What is the worst mistake you discovered in revision?

[Prawn]

Stealing an idea from Oliveman's worst line thread...

What is the worst mistake you ever discovered in revision? I just completed my first novel, and here are some mistakes I found:

I had the characters walk up the same hill twice.

I described the undercover plainclothes police officer whom I then had wearing a badge and a peaked uniform hat.

I had lots of people magically getting up when they hadn't sat down.

I had a chapter-long frantic search for a girl...who had a cell phone on her the whole time. Why didn't anyone call it? Why didn't she call for help?

I spent a long time describing in detail a character's crawl through a tunnel, and then remembered that he had left his flashlight outside and couldn't see a damn thing.

Lots and lots of people "narrowed" their eyes. I cut it down to three or four in the whole novel.

What stupid things did you catch in revision?
Prawn

[aadams73]

I had my main character acting on something she hadn't yet learned.

[Serenity]

I had a character apparently lose two years of her life in the span of three chapters.

I don't know if that's the worst, but it's the one that comes to mind.

[triceretops]

I had a captain who was insanely in love with his busted down intergalactic space freighter. He would get upset when any of the crew insulted it and called it his "flying oil refinery." Yet when he crash-lands on a planet, shredding his ship to pieces, he doesn't react at all or throw a fit as a result. Totally out of character!

Tri

[PattiTheWicked]

I had a character do a bunch of things on Saturday, and then get up the next morning and comment about how "tomorrow is Sunday". Somehow there was a warp in the space-time continuum.

[illiterwrite]

My worst: I had two characters getting married in a civil court in a certain province in the late sixties. This one persisted right up until nearly the galley stage, when I discovered it would have been impossible for my characters to do this (there WERE no civil marriages until a year later, apparently).

[Garpy]

I got the wrong calibre for a weapon, and that was in the Hardback edition. The paperback's due out soon with that corrected...phew.

[triceretops]

I have a planet called Nester in the habitable zone of the sun Aldebaran. It's quite impossible for this, since Aldebaran is a red dwarf and couldn't support a planet with life on it.

tri

[FergieC]

The first chapter of my new one had my teenage characters, travelling in two cars and communicating by mobile (cell) phone. Which was great, except that it was set in 1995. On the re-write, I had to start texting friends asking when they first got a cell phone - none had them back then.

Back to the drawing board on plot progression...luckily it was discovered on an early re-write, not after the whole book was finished!

[Arkie]

Inconsistent voice and style caused by reading too much while I'm writing. I am a chameleon writer and pick up other writer's styles. When I go back and look at several chapters, I've got a patchwork that looks like Annie Proulix's half sentences; Elmore Leonard's screen-writing style; Cormac McCarthy's stream of conciousness; James Lee Burke's swamp descriptions. In other words, I've got a damned mess.

[seun]

I forgot about one character entirely in the middle of a scene featuring a few people. She popped up again a chapter later and nobody asked her where she'd been.

I gave two unrelated characters the same surname.

A bloke working in a record shop started working through a stock delivery which hadn't arrived.

In the same book, a few characters go for an after work beer. A colleague tells them he'll be there later. They get to the pub and he is waiting for them.

[sfecphory]

I consistently forget character names. They will change 2, sometimes 3 times by the end of my first draft.

[MidnightMuse]

I've had a character's tattoo change which hand it was on. I've had them sit down several times without having stood up inbetween. And I've had the spelling of a name change from the beginning to the ending of the story.

And once, I missplaced an entire planet.

[Anonymisty]

My character sailed from one island to another in three days, but several chapters later made the same journey (under the exact same weather and wind conditions) in a few hours.

[victoriastrauss]

In a book with several groups of magical adepts, two of the groups had somewhat similar names. For an entire chapter, I referred to one group by the name of the other group.

I discovered this in page proofs. Neither my beta readers, nor my editor, nor the copy editor, had caught it (nor had I, over the course of several revisions).

Also spotted by me in page proofs, for another book: a minor character whose name changed about halfway through.

- Victoria

[seun]

And once, I missplaced an entire planet.

Look down the back of the sofa. If you lose something, it always turns up there.

[MidnightMuse]

Look down the back of the sofa. If you lose something, it always turns up there.

