARS! CALLING ALL CARS!

This is an all points bulletin!

The following are AWOL from WPR:

Tri
Renee'
Story Girl
CC
Ray
Mac
Allen
Natalia
Matt (and pudding)

We suspect a mass escape attempt. Subjects may be slightly purple and disoriented. They may report being the victim of plane crashes. Subjects must be apprehended for their own well-being.

[batyler65]

HNL

I can tell you already fit right in here. Congratulations again. And Kudos for 8k this week. :) :) :) :)

[batyler65]

GINA

Excellent progress. Are you playing along with our October Challenge? You already have one sub out for the month. Just three more to go. ;)

Keep it up! :) :) :) :)

[batyler65]

ALLY

Alreading planning ahead for November? Is that cheating? ;) I'm glad that you are going to do NaNoWriMo again this year. And I'm happy to see that you have pulled out last year's entry to edit. (Is that Lost ID?) I'd like to see you get more subs out there. How about it? hmm???

Keep writing. :) :) :) :)

[batyler65]

SC

GREAT WORK! 5k new words AND 2 subs! Extra puddin' for you!

:) :) :) :)

[batyler65]

JO

Sorry that RL is erupting. I hope things settle down.

Still, all and all a productive week. 65 new pages plus lots of journaling. I'm glad you kept writing even when life was chaos.

Extra hugs. Don't forget to take care of yourself.

:) :) :) :)

[batyler65]

RUTH
Glad to hear that you are on board for the October Challenge! You seem to be getting back in the swing of things.

I've looked at the Ally Oook sample and think you have some bare bones to work with. Especially from the "becoming my mother" angle. If I get a little time, I'll try and look it over again and offer some suggestions.

I'm not a good person to ask about poetry. Not good at all. ;) Perhaps someone else in here will take a look?

Keep up the good work.

:) :) :) :)

[batyler65]

LORI

*smack*

*smack-smackety-smack*

*smack-smackety-smack-smack*

Testing... test*feedback*... 1..2..3..

Is this thing on? Oh bugger all.

Can you hear me now?

Good going on getting the subs out and the market research. Sorry that life is so hectic. Do what you can, when you can, but don't let TBWN sit for too long. It makes it SO much harder to go back to.

Hang tough.

:) :) :)

[batyler65]

KITA

Get some sleep, kiddo. WTG on the word count. Sounds like you plunged WAY ahead. Of course, for the time being, you seem reduced to telling stories in Baboon-ese, but we will not hold that against you.

More! More! More!

:) :) :) :)

[batyler65]

No words last week

No words this week

I'm going to stop talking, too

UNIQUE

Dearie, dearie me! This sounds drastic.

Take a deep breath. Got it? Good, now let it out. Repeat.

You didn't say if you were blocked, pressed for time, or what exactly caused this sudden stoppage. So I'm playing it by ear, here. Whatever the reason, you need to get those words flowing again. For this, I strongly recommend timed writing. Seriously. Set a timer for ten minutes. Write whatever comes to mind during those ten minutes. You can write "I don't know what to write", that is perfectly okay. But write nonstop for those ten minutes. If your muse snatches up the ball and runs with it, great. Let it happen and keep going when the timer runs out. You might be surprised at how much something so simple can help.

Don't beat yourself up. It happens.

Hugs (but no lashes).

[batyler65]

LISA

W00t! You are moving again. Excellent news! 800 words is 800 words. Whatever you are doing, keep doing it. 15k is on the horizon. You WILL get there. I just know it. (These psychic impulses of mine have nothing to do with that whip.)

Bud sends his love. And puddin'.

:) :) :) :)

[batyler65]

JAYCINTH
Excellent report this week! Two subs for October already -- I love it! Looks like the October Challenge won't be much of a challenge for you.
I love it when characters are personable and cooperative. It's the stubborn, grumpy ones that get on my nerves.

Good luck on fleshing out that outline. I'll look forward to next weekend's report.

:) :) :) :)

[allenparker]

This dear womaN wishes fOr us to reporT eacH week wIth all the eNthusiasm of a drunk cheerleader after prom niGht. Well, I have a report.

I do, I have one. If you look closely you will find the reporT hanging on every word I impart On y'all.

I would dearly love to give this Report directly, but thE Island Spy Monkees keep breaking into my comPuter and erasing my repOrt. Just AnotheR PleasanT Valley Sunday.

May Peter, Mickey, and Davey have mercy on our souls.

Allen

Did I mention fixing dinner for my wife, cleaning the kitchen, and doing the laundry? Report on this outcome will probably be posted in the Rejection thread.

AWP

[maestrowork]

I'm not here. Please leave a message.

[ChunkyC]

The Chech's in the mail. I gave at the orifice.

Actually, filed my column. And I finally got moving again on finishing the revisions on HOME. Made it through 40 pages this morning so far, 60 to go. I don't think I'll get it all done today, but for sure in the next day or so, then it's Query An Agent time, and back to writing HOME AND AWAY.

[triceretops]

All right all ready, I'll slither in here. Having major computer problems--can't get any email--lost my favorites. I'll try coming in the back door like I have. Will perform a complete computer wipe/save sometime in the next two or three days.

