What is the correct way to write dialogue when a character (who has multiple personalities) is talking silently to them in her mind, and conversing with another character aloud. Written in first person. Would I put the private conversation in italics and use quotation marks, and leave the other dialogue in regular font?
Question about dialogue.
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There's no 'correct' way.
Try it and see. Normally, dialogue spoken by characters is in normal type with conversation quotes.
Whatever method you try to cover a situation outside that will work if it's clear and apparent to the reader who is talking to whom.
Try it and see. Normally, dialogue spoken by characters is in normal type with conversation quotes.
Whatever method you try to cover a situation outside that will work if it's clear and apparent to the reader who is talking to whom.
I had a similar situation. My MC was talking mentally to a ghost. I used italics for the internal communication, and it seemed to work fine.
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Not to spit back the same answer as another, but anytime I write something internally with a character; including dreams, visions, thoughts and conversations, I always use italics.
I've never had any complaints so far. Of course, these are limited to the two beta readers that have read my work so far.
I've never had any complaints so far. Of course, these are limited to the two beta readers that have read my work so far.
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Savanna. There isn't a correct way to do this, but I see a wonderful opportunity to use some internal dialogue. I don't use italics for much of anything except for word or phrase emphasis, so I don't have any advice on whether to use italics or not. Whatever you choose to do, just be consistent.
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In a story I am working on, my character talks mentally to a ghost as well. I don't use italics.
In my book my character has schizo-affective disorder. Anything anybody around him says is written without dialogue tags because they all come through his filter (it's written in first person past). Anything the voices he hears say is written in dialogue tags because they are outside of his control and so outside of what he can filter to the reader.
So it would be like, as very basic examples:
Felix said I needed to go to the shops and pick up the milk for the cat.
"Don't go to the shops, stay with us."
Or-
Jack began shouting: Stop ignoring me it's rude!
"Don't listen to Jack, listen to us."
I'm finding it a pretty difficult way to write but when it works it's brilliant.
So it would be like, as very basic examples:
Felix said I needed to go to the shops and pick up the milk for the cat.
"Don't go to the shops, stay with us."
Or-
Jack began shouting: Stop ignoring me it's rude!
"Don't listen to Jack, listen to us."
I'm finding it a pretty difficult way to write but when it works it's brilliant.
I'm facing the same problem
I've been doing what you're doing (using italics), and setting them off in their own line. It seems to look better if I keep each mental sentence to under one line. But there is no right or wrong. I might change later.
Suzy walked down the street.
You need to turn back.
The street was empty. Nothing seemed out of place.
"Why are we stopping?" said Joe.
Run!
I've been doing what you're doing (using italics), and setting them off in their own line. It seems to look better if I keep each mental sentence to under one line. But there is no right or wrong. I might change later.
Suzy walked down the street.
You need to turn back.
The street was empty. Nothing seemed out of place.
"Why are we stopping?" said Joe.
Run!
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Depends. I don't think there's a hard and fast rule. In my WIP I've done it w/ and w/out italics.
Whatever works.
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I assume by 'inside voice' you mean something other than a thought?
Italics are usually for emphasis, and if what is written can be clearly identified as what it is supposed to be there should be no need for automatic italics.
Italics are usually for emphasis, and if what is written can be clearly identified as what it is supposed to be there should be no need for automatic italics.
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As author of some of these examples, I'd say it's a stylistic choice, which is acceptable as long as the point is made without flammoxing and/or irritating the reader.
Which begs the question: How would you ever know?
To which I'd answer, How do you ever know? Rejections? Revise/resubmits? Sales? Reviews?
Was The Road made clearer by lack of punctuation?
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This is a common event in one of my worlds. My editor solved the difference between the character's internal thoughts, versus actual mental conversation by doing the internal thoughts in italics, and the mental conversation in a different font (in our case, Arial.) We had times where the character was saying one thing out loud, thinking a sarcastic comment, and dictating to a third party off-site, all in one big block.
Readers stated they found it easy to follow.
Readers stated they found it easy to follow.
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I've done telepathy with quotes before. Two characters having a conversation, while one of them is thinking thoughts to another back and forth. The real dialogue was written normally, and the thoughts were in italics.