Oddly enough, I found it in the dryer with my other sock :D

[Mr. Funktastic]

I changed a character's hair color/length about three times. He stared as a redhead with long hair, then went to short brown hair, and then ended up with curly blonde hair.

[jbal]

I had a character sit down when they were already seated. That's not bad though. The worst was I had a character whose husband was missing and presumed dead for several days. And in that time, nobody bothered to call anyone in his family or anything. Shocking, glaring oversight. And the worst part is, I didn't catch it on the second draft, my wife caught it. That was a head-slapper, and a good argument for waiting a bit longer before revising.

[TrainofThought]

I had my main character’s hair curly in one chapter and straight in another. The worst thing in revisions was ‘telling’ instead of “showing’. Now I’m going through another revision because of my chatty self.

[ChaosTitan]

Worst? Hmm, here's a couple, I'll let you judge. ;)

*Consistently changed a character's eye color from brown to blue to brown again.

*Changed a character's last name mid-manuscript and didn't even realize it.

*Changed the time of year mid-manuscript from spring to autumn. The first half of the book talked about warm spring days, the last half about chilly fall winds.

*Forgot to resolve a major sub plot (in my head I knew what happened, I just forgot to inform the reader).

[Saint Fool]

erm .. My first sort-of-at-least-for-me-explicit sex scene. My male lead would have needed three arms and no one, not even an Indian contortionist, could have ended up in the position that my lusty virginal heroine did. Not to mention that clothing in the 1700s was not exactly flingable.

And I had a main character disappear halfway through a novel. She just "exited stage right" and never came back.

[underthecity]

I've just begun revisions for my novel which I completed in October, so I'm not that far into finding all the mistakes.

But a few I introduced as I wrote the first draft:

I didn't put the family cat into the story until midway through. His name started as Max, then later became Pumpkin. His fur color also changed from black (at the beginning) to orange later on.

The street the main characters live on changed names.

I think two of the secondary characters may have switched names at least once.

I know there'll be a lot more.

allen

[blacbird]

Starting in the first place.

caw

[TheIT]

Switching a conversation from the characters talking while riding horses to later in the evening when they were in camp, but missing a couple of horse references. My beta reader wanted to know how the horses fit in the tent.

[jpserra]

Two unended and non-continuous threads of conversation. Result of removed text.

John

[greglondon]

Started the story waaaay too early. had to cut a lot to fix that.

A decided lack of understanding of Point Of View, which basically requires a laborious rewrite to fix.

[Chasing the Horizon]

I haven't even gotten around to reading half of what I've written so far, but here are a few of the worst I've caught on my first pass.

I'm writing a trilogy and I write out of order. For an entire chapter I forgot which book I was writing and had all the scenes involve a ship which the characters don't get for another ten chapters.

I have a number of scenes that take place in the same room. And every single time the furniture is arranged differently, into the most convenient format for that scene. I finally sketched the entire room and pinned the paper to my wall. No-one rearranges the furniture that much!

One of my characters complained about how they were out of torches, then the next scene she lit a torch.

One of my characters stepped in front of the other. The next sentence had her standing behind him holding his arm.

I seem to have a magnetic attraction to the words 'quite' and 'rather'

Somewhere in the middle of the first book I seem to have misplaced an entire action subplot. It starts, then just disappears.

[Elektra]

Inconsistent voice and style caused by reading too much while I'm writing. I am a chameleon writer and pick up other writer's styles. When I go back and look at several chapters, I've got a patchwork that looks like Annie Proulix's half sentences; Elmore Leonard's screen-writing style; Cormac McCarthy's stream of conciousness; James Lee Burke's swamp descriptions. In other words, I've got a damned mess.

I do the same thing! I actually have to stop reading the entire time I'm writing anything (or direct it, so that, if I want an Austen-ish feel for example, I'll read Austen before I write).

But I think my worst was when I had my MC gear up to face Cerberus, have two conversations about it, check to make sure she had everything to face him right before she entered the Underworld--and then I forgot to write Ceberus in.

[AnneMarble]

What a great idea for a thread! :D

My mother once pointed out that I had a character throw the kitchen into the trash can. ;) (He was supposed to be carrying an empty soda can!)