Finished the first rewrite 300 pages on Planet Janitor. Man do I hate this stuff. It went okay, actually good, I noticed it was a tighter script this time and did not require major thrashings. I've got to go back in there a second and third time now to get it spot on--not looking forward to this...

I'm dying to start book #3 and I'm beating myself up with a concept/idea to start one. Actually thinking about writing a second edition to my once published non-fiction book just for the damn money and agent. I did send a personal letter to my long lost agent at Richard Curtis, begging her to take this orphan back into the house. It's just too lonely out here. I have to suck up to buck up!

Since I'm denied email shotguning, it looks like I'm going to try and send out some REAL hardcopy queries and synops, and REALLY personalize/target individual agents and publishers. FOR REAL. Gonna see if the snail route snags a better response rate. At this point I don't even know how many requests for 3's or fulls I've had in the past two weeks, so I'm just going to lie slack until I fix the prob.

I think I have a serious case of idea block. I don't even know what genre I want to start next--it's gone from non-fic to YA fantasy to literary. I've got six ideas for plots but they are all running neck and neck with each other.
Very confusing week.

Tri

[Yeshanu]

Since it's still the weekend up here in Canada:

Ally walked into my house this afternoon and said, "Mom, who did you murder?"

It seems the only explanation she could come up with for the sparkling clean floors, countertops, etc. was that I was doing away with the evidence...

I told her, "None. Yet."

Anyhow, I also cleaned my office and re-organized my "mail slots" so that I have a special slot for each major project I'm working on, a slot for the small stuff I've been writing, a slot for idea starters, and a slot for current bills. So I can find things when I need to work on them. What an absolutely amazing concept... :)

Tri, computer problems suck. Hope you're back on line and charging full steam ahead soon... :Hug2:

[batyler65]

Glad you popped in, Tri. I was worried. :)

Hope you get the computer straightened out and find a way to quiet the voices in your head.

:):):):)

[Kitahoshi]

KITA

Get some sleep, kiddo. WTG on the word count. Sounds like you plunged WAY ahead. Of course, for the time being, you seem reduced to telling stories in Baboon-ese, but we will not hold that against you.

More! More! More!

:) :) :) :)

"Oook, Oook ook ooooooky-ook." (Ugh... musical... closing in... as well as Nano Wrimo... *eaten by inanimate objects* Well, there's a while before Nano Wrimo but it makes me frightened to think about it really. Afraid of failing.)

[gina]

GINA

Excellent progress. Are you playing along with our October Challenge? You already have one sub out for the month. Just three more to go. ;)

Keep it up! :) :) :) :)

Not sure if i'll have four fiction subs this month. Slow fiction writer here. Since I also write nonfiction I also count my queries and applications for writing positions as submissions since I am sending them my work for consideration. I also submit my reviews to paying subs from time to time as well. Between both my fiction and nonfiction submissions I might be able to manage four this month.

[MacAllister]

So I've been quite remiss in my weekend updating.

There's a good reason for that. I'm frankly not certain this book is worth rewriting. I'm just not sure it's not fatally flawed, and I'm knocking myself out rewriting something that just isn't gonna fly.

However--when I start thinking that, I think, "Well, heck. It's a good exercise, if nothing else. And, after all, I'm hardly the best person to judge my own writing..."

Then I have the uncomfortable sensation that this odd place I'm at with the farkin' book is not unique to me...what if it's a natural stage of the almost-finished novel? What if what I really need to do is gut it through, and it's going to be okay?

Does any of this sound familiar to you guys?

[Unique]

every single minute - of every single day.


I tried Barb's 10 minute timer idea. It worked.

I had the same four letter word over and over 356 times.

[batyler65]

Yes, this sounds familiar, Mac.

For me, writing a novel was an act of determination. When I sat down to do the rewrites, I knew it had flaws. In fact, I had to recreate the last 150 pages because there were fatal flaws.

In the end, the big question I think, is not whether your book is fatally flawed but rather if you believe in the story enough to want to finish it, even if it means writing the dang thing all over again. Forget writing ability. Forget gutting it out. I suspect that nobody has a love affair with rewrites, and yes, we all suffer from self-doubt. When you get right down to it, you have to decide: Do I LOVE this story? I'm not talking about the mechanics and the plot devices and the structure, I mean the STORY. I would never advocate abandoning something a writer believes in and is still in love with. But the vibe I'm getting here is that you are working on this book because you feel like you should instead of that you want to. If that is the case, it is time to "break up" with your novel and start a relationship with something new.

[As to your argument about rewriting it being good exercise: If the workout becomes tedious, even the avid fitness geek will start avoiding it.]


Hugs

[batyler65]

every single minute - of every single day.


I tried Barb's 10 minute timer idea. It worked.

I had the same four letter word over and over 356 times.

Okay, today's goal: a different four-letter word.

Breathe deep. We only go around once, Unique. You can do this.

[Unique]

Thanks, Barb.

I'm deciding which word to use today.


