Make up an outrageous lie about the previous poster (archive)

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armydillo978

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PorterStarrByrd was recently detained for flashing a polar bear....and saying "Nom nom nom" at the same time. Sad...really. Poor bear.
 

Nymtoc

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armydillo thought that he could shield his identity by concocting a clever member name, but after extensive research, we have managed to see through his ruse.

His real name is navydillo.
 

Drachen Jager

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Which turned out as a shock to Nymtoc, his secret name is Navydildo.
 

Shirokirie

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Jager likes navy men and he likes dildos, hence why he and Nymtoc are best friends.
 

Drachen Jager

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Shirokirie claims to be able to make use of ten dildos at once, though I'm still unclear on where she puts them all.
 

Nymtoc

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Drachen Jager has discovered the secret of the universe, but he won't tell anyone what it is.
 

Drachen Jager

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Nymtoc had a stained-glass window installed in his chest last week. When asked why he did it, he replied, "Well, somebody had to be first, right?"

Pundits are debating whether he's really insightful, or Chauncey Gardener.
 

Robbert

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Fusspots and monsteRs are generally not reeled back in.
 

Drachen Jager

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Robbert paid the local electrician to wire a lightbulb to the top of his head, now whenever he wants a brilliant idea, >click< on it goes.
 

Drachen Jager

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Nymtoc decided that it would be cheaper to just watch for our lightbulbs to come on, then copy our ideas.
 

me-a-monsteR

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Drachen Jager recently executed a series of house break-ins. Officials are still trying to make sense of the crime scenes. The only things stolen were lightbulbs.
 

Lavern08

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M-a-M once got lost in one of those Where's Waldo pictures.
 

me-a-monsteR

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Lavern had tricked me. She'd drawn a map and said it would take me to the entrance of Fairyland. It took weeks to find my way back. Had to leave Waldo behind though. *sniff* Poor thing.
 

Drachen Jager

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MaM considers Where's Waldo the greatest work of Western literature in the 20th century.
 

Robbert

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Porter considers himself most underrated 21st century writer of Ellesmere Island.
 

armydillo978

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Robbert, actually pronounced "Roubeeert", recently found his distant grand something was Jean Valjean.
 

Nymtoc

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Porter was astonished the other day when he learned that some people cook their meat before eating it.
 

Drachen Jager

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Nymtoc was astonished to find out that some people cook their pasta.
 

Nymtoc

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Drachen Jager was astonished to learn that most people don't eat grass.
 

me-a-monsteR

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For years, Nymtoc watched with evil glee as Drachen Jager grazed with cows. He only stepped in to stop D.J. when mad cow disease broke out, and farmers threatened to shoot all infected.
 
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