My second novel was a suspense novel that had several cops as secondary characters. When I reread it years later (which was difficult as it was written in longhand in a wire-bound notebook), I realized that I had written a couple of cops who appeared in at least a couple of scenes (with backgrounds and everything) and then ... Never. Showed. Up. Again. Whoopsie. :D

I found the funniest ones when rereading an SF novel I'd written years ago. I'm not sure if I stopped in the middle of changing a character , but halfway through, one secondary character, Athena, changed from being an artificial construct to being a human guard who had a brother named Wolter who lived on the planet they were orbiting. But when she went down to the planet to visit the guy, the heroine referred to Athena having a tryst with Wolter! Ewwww. From SF to V. C. Andrews in one easy step.
:roll:

I took that as a hint that I really didn't have a handle on Athena's personality. ;) In fact, if I ever rewrite this novel, I'll probably remove her entirely. Or maybe I should make her a psychotic artificial construct that thinks she's a member of the Dollanger family. :tongue

[Stacia Kane]

I've had characters completely change personalities.

I've had people come in out of the pouring rain, then later go outside and sit down on the dry ground.

Minor characters have changed their names, yes.

I had a hero with a disappearing leg wound--it was there, then it was gone, then it was there again.

I've had people acting on knowledge they weren't yet given.

[alleycat]

I once wrote a short story where one of the main characters was named Brian. I had a couple of people read it and they pointed out a couple of typos (as I expected). Then a third person read it and pointed out I had mistyped Brian as Brain not once but twice. I guess whenever I or others were reading the story our own brain got so used to seeing the name Brian that we didn't notice when it was spelled Brain. "Oh, my God," said Brain.

[FergieC]

I once had a character called Mark, and decided to change his name to Jon instead. I did a replace on word without thinking about the implications, and without ticking the whole word only box. For ages afterwards I kept finding characters who "rejoned", shopped at "jonets", worked in "joneting"...it was an endless nighmare.

[Atlantis]

In my first "novel" that I did when I was 12 years old I forgot one of my character's hair colour. She started off blonde and ended up with strawberry curls at the end of the novel. I now keep lists of hair and eye colours for all my characters so not to repeat the same mistake again. Those little details do slip past me sometimes.

[Elektra]

I once had a character called Mark, and decided to change his name to Jon instead. I did a replace on word without thinking about the implications, and without ticking the whole word only box. For ages afterwards I kept finding characters who "rejoned", shopped at "jonets", worked in "joneting"...it was an endless nighmare.

Is it okay to find this hilarious (don't we all just love computers)?

I did the same thing, on a much smaller scale. I used the name Menelaus as a fill-in until I could figure out the character's real name. When I did a search and replace, I forgot that all the possessives (which had been Menelaus') now needed an extra s. There were just random and seemingly arbitrary apostrophes after the guy's name, and the sentences didn't make sense.

[hnh]

I have a bad habit of calling my characters by the wrong names. In one scene, Becky's boyfriend pulls her down onto his lap and kisses her. But instead of writing "Tim," I called him "Amy," accidentally creating a moment that was both homosexual and incestuous, because Amy is Becky's sister. And Amy wasn't even in the scene at all, so I must have been completely out of my mind that day.

[WildScribe]

Starting in the first place.

caw

You're so hard on yourself!!

[WildScribe]

I've had a character wander into one story from a completely different novel. They weren't even the same genre! Makes you wonder how they all knew each other!

I've also switched a set of parents. My MC's parents were (for example) Joan and Joan and her boyfriends' were Ross and Amy. By the end, the MC was talking to her boyfreind's mom, Joan. Huh?

And of course there are always the mysterious people who can sit without having stood up or stand without ever having sat down. Cool talent, but not in a novel.

[AnneMarble]

My worst: I had two characters getting married in a civil court in a certain province in the late sixties. This one persisted right up until nearly the galley stage, when I discovered it would have been impossible for my characters to do this (there WERE no civil marriages until a year later, apparently).
When the first few episodes of "The Fugitive" TV show were produced, Dr. Richard Kimble was supposed to come from Beloit, Wisconsin -- not from Stafford, Indiana. But then the producers learned that Wisconsin at that time had no death penalty! Whoopsie! As the Doctor was on death row, that required a change of state. (Producers realized viewers wouldn't be as interested in a character who was trying to escape life in prison.) However, in an early episode, if you look closely at the wanted poster, you can see Beloit, Wisconsin on the poster. :D

[Sean D. Schaffer]

To name only a few...