I was going to ask Mac what it was that was irritating her about her story. Is there a particular character or is it the story itself?

Maybe one of the characters is wanting their own story.

Or maybe you need to put them all under an avalanche - see who can dig their way out and leave the rest to freeze.

I have this blurb on my wall over my desk - I don't remember where I got it - (out of a book - I think it was green - :) - it's talking about style and it says:


"....is it trying to convince? Overwhelm? Help? Seduce? Give pleasure? Or is the aim perhaps to inflict pain?...."

Is your trouble with the 'Why' of the book? That's always my biggest problem.....why am I doing this?

Entertain, persuade, terrify, to make one think - those are good reasons, too.

[Birol]

I guess another way to ask Barb's question, Mac, is: Is this book still inside you?

I know with TBWN, even when I'm convinced it is trite and cliche or I feel completely drained of creative energy and start looking for someone to turn my resignation in to, the characters are still there, whispering to me, wanting to break free.

[ChunkyC]

Does any of this sound familiar to you guys?
Every single time I sit down to write. Just as my document appears on the screen and I hover my fingers over the keyboard, this voice in my head says, "Who the f*** are you tryin' to kid?"

[maestrowork]

I'm feeling that every day, every minute... now that my book is coming out... Holy CRAP! You mean people outside of my circle of friends and family are actually going to read it? What if they think it's crap? Then I realize the first part of the book was written four years ago... ugh, I had no idea what I was doing back then... STOP THE PRESS. STOP THE PRESS. STOP THE PRESS.

... but I've come so far...

Keep swimming... just keep swimming... swimming... swimming... keep swimming...

[scfirenice]

Breathe, Ray. It'll be fine.

[triceretops]

I just lost four pages for you Mac. Dang it. Anyway, hang in there cause we're all fighting those doodlebugs. You need a another believer, and it wouldn't be a bad idea for a beta to give you a straight read through. I think you might be fatigued. Try and recapture that wonderful giddy feeling you had way back there in the begining--that "new car" smell, that flood of inspiration. That's an indicator that you were always on the right track. Heck, you can feed chapters into the Share Your Work thread until you spill the guts of the whole book. We have some really terrific regulars over there, and believe me, they've baste you like a turkey, or break out the riding crop and whip you on.

Sometimes we start out with a gaggle of plot twists and three quarters down the road we've painted ourselves into a corner that's hard to tie up. I get the feeling your a perfectionist, cause this one has been a struggle for you. When I need a ego kick I polish the first three chapters to a brilliant luster then bomb the secondary agents and editors who I call the "incredible expendables." I do this for feedback so I can revamp some problem areas, and also get some nice comments (if any).

My newest phenomenon has been that since both my books are finished, they're acting like snotty-nosed teenagers, flipping each other off, insulting each other. One book thinks its brainy, fleshed out, with lots of neat sub-plots, and the other thinks its a straight forward, no nonsense "man's" book. They want me (as the parent) to choose the "best baby" and I find myself whispering to one of them, "I really like you better than the other one."

So you hang in there, Mac. I KNOW you'll get this puppy going again, cause the gang's all here for you!

Tri

[Kida Adelyne]

:kiss: Awww, Ray. If people don't like it, then phooey on them. People don't pay to publish sucky books. A big :Hug2:, then you go make yourself a cup of coffee or somthing to calm you down.

[maestrowork]

Aww... thanks. I really wasn't trying to garner sympathy. Hugs. I know for a fact that there will be many people who won't read my book no matter how much haggling I'm doing. Then there will be people who read it and hate it. Then there will be people who read it and feel indifferent. Then there will be people who read it and like it. Some may even love it. That's just part of the deal. It doesn't stop me from waking up in a cold sweat feeling all naked and exposed and frightened. But that's part of the deal. To be a writer. If I wanted peace and security and self-validation, I'd have become an accountant. ;)


I was just telling Mac that self-doubt is normal... part of the deal. Even LONG after the book is out. It's part of the writer's psychosis. Embrace it. Swim with it. If you think the book lacks something, reevaluate it and get second opinions, but don't stop and give up so soon. Make it better.

[Yeshanu]

It doesn't stop me from waking up in a cold sweat feeling all naked and exposed and frightened.

Try wearing PJ's to bed... ;)

Mac, I feel that way, a lot, about ATTS. But, like Barb said, the characters are still there, every single day, whispering to me... I don't know if it'll ever be good enough to publish, but I know that I have to make this book the best that it can be before I give up entirely. Other books I've started or thought up just haven't grabbed me that way.

And if you want a beta reader, send me a PM. I'd be glad to give an opinion. (And knowing your writing, it won't be, "This sucks.") :Hug2:

[Birol]

Mac knows I want her to finish this book and that I believe in her writing abilities (at least I hope she does), but to lay my own personal self-interests aside for a moment and come at this question from another angle, experienced novelists often refer to that first book as a "drawer" book. It's a learning experience, and doesn't always see publication. When you're writing your first book, at what point do you say, "This is indeed a drawer novel and I've learned all I can from it" in order to lay it aside and move onto the next, more salable project? More specifically, how can Macallister best determine if her lack of interest in this, her first novel, is just ordinary self-doubt or caused by the fact that she has learned all she can from this experience and it is time to move on?

