When you get through the story too fast...

[zorasaura]

I always get through stories too fast. What should be 60K words will end up 20K words. Any suggestions for adding meat to the action of the story without being too tangential or descriptive?

Thanks!!!!

[Bufty]

If it should be 60k but ends up as 20k that suggests to me it should have been 20k in the beginning.

To have a 60k story one has to have a 60k plot.

[zorasaura]

I dont know. When people see my writing they usually say, "yeah, you should develop this more, you should write more about that..." It seems like my stories are underdeveloped, so I am wondering if there is a technique to help me understand when and how to develop details or internal character change.

[Shadow_Ferret]

My stories come out on the thin side. Not 20k for 60k stories though. My WIP finished the first draft at 47K or so and I'm fattening it up to 70k.

My problem is I have way too much dialog and not enough descriptions and I need to go back and flesh out what rooms look like, what people look like, add detail to certain action scenes... add more scenes to establish certain aspects of different characters...

As far as there being some technique to help flesh out your stories, it's just a matter of taste, I believe. Details I might think are important you might not and vice versa.

What you might really need to look at is tempo of the story. Mine always seem rushed because it's dialog and action and I need to sit back and figure out where to add something that will slow the pacing down and let the reader catch their breath.

[J.S Greer]

Maybe youre the kind of writer that just likes to get the story down as i comes out of you, and adding the texture comes with the second draft.

I always go back and "Flesh" my stories out, looking for the following:


-Is my narrative compelling? Do I bring the reader into my story by using rich yet realistic descrition and dialogue?
-Is my pace too quick or too slow? Where do I need to add/subtract from my story to make it right?
-Is everything clear? Will the reader understand things the way that I meant them to be understood? IF not, how do I fix it.
-Are my characters believable, and have I shared enough about them for the readers to care either way about them?
-How many redundant words/phrases have I used?


That usually sees me cutting quite a bit, but at the same time adding some too.

[NeuroFizz]

Give your main character additional challenges that run through subplots. These usually require introduction of additional characters, or elaboration of existing ones. They also can significantly enrich the story, particularly if the subplots weave in and out of the primary story arc. Sometimes, a subplot or two will actually change the original outcome of the story.

[icerose]

It sounds like you don't have enough plot. You need plot, events, subplots and so on. Go and read your favorite books and do a bullet list of all the events it took to get from beginning to end. Then go through your story and do the same. You will probably end up with a really short list for yours and be surprised about how much they really did in that book.

[J.S Greer]

Some stories will only go so far, length wise.

I think finding another story that has more to tell is better than adding things to what youve written just for sake of its length.

[citymouse]

I dont know. When people see my writing they usually say, "yeah, you should develop this more, you should write more about that..." It seems like my stories are underdeveloped, so I am wondering if there is a technique to help me understand when and how to develop details or internal character change.

Z, try this. After you finish a chapter take time to see if you need to add any of the five senses. Most of us are good at seeing and then comes hearing. But touch, smell and taste easliy slip by. Adding phrases that explore these can add not only depth but those extra words to your WIP.

But be careful. I read one fellow who described the coppery taste of a victims blood without telling us how it got into his mouth. As has been observed, the devil's in the details.
Good luck,
C

[janetbellinger]

I always write the active parts of the plot first. I like to get all the important happenings down then I go back and develop the scenes, characters etc. which increases word count.

[alices]

I do exactly the same thing as Janet. Also I must do a hard print and read it aloud. (red pen in hand ;) )
There is no way I can edit/rewrite from the screen.

[zorasaura]

You know Alices, I think I will try that. It might help me out. I think my attempt at 90k is finishing out at around 50K. I'm not done yet, but I only have a few scenes left.

[PeeDee]

Remember that even in fast scenes, you the writer need to stop and look around. Otherwise, if everything's blurring past you too quickly, it's going to do the same thing for the reader.

Don't be afraid to babble. If it's good, it stays, if it stucks, then you re-write it unto death.


Welcome to the forums too. Glad to have you. :)

[Alex Bravo]

What I like to do is look at all the pivitol sequences in the novel, maybe even pivitol items and then try to weave them in at least one more time earlier in the novel. Isn't their a saying that if you describe a sword on a mantel it darn well better be used later on in the novel? Well, if I have a sword used at the end, I figure out ways to have it placed earlier on, maybe even several times, so that when it does appear, the reader doesn't feel it was contrived or just convenient. Doing that will add to your story.

[J.S Greer]

Hard copies help a ton when editing. Here is a cool link to a article written by someone on how they edit. I like it. ;)

http://www.hollylisle.com/fm/Articles/wc2-4.html

[Mr. Funktastic]

Hrm. I've never had this problem. I actually suffer from the opposite problem: writing much more than I originally intended. My current WIP started as an 80k word project, but now it's 150k, and I'm not even finished... *sigh*

Anyway, yeah... You can probably beef it up a bit when you form the second draft. Look for anything that you feel is lacking, that could use more. That, or that work could really just be a 20k project. Perhaps you overestimated.

Best of luck with this.

[Doctor Shifty]

I'm going to have a bit of a guess here that it might help you to do some reading in the "show, don't tell" area.

The essence of "show, don't tell" is that you can tell a story very quickly if you leave out a lot of stuff. But you can't show the story like that. The showing demands more than the telling. Telling, when taken to it's natural conclusion, gives you a synopsis.

Imagine this - write the Da Vinci Code out as a single paragraph synopsis. (Pick another book in your own mind if you wish - I picked this because of the extent of fine detail that the plot needs.) Now write it out as a single page synopsis. Now write it out as a ten page synopsis. Now do it for fifty pages, then one hundred. Keep going until you are copying the book word for word.

Out of all these imagined manuscripts, where does your book fit?
What does it need to get it to full strength?
What limitations have happened in your head to make it the length it is?

You will probably not be able to answer these questions straight up, but reading around the "show, don't tell" stuff that google will find for you will help you towards the answers.

[J.S Greer]

Hrm. I've never had this problem. I actually suffer from the opposite problem: writing much more than I originally intended. My current WIP started as an 80k word project, but now it's 150k, and I'm not even finished... *sigh*


Im at about 132k and have 3 chapters left to write. I feel your pain!

[Zolah]

You're probably not showing enough. I sometimes get frustrated during a really intense, emotional scene when the author whizzes through. For instance, in 'Alanna' by Tamora Pierce, Alanna's first swordfight (after she has been practicing, drilling and struggling to improve her swordwork for months) last about half a page. We're told a barebones account of the moves and countermoves of Alanna and her opponent, and that's it. Tamora Pierce would never make a rookie mistake like that now. In a scene which is really intense and important we want more - more action, more description, more reaction. We want to know how it smells, tastes, feels, to be in that moment, and we certainly want more than half a page.

Don't just tell us what happens. Show it happening. Show how it feels. Show how the important characters react to it happening. Make it BIG. Milk it for all it's worth. An you'll suddenly find that a formally well written but not terribly exciting page of writing jumps to life in front of you - and doubles in length.

[TrainofThought]

I’m guilty of it and here is another thread that discusses the same problem http://www.absolutewrite.com/forums/showthread.php?t=42738&highlight=Cutting+down.:)