A Neat Trick In the Editing Phase For Anyone

[John61480]

(*Disclaimer* This is only a suggested trick. I'm not reinventing, teaching, preaching or anything. It is just something I did, maybe you do it too but no one talks about it because it's a normal thing. So if you think it is worse than hogwash, I've already taken a seat in it.)

In the past few days, I was going over previous projects I had worked on. I was taking some time away from outlining. My goal was to figure out some of the problems with my writing. I was using the first few chapters of a heavily edited project. Many edits. And still it wasn't enough until I happened upon this final thing to help make that project shine. (Okay, okay, maybe that sounds too optimistic. Read further for details.)

I was lying back in bed, paper held up and a pen ready to mark. Page after page went by. I was busy reading and trying to figure out what was wrong. For some reason, who knows, I just started marking things I thought were well written. Nothing fancy. Just passages that kept my eyes on the page. Well, as it turned out, I set the papers down and looked at them. Viola! I now had all the stuff I was looking for wrong with my work. Which were the parts I didn't circle.

I read my manuscript as a reader, not a writer, and pushed through sentences and paragraphs that were hurtful, distracting and questionable. But I didn't mark them. Instead, every now and then when I came to a paragraph, or a even a page of writing that glued my eyes to the words written and gave me a hint of visualization, I would circle and mark it in varying degrees between good, excellent or okay.

I did not note individual sentences. I did not note a individual dialog here or a descriptive flowery word. I only marked paragraphs or dialog in chunks.

Because as a reader, I wasn't concerned with the tiny aspect. I was reading for the totality of it. The longer my eyes followed the lines of words without interruption, the better.

But don't get me wrong. I wasn't circling cool plot tricks, or things that stood out like eye candy. I only circled stuff that I as a reader would not stumble over in written text. It still is hard for me to describe and others might say, "Well I like a lot of what I write anyway. I still can't tell." I have no clue how to describe how to read otherwise.

But it worked for me. I just thought I would try and share an alternative. It certainly wouldn't make up for any other types of standard editing rules.

So for your heavily edited work, the stuff that you just have an ache in your stomach about but can't see anything else wrong, the sum of what I'm saying is: try adding up your good parts. This helped reveal places where I fell short. And unfortunately, I fell short in a lot of places. If the adjustments on the stumbling parts are made to match the well written circled parts, the next read through could end up being your final reading!

Things I learned in my manuscript writing are found in the same work I shared over on the SYW board.

1) My sentences are too jammed packed with stuff.
2) Organization between character interactions are jumbled.
3) What I had written in that entire manuscript reads like a shopping list of things happening, about to happen or of what happened.

I got the embarrassed feeling when I found these out. I'm glad I chucked it. Useful learning stuff.

And I hope great stuff goes well for you all in your writing progress. Sheeya, like you guys really need that.

[Oberon]

John, I think you have something there on two levels. You identified parts that didn't measure up, but instead of looking for them and agonizing about them, you identified the good parts, the positive elements that encouraged you. It's a good feeling, makes toning up the rest of it less of a chore. I hope.

[John61480]

Yeah, I guess that's the idea.

The good circled stuff alerted me to what was wrong with the other stuff. At first, I was going to re-type the good circled stuff as a list of how to write certain things. I was happy I wrote great examples to myself that I wanted to follow. My original plan was to duplicate the success.

What I circled that was so good was stuff that screamed to me that is how it should be written in publishable form. That's why it was so significant. They were very different from everything else that I had written in the "wrong" way. Which was the list of things I found wrong in my writing I have listed in the original post.

[wayndom]

Sounds like you're on your way to being a real writer (and if anyone thinks I'm going to define "real writer," dream on...).

Now a suggestion you've probably heard before, but should always consider:

When you look at the uncircled parts of your MS, try to cut as much of them as you possibly can. In fact, cut things you think should stay in. Just re-save the MS with a different name, so you still have the original in case of night terrors.

Long-ish but valuable story: The director's cut of Terminator II is about ten minutes longer than the studio release. As James Cameron explains, the cut parts were all expository scenes that he thought were necessary for audiences to understand how and why this terminator is different from the first. But, Cameron admits that when he saw the studio version, it moved faster and he didn't miss any of the cut scenes. In his own words, it goes to show how little needs to be said to tell a story.

This is one of the most valuable lessons a writer can learn.

I lucked out in that regard -- I worked as a radio news reporter for four years before writing my first novel, and radio news is the most condensed form there is. A one-minute story is like an eternity on radio. So for the first two years or so, I'd write a story, then go over it and cut anything I could to fit it into the forty-second slot allotted for it.

At the beginning of my news career, I might have written:

"Portland Police chief Joe Bloe called a press conference at the downtown Hilton this morning to announce that he's resigning his post, effective immediately."

After a couple of years, the same story would go:

"This morning Portland Police chief Joe Bloe announced he's resigning, effective immediately."

When I'm having trouble paring down troublesome sentences or paragraphs in fiction, I imagine I'm telling the story orally to someone in the room with me, and transcribe what I've said. That usually keeps things tight. Your mileage may vary...

[Bartholomew]

"Portland Police chief Joe Bloe called a press conference at the downtown Hilton this morning to announce that he's resigning his post, effective immediately."

After a couple of years, the same story would go:

"This morning Portland Police chief Joe Bloe announced he's resigning, effective immediately."


In certain contexts, the first sentence would be more appropriate.

[Scrawler]

try adding up your good parts. This helped reveal places where I fell short.

Interesting idea. When I feel I'm done, I'll try this!

[Danger Jane]

Cool man. I'm totally doing this.

[JEMcGee]

Great idea! Thanks for sharing. :)