[MacAllister]

It isn't so much that I don't love the book anymore. It's more like when, for the first time as an adult, you have to make the decision about whether or not it's time to put a beloved pet to sleep.

A book is not a dog, though.

Thanks everyone. I vastly appreciate the input. I'm planning to continue, and muddle through the rest of this rewrite. :)

[maestrowork]

Mac, you're just having rewrite blues...

I remember when I had to lop off 15,000 words (7 chapters). It was like death of a family...

[triceretops]

Mac, you're just having rewrite blues...

I think this is sooooooo true. I'm going through my second major revision on book two and this is really starting to annoy me. Mac, I think it's just page at a time, put in that session, mix and stir, and then repeat. It's always going to be tough.

Tri

[batyler65]

Friday, October 14, 2005

*singing*
It's a beautiful day in the neighborhood...

Well, it IS Friday. I said, FRIDAY!! I SAID... Take your fingers out of your ears, I'm not singing anymore.

It has been an interesting week. My hubby decided to go deer hunting with my SUV. For those of you who don't know, I have a weird love affair going with my vehicle. My husband was forced to wake me at 5:30 in the morning to tell me he had possibly destroyed my bestest ride ever and could I please, please not kill him until after the sun came up? I think he was more afraid of telling me than telling the insurance agent. (In my stupified pre-coffee, what the heck am I doing up at this hour mindset, I decided to let him live. For the moment.)
$5400 in damages later... I might have my vehicle back by the first of November. If the body shop gets the parts in time. (And no, we didn't get the deer meat out of the deal.) We also discovered that the A-coil in our central air unit (new house) is shot. Fortunately we bought a home warranty, so $100 deductible and all will be repaired. Again, waiting on parts. Is there some cosmic law that says: All parts come from Florida? Just curious, because that's where all of these are coming from.

Needless to say, money has been on my mind a bit this week, extra motivation to submit.

I did crank out three submissions this week (all to greeting/slogan companies) *crossing fingers*. That brings my total subs for the month up to nine so far. How are you guys doing with the October Challenge? You only have to sub four. Just four.

I also worked on the humorous gift book I'm trying to pull together out of old column material and funny ideas that didn't quite pan out into something larger. I'd like to get it done in rough form by the end of the year. We will see what happens. I continue to work on a new puzzle book for kids that is art-intensive. At last count, I have 12 of the initial sketches done and am expecting the total number to top out at 36. That is, of course, unless I run out of ideas for what to draw. (Yeah, right. Run out of skill, maybe, ideas, no.) I researched the activities for my March newsletter (I have to write thirteen fun and educational games/activities for the k-5 crowd each month) and am hoping to have the draft version of it completed before the middle of next week. I also sent a flash fiction piece to my crit group for vivisection. We will see what happens in the end.

Hopefully, by next week, I will be looking to get MONSTER back on track and galloping toward a finished third (and final, everybody say "Amen") draft.

So, how goes it in your neck of the writing woods? Funny tales to tell? Drama to impart?

Do tell.

;)

[jdkiggins]

experienced novelists often refer to that first book as a "drawer" book. It's a learning experience, and doesn't always see publication.
Currently all my novels are "drawer" books. :ROFL:
I sympathize with you, Mac. Recently I've dusted off my old manuscripts and have taken on the task of editing and rewriting. I have found that because they've been in the drawer so long I can be more objective and rip them apart as if they weren't written by me. ;)

[jdkiggins]

Oh, FRIDAY! I haven't subbed anything but I am writing with a frenzy.

I've joined a writing marathon at RWA and it was just the thing I needed to get my juices flowing again.

I wrote 60 pages last week and I'm up to 64 this week so far. WOO HOO!
:snoopy: :Jump: Can you tell I'm excited?

[allenparker]

Try wearing PJ's to bed... ;)


Sorry young lady, but I will have to wash your mouth out with soap! The idea of wearing PJ's to bed is just repulsive. Were you raised in a textile factory?

Shame on you. Now take off those clothes and get back to writing....


Allen

[maestrowork]

Amen, Allen. Either T-shirt and shorts for me or nude.

Ahem, back to the report. I am glad to report that this has been my "up" week. Creatively I'm all fired up. I wrote more than 3000 words on CTN in 2 days. Things are moving along. I'm pleased. I just need to learn to step over my hurdles with I'm blocked and write another scene... usually my problem is that I get stuck at a scene when I'm blocked... now I know I should just abandon said "scenes" and move forward...

The rest is the same old same old... column... still waiting on TPB... (Agh! Can 2006 come any sooner?) Doing some marketing stuff (how do you market something that is not available yet?) Am excited about how the Stories of Strength is coming along. Updating my website... thinking about promotional ideas...

[allenparker]

images/icons/icon10.gifimages/icons/icon11.gifimages/icons/icon12.gifimages/icons/icon8.gifimages/icons/icon7.gifimages/icons/icon6.gifimages/icons/icon10.gif

See! That wasn't so bad.