I made the mistake of submitting a work when it wasn't done. (I had only finished the 2nd draft.)

Head-hopping has been my bane for years.

Changing hair color.

Forgetting and/or misspelling character names... that I made up.

I think in one manuscript I wrote about someone standing up when they were already standing.

In an Erotica piece, I used the wrong anatomical features for an important part of the body.

[BruceJ]

I forgot about one character entirely in the middle of a scene featuring a few people. She popped up again a chapter later and nobody asked her where she'd been.

I gave two unrelated characters the same surname.

A bloke working in a record shop started working through a stock delivery which hadn't arrived.

In the same book, a few characters go for an after work beer. A colleague tells them he'll be there later. They get to the pub and he is waiting for them.

Actually, that last one may have some potential to it!

[MHanlon]

I had a character eating dinner in a shirt, but when I read it back he was eating at a diner in shit.

[kwwriter]

Misspelled Lacey, Lacy

Standing one minute, sitting the next

Not "tieing up" a loose story thread satisfactorily

[engmajor2005]

I had a character introduced to another character twice, which would've been fine had the MC suffered from short-term memory loss.

I had a character walk into the master bedroom, only to fall asleep in the spare bedroom.

Those two pop out like neon lights, but I'm sure there are more.

Oh so much more...

[engmajor2005]

That's it, I want to see a novel composed entirely of characters that can sit without standing and stand without sitting!

[WildScribe]

You should read my book, then ;)

[alaskamatt17]

Realized after three books and almost 350,000 words that I have the wrong main character for my story, and that by changing who the main character is I will also have to change his relationship to the eight other major characters.

[Oddsocks]

I've only really just started this story, but I've already found characters named names that are not linguistic possibilities in their native language (I invented their language after having named them, and it's a real problem since I'm used to their names now).

[Riddler]

My main character changed lanes without using his blinker, then blatantly let the coffee dispenser run long after the 2/3 mark despite clear instructions otherwise. Then he threw his neighbor's garbage bags on his roof because that guy had it coming.

[Mark Lazer]

Not too bad, but my villain took out his gun slapped someone in the face with it and took out his gun. Hmm...

[Willowmound]

I have a bad habit of calling my characters by the wrong names. In one scene, Becky's boyfriend pulls her down onto his lap and kisses her. But instead of writing "Tim," I called him "Amy," accidentally creating a moment that was both homosexual and incestuous, because Amy is Becky's sister. And Amy wasn't even in the scene at all, so I must have been completely out of my mind that day.

Hmm.... Freudian. :gone:

[travelgal]

This thread is a hoot!

Hmm... late in my book I have my MC not use his mental powers to warn his people about an impending attack. I forgot he had them!

Tenses. I screw them up, and I'm an English teacher! Oh, and I mess meaning/spelling up with similiar looking words. I'd write 'dignify' when I meant 'dignity'.

Head-hopping. Starting too early. The usual suspects.

[seun]

I described a bald man as having hair that looked 'scruffy'.

[Prawn]

I have a bad habit of calling my characters by the wrong names. In one scene, Becky's boyfriend pulls her down onto his lap and kisses her. But instead of writing "Tim," I called him "Amy," accidentally creating a moment that was both homosexual and incestuous, because Amy is Becky's sister. And Amy wasn't even in the scene at all, so I must have been completely out of my mind that day.

I am certain that this book would sell!

[pepperlandgirl]

I have to be careful because there are certain words that sound the same to me, even though they don't sound the same at all. I mean, I mix up break and brake, but that could almost be understandable. Manner and matter? Met and meant? Then and than? Not so much. Apparently just being aware of the problem is not enough to stop it.

[Elektra]

I have to be careful because there are certain words that sound the same to me, even though they don't sound the same at all. I mean, I mix up break and brake, but that could almost be understandable. Manner and matter? Met and meant? Then and than? Not so much. Apparently just being aware of the problem is not enough to stop it.

May I ask if you have ADD? It's only that, this happens to me a lot, too. I'll get distracted halfway through writing a word, and then my subconscious just takes over and finishes the word however it feels like

[BruceJ]

I have a major character biting into a pomegranate half. Ever done that? I thought I had and remembered it correctly, but must not have. What a mess!

The things you wish you could change...

