SUDDENLY

[Lidiya]

Whenever someone uses the word "suddenly", I immediately think of someone slamming against a wall or a child going crazy and running around the room.

[Hiroko]

I try to fix where I write "certain" adverbs/verbs too much; let's leave it at that.

[EarlyBird]

Oh yes, the justs. Oi. I battled with them in my last WIP. What the H was I thinking??

[mscelina]

Originally Posted by NeuroFizz

@ Celina

This is why I emphasized "in my own writing." But I still frequently consider it weak or lazy writing when reading the work of others. When I am tempted to use "suddenly," I take it as a challenge to re-write without the word. And there is a difference between use of "sudden" and "suddenly."

Off the top of my head, Ms. Editor...

I gripped the eyedropper with both hands and put a slight pressure on the bulb. One drop of poison and he wouldn't be able to taste it. Two and he'd know for sure. I could steady my hands to play piano in an auditorium full of strangers, but not to murder my husband?

The doorbell chimed and the full contents of the eyedropper squirted into the coffee.

Footsteps echoed in the hall. "Where's my coffee? And answer the damn doorbell."

Maybe not the best example, but I'm a believer that you make an action sudden through surrounding context and by just writing the action itself. Also, the apparent absurdity of "why not to murder my husband" (hopefully) occupies the writers mind going into the startle event. What would "suddenly" add to this, either to the doorbell or the footsteps?

The cat's head knocked my book upward and stabbing pain radiated in my legs as her claws dug deep.

Again, what would suddenly add to this? In my mind, absolutely nothing. And if I wanted to make it even more sudden, I'd write the prose leading to this action at a slow pace and in a calm tone to emphasize the sudden and drastic nature of this particular action. The next few sentences would be more actively paced to further enhance the transition-producing action.

Nope. Doesn't answer a darn thing, Neuro. However, I would opine as the editor of a lot of authors who write on spec that I can also find no good reason to REMOVE said suddenlys UNLESS the author is overusing the word. Four or five suddenlys in a 100k manuscript is NOTHING compared to the thousand uses of 'it was' as the main subject/predicate--at least in my opinion. As an editor, I tend to leave the author's words intact unless there is a reason not to do so, and the last thing I want to do to a writer who's working to meet a deadline is to get them obsessing over ways to rewrite a sentence to avoid a commonly used adverb.

As a writer, however, I use suddenly upon occasion without conscious thought or remorse.

"Suddenly, she was on her ass at the foot of the steps" works better for my particular narrative style than "She tripped and fell". There's nothing technically wrong with either sentence if they are true to the narrative style of the story.

So, sure--any writer may make the conscious decision to avoid using suddenly in their work, but in the grand scheme of things it's not going to actively prevent a book from being signed. As long as the use of the adverb is appropriate and works within the narrative style of the story, "suddenly" is fine by me. But usually, if an author is overusing "suddenly" there are other problems with the manuscript that are more serious--telling instead of showing, for example. So it's my thought that "suddenly" is a symptom more than the disease.

*pulls Neuro's manuscript from Delphi to run a search for uses of 'suddenly'*

Hmm...this could be interesting...

[jaksen]

Suddenly I wondered if I use the word 'suddenly' too often...

Then, just as suddenly, I didn't care.

If the word fits, if it's the right word, use it.

[Jim Oliver]

Minor derail...

This site is the funnest way to find your over-used words: wordle.net

[mscelina]

I actually use that a lot. It's a huge help to see what words--aside from character names and common tags--I overuse. It's quicker than doing multiple searches, and gives you a quick, solid indication of what you need to work on.

ETA: Just did this for my WIP, now in revisions at 114k. Just wanted to say--no suddenlys in MY cloud.

[NeuroFizz]

One "suddenly" in 3.99 but used in internal dialogue of the MC:

I'm suddenly slobber hungry.

So it's not used in the way that bothers me so (dialogue, both internal and external, is a very different situation). And in the context of this scene, it works well. In fact, this sentence without "suddenly" would not be effective at all.

I remain unshaken in my original comments as long as everyone realizes that (as indicated in the my first post) this is how I feel about using "suddenly." Y'all can find your own comfort with the word.

I can't seem to find my copy of Self-Editing for Fiction Writers (one of the few writing books I still like to consult regularly). I believe it is from this book that I first formed my dislike for "suddenly" as a way of telling how an action is taking place. Others can check to see what that source says abut it. I have to track down my copy (probably loaned it to someone without writing down the borrower's name).