2000 words....
edited 75 pages....
Subbed 9 times....
Rejected a few....
Fought to keep from strangling the local publisher who thought the book was "just right for some other publisher."

Do I get writing credit for writing a short story about the local publisher being run over by a crazy-eyed ex-marine?

Never piss off a humorist. You'll end up being the punchline in one of his jokes.

Allen

[triceretops]

Spent a lot of time backing up, copying and getting ready to burn all files, then wipe the hard drive. Then everything will have to be reinstalled and calibrated like it was before. Major pain.

Did manage to edit 102 pages on the second draft of PJ. Sent out three hard copy synops to agents, including my old agent Curtis. Still don't have a new story idea yet--want to marathon real bad again. Have absolutely no idea what I want to start/write.

Tri

[Jaycinth]

It is not Monday yet, but I am giving up and I will take my beating now, please.

2 weeks ago, I destructed chapter 13. It needed a re-write. Since then I have written and deleted pages of dialogue and pages of narrative. I cannot get it 'right'. I've fed my family from cans, boycotted house work, ignored the cat and sat there with my 'lapdog' and typed and erased ad nauseum. I even tried waking up early trying to catch my muse before work, and in 2 weeks I have four sentences that fit my outline and I am happy with. (Are you all mooning me yet?)

I haven't finished the other short story (3051 Accords). For that one, it is simple. I ran out of brutality; the ending cannot be wishy-washy. One real bad day at work, and I'll finish that with predjudice!

And, because I am stuck up, I don't want to do any more work on book three until I finish that last chapter of book two, because, well, the opening of book three needs to involve the character's feelings at the end of book two, and I won't know how he feels about it until I write it.
********And I can't kill him.
So. I'm putting up now. Maybe before Monday I'll shake this funk and be able to say "Hey I finished the chapter!" but for right now, I'm going to give up, go home, rent a movie of my daughter's choosing (Anime) eat junk food and not stress. Maybe I'll have a beer or a glass of wine.

Thank you for listening to my rant. I will now go back to counting the min. til 5 and freedom!!!!!!!!!!!!

[Good Word]

Well, on one project I wrote 2300 words, cut it down to about 1500.

On my novel, I wrote some, but cut around 600 words of the thing, so it is still hovering around 13,500. When I get to 15,000 I am going to do something really special, like...get to 20,000.

Sheesh.

I was also inspired to write a very rough draft of a children's book, which I have never done before. Not sure if I am going to take that any further, but it's something to report!

Lisa

[Yeshanu]

It has been an interesting week. My hubby decided to go deer hunting with my SUV. For those of you who don't know, I have a weird love affair going with my vehicle. My husband was forced to wake me at 5:30 in the morning to tell me he had possibly destroyed my bestest ride ever and could I please, please not kill him until after the sun came up? I think he was more afraid of telling me than telling the insurance agent. (In my stupified pre-coffee, what the heck am I doing up at this hour mindset, I decided to let him live. For the moment.)
$5400 in damages later... I might have my vehicle back by the first of November. If the body shop gets the parts in time. (And no, we didn't get the deer meat out of the deal.) We also discovered that the A-coil in our central air unit (new house) is shot. Fortunately we bought a home warranty, so $100 deductible and all will be repaired. Again, waiting on parts. Is there some cosmic law that says: All parts come from Florida? Just curious, because that's where all of these are coming from.

Needless to say, money has been on my mind a bit this week, extra motivation to submit.

Barb, (((Hugs))), but I'll need them back. I just banged up ex-hubby's car... Ally said a bad word, for perhaps the first time ever. Anyhow, a bit shaken.

And I was so proud of myself, too. Got about 1/4 of a complete plot outline done on my NaNo project. Did some more research on my non-fic project. Got unstuck on a novel that's been stalled at chapter two for about five years now. (I had a character with a unique voice and a problem, but no real plot or other characters. Now I seem to be developing both.)

Unfortunately, ATTS seems to be stalled for the moment. I'm thinking that I should just leave it until after NaNo, because I really need to start producing new stuff in order to increase my confidence level.

Anyhow, it's not stellar progress by any means, but I've written something every day, and my brain is still working...

(Ally will report Sunday night or Monday, as she's away for the weekend.)

[jdkiggins]

Sorry I'm a day late, AGAIN!

I ended up with 81 new pages this week. I think this might be a new record for me. :D

[Kitahoshi]

"Bricken blackosn. Choosey chumpy flops." (I am slowly regaining the speaking abilites. Very slooooowwwlllyyy....)

"Florgen Splatz moppy flu." (I only got 400 words done this week. *tear*)

"floob shmadst lark!" (But I kicked butt in the musical! Huzzah! Apparently I have a future in musicals. o.O Crazy thespians.)

"Flagar suitz cookiert schnoz." (I saw great horrors backstage. Men who know how to put on their own make up. O.O )

"Schmooo splot klank larmp!" (Don't get any ideas Bud!)

[Unique]

:::Unique slips past the Viking guarding the door:::

ssh - you don't see me, okay?