[pepperlandgirl]

May I ask if you have ADD? It's only that, this happens to me a lot, too. I'll get distracted halfway through writing a word, and then my subconscious just takes over and finishes the word however it feels like

I've never really thought about ADD before, though that would explain a lot...

[farfromfearless]

I discovered that my writing was actually quite terrible at the beginning and only until I got through the first quarter of rubbish did I find any improvement. I of course revised the bloody thing.

EDIT: I guess my mistake is really thinking I could actually write LOL!

[Matt McKee]

I had a minor character mad with grief at the death of his wife and children during the invasion of the Normans. Later, he dies in a duel and the lord meets with the tearful (and apparently undead) widow and kids to express his condolences.

[Higgins]

I had a captain who was insanely in love with his busted down intergalactic space freighter. He would get upset when any of the crew insulted it and called it his "flying oil refinery." Yet when he crash-lands on a planet, shredding his ship to pieces, he doesn't react at all or throw a fit as a result. Totally out of character!

Tri

He was relieved to be rid of it and all the defenses earlier were purely defensive...I mean he felt really defensive about the crap ship...

[janetbellinger]

Probably having a man with a slipped disc cavort on the sofa with his wife. I still haven't figured out how to solve that one - take out the sex scene or the slipped disc. Does anybody know if it's possible to perform sexually while suffering from a slipped disc in the back?

[Cassidy]

i sent my characters to high school on a saturday, a teacher changed sex half way through the book (possible in itself but no one noticed... myself included), a dead father miraculously reappeared, kids asked for coke instead of a Coke. oh.. and characters have commented on the expression of a character standing on the other side of a closed door, stepped out of moving vehicles, and had all kinds of continuity problems!

[farfromfearless]

Probably having a man with a slipped disc cavort on the sofa with his wife. I still haven't figured out how to solve that one - take out the sex scene or the slipped disc. Does anybody know if it's possible to perform sexually while suffering from a slipped disc in the back?

Refrain fron gyrating.

[badducky]

I call them "Third arm" problems. Character picks up teacup with one hand and holds a dog's leash with the other. Character pulls out cigarette. Character uses a lighter.

Hey... How many hands is that?

[badducky]

Probably having a man with a slipped disc cavort on the sofa with his wife. I still haven't figured out how to solve that one - take out the sex scene or the slipped disc. Does anybody know if it's possible to perform sexually while suffering from a slipped disc in the back?

That's a question for a pharmacist. What are the drugs, and how do they interact?

[Chumplet]

I had my protagonist feed his dogs by tipping the plate of leftover eggs into the dogs' bowels.

[Elektra]

Chumplet! Welcome to AW!

[Willowmound]

I had my protagonist feed his dogs by tipping the plate of leftover eggs into the dogs' bowels.

Skip the middleman, eh? ;)

[Chumplet]

Hi, Elektra! I knew you'd eventually find me.

[Elektra]

Muahahahaha

[johnzakour]

I had my character button up his t-shirt. Doh!

[P.H.Delarran]

Probably having a man with a slipped disc cavort on the sofa with his wife. I still haven't figured out how to solve that one - take out the sex scene or the slipped disc. Does anybody know if it's possible to perform sexually while suffering from a slipped disc in the back?
Yes it's possible. The right drug (something that doesn't cause impotence) and put her in control.
Or he could instead have a bulging/inflamed disc rather than a slipped one. Still painful, but less limiting. (my ex had one for years, well forever really)

[Willowmound]

The right drug (something that doesn't cause impotence) and put her in control.


Sounds like fun, slipped disc or not.

[zorasaura]

I did a lot of head hopping on my first manuscript. But I no longer do this.

[Oliveman]

nice! this is more like it :) Sadly I have nothing more to add, since I'm only one chapter in, although I did have the same character "smile curiously" twice in a page.

[TrickyFiction]

The worst mistake I think I've discovered is three chapters of pure backstory. Blech. That, and the writing itself. I try to think positively about it though. I mean, if I can recognize it now, it must be because I've improved. Right? Yeah, that's it. :)

[Sean D. Schaffer]

One mistake I do not believe I mentioned, is the fact I write so many five-page info-dumps into a majority of my works that they are incredibly difficult and boring to read.

I have only recently applied knowledge of the evils of massive info-dumps to my writing at all. It scares me that it took me 24 years of being an aspiring writer before I ever knew about this mistake in much of my writing.