[EnitaMeadows]

I don't overuse 'suddenly,' but in my next story, I seemed to use 'and then' and 'but' to start sentences, which is even worse. Working through them during my next round with my line editor. Oy.

[Lyxdeslic]

Never, ever, not once should any writer use "suddenly" in the narrative. The "suddenly, comma" construct zaps the suddenness right out of the suddenness. IMO Ah, bullshit. It's not an opinion; it's a fact.

That said, I have three "suddenlys" in my ms, all in dialogue. Employed as follows: "I didn’t even want those things three days ago, but suddenly they were all I wanted.”

Lyx

[rwm4768]

I use suddenly every now and then, but most of the time, I try not to start a sentence with it. I feel that makes something seem less sudden. On a related note, what do people think of the word sudden with no adverbial ending?

[CatchingADragon]

I read the title of this thread and then, suddenly, at that moment, in one fell swoop, I quickly instantly immediately just very simply really realized that I do use the word quite often.

Looking back through my WIP, it's unneeded most of the time I use it, but I think still has its place sometimes.

"He suddenly woke up, his head throbbing." Doesn't really add much.

"The ship suddenly jolted." As opposed to an un-sudden jolt?

"He scratched his head as if he suddenly had fleas." I think it helps get across the notion that he scratches his head, well, suddenly; it's not just a casual scratch.

"Suddenly the thought of having a brother he’d never met was painful." I'm not sure. Maybe it shouldn't be the first word, but I think there is a definite difference between a sudden thought or emotion and an ordinary thought or emotion.

[Katrina S. Forest]

Originally Posted by Jim Oliver

Minor derail...

This site is the funnest way to find your over-used words: wordle.net

I never saw that site before. I tried it out and found a few offending words (besides suddenly) that weren't always needed.

I think it's important to note often how words are used in dialogue vs. in the narrative. Some characters have a particular way of speaking and do repeat the same word a lot.

[WriteMinded]

I was browsing the web. Suddenly, I wanted to visit AW. When I saw Lyxdeslic's avatar, I suddenly wanted to linger.

[Coop720]

Nice discussion, guys! I would answer you all, but sadly I have work now haha

I hope this helps other writers!

[tko]

Sometimes we use "suddenly" to highlight something. Which can also be done by starting a new paragraph and removing "suddenly". Make it one line and it stands out. Not that you want to overuse that either.

Funny. What doesn't happen suddenly? For there's always a time when something isn't happening, then it does.

What we mean many times is that it surprised a character. The sudden slam of the door. Slam and sudden are redundant, but what we want to convey is that the POV was surprised. So, maybe "the slam of the door made her jump." Perhaps not the best, but very clear.

Also, it could mean abruptly. With no warning. "With no warning a fist hit his jaw." An even worse sentence but . . .

So say what you mean. Suddendly is very often used for the wrong reasons, leading the reader to guess. That's it's greatest flaw.

[sekime]

I refuse to use any words that end in _______ly and found another way around it.

[WriteMinded]

Suddenly. A good name for a book. Somebody write it.

Originally Posted by sekime

I refuse to use any words that end in _______ly and found another way around it.

How sly.

[scarletpeaches]

Originally Posted by WillSauger

We as writers are strict to a point, but the reader can care less.

I would say some people couldn't care less, but hey, I guess I'm a pedant.

[seun]

Originally Posted by mscelina

Four or five suddenlys in a 100k manuscript is NOTHING compared to the thousand uses of 'it was' as the main subject/predicate--at least in my opinion.

Butting in to say that, yes, Celina will definitely kick your arse when it comes to it was.

As well I know.

[sadbeautifultragic]

As I read through the thread, I suddenly realized that

Okay I'm not going to go there. Too lame, even for me.

Anyway, I'm having a really hard time with "suddenly" in this WIP because my MC "suddenly" disappears into thin air a lot. And when I'm writing from MC2's POV and let's say they're about to kiss or something, I always write things like "suddenly he wasn't there" "suddenly he was gone again" and sladhfkawhjeroqiwdhe I NEED TO STOP DOING THAT!

So yeah, that's me

[Bufty]

George leaned closer, lips puckered. Her perfume... Any second now. What the...? For Christ sake! She'd done it again. He threw the pillow at the mirror. "Will you stop doing that!"

JAS- If the reader knows she vanishes at will and it is instantaneous there's no need to say suddenly at all because there's no other way to instantly vanish.

[crunchyblanket]

Surely the most inappropriate use of the word 'suddenly':



I was walking down the street minding my own business when SUDDENLY! PASTA SALAD!