I started two new stories: 'The Autopsy' and 'Dawno Flaunts Her Argyles'. Must do more research for 'The Autopsy' - the voice in my head let me get half way into it and said, 'Hey, this reminds me of '(insert other person's story name here)'. Dagnabbit. 30 year old memories ought to stay buried.

Three more of my poems were read on local AM station tonight. I hope they don't ask again - I'm fresh out of coherent sentences.

That's it. You can beat me now.

[gina]

Wrote just a bit over 13,000 words between my all my writing endeavors. Heard back on one sub with a rejection. Sent another query out. my fiction muses aren't anywhere to be found this month, so instead of pushing it I'm focusing on my nonfiction. Still adjusting to my schedule with the new writing gig too. So I don't want to stress myself too much! Other than that a pretty quiet but busy week.

[scfirenice]

I wrote about 2500 words in Book 3 and found out I am a BIGGER loser than I suspected. My "perfect" manuscript formatted using a "professionals" guidelines was all wrong and I got a rejection telling me she loved my dialogue and that I was a natural story teller BUT my novel is too familiar and the FORMATING sucked, She didn't say sucked but she might as well have. O well, I have also begun reformatting both of my sucky familiar completed novels. One new sub, one new rejection. The local newspaper did a nice story, picture included, about SOS and your truely.

[Yeshanu]

Sorry I'm a day late, AGAIN!


You're not late until Monday, Joanne.

I got a rejection telling me she loved my dialogue and that I was a natural story teller BUT my novel is too familiar and the FORMATING sucked

Submit something else to her, as fast as you can get it out. She likes your work enough to say positive things about it, and that means that if you keep writing, eventually you'll write something that will fit her criteria. Your writing doesn't suck and you're not a loser at all sc. Formatting can be learned rather easily.

Keep writing book 3, and keep submitting! :Cheer:

[Birol]

I submitted one short story (w/ related market research) and realized how I could write the second scene in TBWN POV #4 in order to capture most of the key elements I want that scene to incorporate, but other than that, I didn't do much writing-related.

Schoolwise, I finished a paper that needed to be turned in on Tuesday, met with my advisor about my thesis and next semester's classes, did lots of thinking about aforementioned thesis, researched several professors' backgrounds in order to see which one would be the best one to approach about sponsoring me in independent study next semester, and worked on getting caught back up in a lit class I'm in.

Oh, and I napped. A lot.

[Dawno]

:::Unique slips past the Viking guarding the door:::

ssh - you don't see me, okay?

I started two new stories: 'The Autopsy' and 'Dawno Flaunts Her Argyles'. Must do more research for 'The Autopsy' - the voice in my head let me get half way into it and said, 'Hey, this reminds me of '(insert other person's story name here)'. Dagnabbit. 30 year old memories ought to stay buried.

Three more of my poems were read on local AM station tonight. I hope they don't ask again - I'm fresh out of coherent sentences.

That's it. You can beat me now.

Dawno Flaunts Her Argyles????!!! This one better get published somewhere, I wanna read it.

[storygirl]

*shuffles through door with a sheepish grin*
Um, I, uh, missed reporting in last week. See, it wasn't my fault. These aliens abducted me and I, hmm, you're not buying it, are you? How 'bout this, I was stranded on an island and there were no computers...no internet.... Still not buying it? Ok, fine. I forgot. Geesh, you're a hard nut to crack.

I also know I said I couldn't start new work until I at least made a dent in my backlog, and I have been revising/editing two older manuscripts of mine (and yes, there are more that I haven't touched in years) and well, then an idea banged on my mind until it leapt through the tips of my fingers and onto the page. So, yup, I have started another book. I also added a rejection to the count on the other thread...and I really can't submit anymore until I change the begininning of the book I'm currently submitting. I need to rewrite the whole dang first chapter...as in delete it and start over, which is on top of the other two I'm still in the midst of revising. Plus, now I've started this new one. So, as you can see, I've got a lot of irons in the fire. So anyway, here's my progress for this last week:
~ edited/rewrote 27,436 words
~ wrote 4001 words in new story

Now, here's my goals for the upcoming week
~ finish editing at least one of the manuscripts I've been rewriting for week, which will be around 50,000 words (I'm hoping to finish the older, more difficult one, the one saturated with mistakes)
~ write at least 5000 words in new story
~ get a rough draft of new beginning for book I'm submitting (which BTW isn't either one of the ones I'm editing)

Ok, that's it for me. Guess I'd better get to work.

[batyler65]

Happy Monday, Folks!







