The ship docked at Southampton and Edgar Farlow stepped off, breathing the English air, silently vowing never to leave it again. From all around him came shouts of joy as men rushed past, falling into the arms of loved ones. The sun scorched overhead and many of the men were bare chested.
This is the hard part. Since it's the beginning of a chapter, chances are the ambiguities I have are already addressed earlier on. But anyway:
"Ship" is too generic if it hasn't been talked about before. It may tell a lot about Edgar and the story whether he steps off of a yacht or a cargo ship or fishing boat. ETA: it's, kinda, explained in the 2nd sentence but still suggest to use a more specific word for ship unless it's clear from the preceding chapter.
A ship docks (specific, usu at a dock) at/in a large city (which by the way took me a second to realize it's the Southampton in England rather than in Long Island since I live near NYC but shouldn't be a problem if it's clear the setting is in the UK) and a person steps off (precise movement at some precise place eg. can't step off in the harbor water which is still part of the city) sounds a little odd to me. The city (or just the name thereof) is too board a term for this sentence IMHO.
I'm not sure why "English" air but maybe the ship is coming from Spain or the Carribian? If so it may be fine.
"...silently vowing never to leave
it again..." "It" means the ship or Southampton? Why "silently?"
"...falling into the arms of
loved ones" is a journalistic style of writing. A fiction is a much more objective piece of writing. I'd rather read judgmental/specific words like wives, women, mistresses, children, 5-legged aliens, etc through the eyes of Edgar.
The placement of the third sentence seems odd. The first sets the scene, the second expands the scene and describes actions (think a camera moving along a railing system as the actors and extras run toward the women and kids), then you halt the action and talk about weather and muscles (ignore the actors and pan the camera up to the sky). I'm inclined to reword them a little, you know, experience with more cut n pastes.