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Granted! Having found it's own voice it is taking it's nationwide reading tour (and royalties) on the road.
I wish I had some gum.
I wish I had some gum.
Your wish is granted...
- Thread starter sacredmime
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Give me a break .. you already have two ... and could bve taking better care of those
I wish I had seen the sunset.
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Granted. Unfortunately they are unusable because of all the water spouting from them.
I wish I had a Bugatti Royale.
I wish I had a Bugatti Royale.
Granted. Go to Le Petit Coin Café, where a delicious Bugatti Royale dessert is waiting for you. Just let the waiter know whether you like it with whipped cream and a cherry or chopped nuts and banana syrup.
I wish I had a beach house.
I wish I had a beach house.
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Granted. And what a steal!! Three Mile Island is lovely this time of year. Just watch out for the crabs...
I wish every one of my senses were heightened.
I wish every one of my senses were heightened.
Granted. You can now smell it when anyone in your neighbourhood takes a crap, see through clothes of all ugly people, hear any baby crying within a dozen miles, taste things you'd rather just be forgotten and feel your life drawing to an end, one second at a time.
I wish I had one of those Bugatti pastries mentioned above.
I wish I had one of those Bugatti pastries mentioned above.
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Oooo, unfortunately denied 
It was a limited time offer. Try back next week..!
I wish I had adoring fans all around me.
It was a limited time offer. Try back next week..!
I wish I had adoring fans all around me.
Granted. Here is a small delegation of your adoring fans. There are thousands more like them waiting to embrace you.
I wish I could do card tricks.
I wish I could do card tricks.
Granted: Thanks to the Genie you can make credit cards disappear. Every time you hand one to a merchant it will suddenly vanish.
I wish I could find a way to be more attentive.
I wish I could find a way to be more attentive.
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Granted. Say your goodbyes quickly as the human race is about to become extin
I wish for a happy ending.
I wish for a happy ending.
Granted. It is Friday the 13th, you're on Elm Street, having a nightmare. Basically if you wake up you're screwed, if you stay asleep you're screwed.
I wish my vacation had been more restful.
I wish my vacation had been more restful.
Granted, there was an epidemic and no one is going back to that place next year.
I wish someone would tell me how to win millions.
I wish someone would tell me how to win millions.
Granted
It did. Were you watching? Wasn't that great?
I wish I had a matched set of crutches
Granted. Here is your matched set of churches:
(The Genie often has trouble understanding Porter's mumbles and incoherent scribbles.)
I wish my mind worked as fast as my computer.
(The Genie often has trouble understanding Porter's mumbles and incoherent scribbles.)
I wish my mind worked as fast as my computer.
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Granted. You may want to think about an upgrade (Commodore 64 is soooo last century)
I wish there was more time in every day.
I wish there was more time in every day.
Granted. Your subscription to Time has been doubled. You will be charged a mere 250% of the regular rate for this service.
I wish I had a pet chimpanzee.
I wish I had a pet chimpanzee.
Chimpanzees are in short supply, so the Genie is sending you the next best thing:
I wish I could sing at the Met.
I wish I could sing at the Met.
DENIED !!!
The Met does not want to discourage paying customers in these diffcult econmic times.
I wish Numtucks voice did not carry more than a few feet.
Granted, it now is only heard by you. No one else has to endure it.
I wish it would rain more.
I wish it would rain more.
Hasn't the Genie had this one before? Genie always advises people who make that wish to begin building their arcs immediately, and try to rescue as many animals as you can.
I wish I could make flubber.
I wish I could make flubber.