RAY

Woohoo to you, too! You are really cranking out the words on CTN now. I'm glad to see that you finally made it over the hump. Stop worrying about TPB 2006 will get here when it gets here. :) :) :)




ALLEN

Nine submissions! Way to go! And it sounds like you are keeping up with your 2k per week goal. Good for you!. :) :) :)





TRI

Take a deep breath, Marathon Man. Let your brain cool down a bit. I'm sure as soon as the gray matter stops steaming you will get another idea to run with. Editing 102 pages in a week is quite an accomplishment by itself. I'm hoping for that kind of progress later this week with my own work. Glad it sounds like you've got your computer woes under control. I doubt anything is more unnerving to a writer than having the equipment eat your work. :) :) :)





JAYCINTH

Deep breaths. It sounds to me like you might be trying too hard. Allow yourself to write some garbage. Don't obsess over getting it all right on the first try. The best advice I was ever given is: You can't fix a blank page. Write down whatever comes. Worry about making it perfect later. No lashes for you, it sounds like you showed up ready to work, just kept hitting the wall. Go easy. It will come. :)





LISA-LISA

Sounds like your muse is trying to distract you. That is usually a sign that you are on to something. Don't get discouraged. Writing and cutting is all par for the course, you know. 1,500 words. You just need 1,500 words. I'll give you the same advice as Jaycinth. Take a deep breath and allow the words to come. Don't worry about how good or bad they are, just get them down. 1,500 words isn't too much to ask for one week's work. I think by Friday, you can be there. Plus, we really want to have a smiley party. So, humor us, okay? :) :) :)







RUTH

Sorry about ex-hubby's car. Glad that you and Ally were okay, though. As for Ally's first swear *snicker*, did you record it on the calendar or something?

In your writing, it really sounds like you need to prioritize and find a focus. With NaNo coming up you know that all the other projects are going to sit idle during the month of November. I'd recommend picking the one project that is calling to you the loudest now and focusing on that until it is time to start NaNo. Keep writing! :) :) :)





JOANNE

You aren't late until Monday. So feel free to report anytime during the weekend. Excellent progress. 81 pages? 81? Can I have some? Keep up the great work! :) :) :)



KITA

400 words are better than no words. I'd like to see more (because I know you can do it) but realize that you have other things going on in your life. Congrats on the musical success! Maybe you will write a musical next? One about purple primates? On an island? ;) I'm looking for more words from you next week. More, do you hear? :)




UNIQUE Congrats on having the poems aired! That's got to be a shot in the ole morale. Starting two new stories is good, too. I guess I will relent and give you some lashes to keep you happy. ;)http://www.absolutewrite.com/forums/images/smilies/Emotewhip.gifhttp://www.absolutewrite.com/forums/images/smilies/Emotewhip.gifhttp://www.absolutewrite.com/forums/images/smilies/Emotewhip.gif





GINA

Sometimes the fiction muses are like that. Flighty blokes. Sounds like you have everything else under control. The fiction muse will probably come back one you get the new gig down to a routine. Keep the faith. :) :) :)





SC

I can't complain about 2,500 words. I can complain about attitude. Missy, you are NOT a loser (big or otherwise). So you made some formatting errors, if the editor bothered to let you know what the problem was, she obviously saw potential in your work. If she hadn't, she would not have bothered. Trust me on this. Keep your chin up and get back to work. :) :) :)





LORI

No more naps. Napping is for the overwhelmed and under-rested. I'm suspecting you fall into the first category. Instead of napping, take back control. Set yourself a livable schedule and go easy on yourself when things get crazy. I'm glad TBWN is still brewing amidst all the other projects you have going. Keep it on the schedule. And keep subbing. :) :) :)







STORYGIRL

Don't worry about going AWOL. You still made a lot of progress. 4k is a good chunk of words. The rewrite and editing portion of your program seems to be going well, too. Plus, you are constantly keeping and revising your goals. Nothing to be ashamed of there. Find your focus and get that book subbed. We can throw a smiley party for that, and I LIKE smiley parties. ;) :) :) :)

[ChunkyC]

Monday morning report:

Submitted my column.

Reached a point in HOME just shy of the climax where I need to add a scene to resolve a few unresolved-ables and build tension right before the guano hits the impeller. I've been ruminating on that for a few days and trying to find the notes I made a while ago when discussing the new scene with one of my beta readers. I think I remember what I had planned, but am paranoid those notes will contain a sentence or phrase that will go down in history as the most lucid prose ever written and add my name to the roll call of all-time literary giants.

Or it could be a grocery list.

[Kida Adelyne]

:hi:
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[Kitahoshi]

:hi:
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Awwwww....! You weren't ther for me to bully you about not having a litterless lunch! ( *is now a member of the environmental club ang got to wear a name tag that said: Super Hero with a tree on it*)

[batyler65]

CC
You gotta hate those misplaced notes. I've got my fingers crossed that you find them!

:) :) :)

[batyler65]

ALLY

At first I thought maybe you posted the way you did to distract me from poor performance. Then I saw the 2500 words. Good for you! Sorry that you aren't feeling well. Get better!

:) :) :)

[WordSoup]

I'm ba-ack!
Back online, apparently just in time for another hurricane. :Smack:

I have cable internet now, and boy, is this puppy zippy. Somebody tell me... when am I supposed to get up to refill my coffee if I don't have to wait for pages to load?

You'd think I'd have steller progress to report, not having the internet as a distraction. Wrong. After Katrina, I called my boss and told her I needed time off to look for my marbles. I devoured six books and wrote 23 pages in my journal. The journaling was therapy after/between the hurricanes. I had to write all those emotions out of me. I also came to a life-changing decision...
This Yankee is moving back to Indiana! Give me a Good Ole Blizzard anyday. I just need to bide my time and wait for the school year to let out.

