As the Cantina Turns - Thanksmibble Part 3
“What the? Huh? What's happening?”
The cantinas called out, confused and disorientated in the dark. There was loud whistle, followed by a stunned silence. In the distance, someone was sounding the gong in the Cabaret to try and establish order. Sian said,
“Everyone stop right where you are. Did we pack any torches?”
“Sorry,” said Debio, “Eye said to pack towels so I took the torches out, I mean it's only two floors down to romance. What could go wrong?”
“I don't know,” Sian replied, “Maybe the lights could go out.”
“Let's just try and stay calm,” said 10s, “Everyone put your right hand on the wall, and your left hand on the shoulder of the person below you and then we'll try and find a door.”
“Er, I don't know who you are, but that isn't my shoulder,” said Max.
“I knew that,” said Sian.
The group made it's way forward tentatively, inching their way down the stone steps, trying not to fall. Behind them the noise grew louder, and the cantinas fought back panic with varying degrees of success. After what seemed like several minutes 10s called out,
“I've found the door,” she fumbled with the handle for a few seconds and Max said,
“Funny, I thought they were all swing doors on the stairs.”
“Maybe they're different on this floor,” said Debio. As they made their way through the door, 10s said,
“Hold on everyone, I think there's a turn here somewhere, I just need to find where the wall ends.”
“Is it me or does anyone else think this corridor's a bit cramped?” asked Sian.
“Yeah, and it's got a funny smell,” said Debio.
“It reminds me of school corridors,” said Max. There was a crash and a loud metallic clang as someone fell over in the dark. 10s swore.
“Are you ok?” The others asked.
“Oh yes, I'm just fine and dandy, thank you,” said 10s, her voice dripping with sarcasm, “I mean I always wanted to sit in a mop bucket in the dark.”
“Why has someone left a mop bucket in the corridor?” Asked Debio.
“You idiot, we're in the cleaning cupboard,” snapped 10s.
“Why did you bring us in here?” Asked Max, “We're supposed to be looking for romance. You're not going to find that in an unlit cleaning cupboard.”
“You need to be more flexible,” said Debio, “You can find romance anywhere.”
Sian lost her patience,
“Look, we need to get outside and we need light, right now. The cantina is in trouble and unless we can find out what's happening and get some reinforcements we're going to lose the contents of the E-Z-Freeze. Now, get 10s out of that mop bucket.”
A couple of minutes later the four cantinas were grouped together at the end of the corridor having extracted themselves from the cleaning cupboard.
“First priority – light,” said Sian, “Let's try some doors.”
The cantinas fumbled around in the dark for a while trying various doors, all of which were locked, until Sian gave a shout,
“Over here, I think I've found something,”
The cantinas groped their way along the stonework and shuffled into the room.
“It's a bit clamy in here, any ideas where we are?” Asked Debio
“None at all. I'll try following a wall,” 10s said, she tapped her hands slowly along the wall. Then there was a dull thud as she tripped over again.
“Are you ok?,” Asked Max, “Hold on, I'll follow you. Start talking so I can find you.”
There was a whirring sound by way of reply.
“What's that?” Asked Debio.
“No idea,” said Sian, “I think I can smell leather or coconut or something over to my left, it seems vaguely familiar.” Her voice grew a little more distant as she made her way further into the room.
“10s, 10s, talk to me, are you OK?” Max's voice moved into a slightly higher register, he was patting and slapping every surface within his reach trying to find 10s.
“I'm more than OK,” came the reply, the whirring sound changed pitch and was joined by another similar noise and then a third.
“Where are you then?”
“Down here,” 10s voice came from somewhere around Max's knees.
“What are you doing on the floor? Hey, what the? What is this?”
“It's a dong,” said 10s, “I fell into the box, it must be my lucky day.”
“What? A mechanical dong?” Said Debio, “Where is this?”
“Oh, I've got it now,” said Sian, “This is erotica.”
“How on Earth do you know that?” Asked Max.
“Oh, I'm, er, well travelled,” said Sian.
“I think we should have turned left at Alberquerque,” said Debio. The rest of the cantinas ignored him as they scrambled and scrabbled their way back out of the room.
“Let's try further down,” said Max, his voice echoed along the stone corridor. After a few yards he found another door which swung open easily as he touched it. There was an ethereal glow from inside.
“Ooo, spooky,” said 10s. The cantinas stepped inside cautiously,
“Can you hear singing?” Asked Debio.
“Aargh!” Yelled Sian diving behind Max for protection and nearly pulling him over
“What? What?”
“Do not be afraid,” said a voice, the cantinas looked up as a small lady who appeared to be glowing, walked down the passage towards them.
“Who? Who are you?” 10s voice cracked as she spoke. All the cantinas looked scared.
“I'm the curator,” answered the lady.
“Where the hell...” began Max.
“Down the hall, second door on the left, just past purgatory and before atheists. Oh, and mind the step. It's a doozy.”
“Er, no, excuse me,” said Max, “I mean to say, what is this place and how come you have power?”
“This is Religious and Spiritual writing young man,” the lady replied, “We have power because we have self-belief. Power comes from within. Why do you ask?”
“Oh, it's just that the power's down in the rest of the building,” said Max.
“I see,” said the curator, “Perhaps we need to become more self-reliant within the forum. May I ask why you've come here today?”
10s explained about their mission to save the contents of the cantina E-Z-Freeze.
“I'm not sure how we can help you,” said the curator, “Other than to tell you that romance is just below us on the next floor. They seem like nice people despite their over-abundance of doilies. I find it hard to believe that they would plan anything like you suggest but I suppose that we are all fallible in one way or another.”
“There is something you can help us with,” said Max, “Which way did you say hell was?”
The curator gave him a puzzled look and then pointed out ceramic tile Good Intentions that paved the road to hell. Max dashed off and returned a few minutes later with a couple of smoking torches.
“Fire and brimstone,” he explained on his return, “Impossible to extinguish.”
The cantinas thanked the curator and made their way out.
“Maybe now we can find romance,” said 10s.
“You know you say the sweetest things,” said Sian.