Anywho-it's good to be back here at AW, I've been lurking for two days catching up on all the sillyness..didn't realize how much I missed watching Allen dancing naked on the table!

[Birol]

You get one of those insulated thermos carafe thingies and just bring the whole pot of coffee to the computer with you.

[jdkiggins]

You get one of those insulated thermos carafe thingies and just bring the whole pot of coffee to the computer with you.
Oh, yes! Java! I have one of those insulated thermos carafe thingies. They're great! Got tired of running up and down the steps every 15 minutes, so I bought a coffee pot for upstairs. :D
:banana: :Jump:

[maestrowork]

Or just quit drinking coffee.

<running, ducking>

[jdkiggins]

Or just quit drinking coffee.

<running, ducking>
:wag: NEVER!!!!

[WordSoup]

Quit drinking coffee???!! BITE YOUR TONGUE! :Ssh:

[batyler65]

Jen, empty your PM box. I tried to send you a message only to have it barfed back up at me. :)

Barb

[WordSoup]

Oops, sorry, Barb. It's empty now. :o

[ChunkyC]

Hiya Jen! http://www.absolutewrite.com/forums/images/smilies/EmoteKiss.gif

You need a coffeemaker next to your desk, or a pipeline from the one in the kitchen.

PS - Barb, I found the notes and started on the scene. It's one of those where I'm gonna have to do some renovating to make it fit, like putting a bay window in your living room that's twice the size of the old window, but it'll be worth it.

[WordSoup]

Thanks, Chunky - I needed a smooch :kiss:

[Kitahoshi]

Or just quit drinking coffee.

<running, ducking>

infidel! Blasphemer! ... wait. I don't drink coffee. o.O

[MacAllister]

Jen, I've got my office wired and plumbed to put in a little kitchenette this winter--in the meantime, I have a sink and fridge and coffee-maker for JUST that reason!

Sometimes, though, when I don't think I'm going to be on the computer very long, I make coffee upstairs anyway though, then I have to stop and run up the stairs to refill my cup.

I'll get there, though...

[WordSoup]

Mac - you are my hero! Now, how much would you charge to plumb my office when I find a place in Indiana?

I really shouldn't complain about the set-up I have now - My workspace takes up about 1/3 of the kitchen as it is, and I live in a mobile home. It's not a long walk to the coffee pot.

I like that carafe idea, though! Less frequent gets-ups and sit-downs. (And since I'm so easily distracted by other things, like housework, along the way)

:Coffee: Here's to another java-infused morning!

[batyler65]

Friday, October 21, 2005

Hello again, Gang!

Another week has passed us by. Did everyone meet their goals?

It's been a busy week here. I've done 100 pages of rewrite on MONSTER. 56 pages left and it will be done! I am hoping to cross that finish line this weekend.

I put together and subbed the second draft of my February Educational work, wrote a few greeeting cards (no subs this week), had a new acceptance and by this afternoon, will have sent out two invoices. I didn't get to do anything to the gift book this week, but I have brought the total number of sketches for the puzzle book up to 16, the halfway mark. Next week I have four deadlines, so I'm not sure how many of these other projects I'll be able to work on, so cross your fingers that I get this novel out of my hair by Sunday.

Your turn. What's the news?

Barb

[maestrowork]

I'm on vacation right now so I don't expect to get a lot done. ;)

Anyway, apart from the regular gig... I did some research for CTN (you know how I hate about research) and it's quite fascinating, but I realize I really must go to the library and do some serious research, and it's going to be hard to do during vacation. But I believe I have to rewrite part of my story so I can get my facts right. Even though I'm not really writing a historical fiction, I still don't want to just fabricate facts to make up stories about, at least, the major events. But that's okay. Actually I'm kind of excited about the changes because I can actually add some tension and conflict! But I also lose a little in character development concerning one character... so I am a little concerned about that. But I really do need to write that part of the story before I could go on. Also, I think I need to sit down and write a mini-summary/outline of what I've written so far to just everything clear. Right now, everything lives in my head, and it's been working so far. But I think I need to lay everything out to really keep everything straight at this point, now I'm about half way there.

I'm very excited about a short story/novella idea, too. We'll see.

[ChunkyC]

Kewl, Ray! And enjoy the vacation!

Gonna see North Country tonight and write my review this weekend.

I finished the rewrite of HOME. The ending feels much stronger due to suggestions from Mac and the addition of the scene prompted by Ray's crit. Thanks guys! If this ever gets published, you two will be at the top of the acknowledgements page.

Now, to query that certain agent I have in my sights....

[Good Word]

Reporting in to Sarge Barb SIR!

I wrote over 1850 words, putting me at 15,400ish. Can it be true? I made it to 15k?
Wahoo!

[ChunkyC]

15K!!

Whoohoo! This deserves a dancing banana or three!

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[batyler65]

SMILEY PARTY FOR LISA!

WOO-HOO!!!!!

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I knew you could do it! Next stop 20k!

[Good Word]

Aw, shucks.

I love you guys.