One of the major classics of SF to deal with telepathic communication is Slan, by A.E. Van Vogt. He renders telepathic dialogue as standard dialogue, and makes clear in context which is which. No italics, no gimmicks, just a damn good story.
Concentrate on the damn good story part.
caw
Concentrate on the damn good story part.
caw
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The "rule," such that it is (and please note I put rule in quotes ), I've seen for using italics for internal dialog is to "only" do it when you are either using an I statement in third person narrative, or using present tense in past tense narrative.
But like any other rule, there are exceptions. I read a book a while back where the writer did not use italics for these situations (and did not tag them as thoughts), and I found it a bit jarring to find an I statement in the middle of a third person paragraph or to see a present tense statement/perception in the middle of past tense narrative. But I'm not used to seeing authors do this, probably because most of the authors I've read in recent years use the italics method.
I have also seen authors who tag every line of internal dialog (she thought), and thus bypass the italic issue. I think Jean Auel did this in her books. But the current style trending towards eliminating tags whenever feasible, may explain why italics are used a lot.
Whether or not to use italics for other purposes gets stickier, as the more things you use them for, the more potential for confusion there can be. Also, some readers find long paragraphs of italicized text to be annoying or distracting.
I read a lot of SF and fantasy, so I'm "used" to seeing things like telepathy, mindspeech and other forms of nonverbal dialog italicized (the Anne McCaffrey approach). But it works best if the individuals communicating in this manner are on the laconic side, I think.
You could also use normal quotations, but tag the dialog (or describe associated actions or perceptions) in a way to make it clear it's non spoken.
I agree with the others who said there's no "set" way to handle these things, so long as you're consistent.
), I've seen for using italics for internal dialog is to "only" do it when you are either using an I statement in third person narrative, or using present tense in past tense narrative.But like any other rule, there are exceptions. I read a book a while back where the writer did not use italics for these situations (and did not tag them as thoughts), and I found it a bit jarring to find an I statement in the middle of a third person paragraph or to see a present tense statement/perception in the middle of past tense narrative. But I'm not used to seeing authors do this, probably because most of the authors I've read in recent years use the italics method.
I have also seen authors who tag every line of internal dialog (she thought), and thus bypass the italic issue. I think Jean Auel did this in her books. But the current style trending towards eliminating tags whenever feasible, may explain why italics are used a lot.
Whether or not to use italics for other purposes gets stickier, as the more things you use them for, the more potential for confusion there can be. Also, some readers find long paragraphs of italicized text to be annoying or distracting.
I read a lot of SF and fantasy, so I'm "used" to seeing things like telepathy, mindspeech and other forms of nonverbal dialog italicized (the Anne McCaffrey approach). But it works best if the individuals communicating in this manner are on the laconic side, I think.
You could also use normal quotations, but tag the dialog (or describe associated actions or perceptions) in a way to make it clear it's non spoken.
I agree with the others who said there's no "set" way to handle these things, so long as you're consistent.
I always use italics for thoughts etc, but I think the main thing is to just make it clear to the reader and stick to it.
"The Anne McCaffery approach" is probably why I went with italics with my MC’s mental communication with a ghost, now that you mention it.
I have seen such thoughts and mental conversations done both with italics and without, and I’ve seen both done well. I went with italics because it suited the situation, though I’m sure I could manage it without italics as well. In my book, the situation only happens twice, so the use of italics is sparse. That made sense to me in my situation.
To the OP, I’d say try a sample both ways and see what you think.
I have seen such thoughts and mental conversations done both with italics and without, and I’ve seen both done well. I went with italics because it suited the situation, though I’m sure I could manage it without italics as well. In my book, the situation only happens twice, so the use of italics is sparse. That made sense to me in my situation.
To the OP, I’d say try a sample both ways and see what you think.
Italics aren't gimmicks. To name a few legitimate uses, they mark the titles of books, movies, magazines, plays, ships, bridges, trains, airplanes, epic poems, etc. We also need them for special or foreign words and phrases, key terms, and emphasis.
Many fiction writers also use them for thoughts, reserving quotation marks for spoken words. Although there are other methods, the style makes sense, and readers catch on quickly.
I have a similar use: American Sign Language is both a bit "foreign" and also unspoken, so I render signs with italics. Nice-meet-you.
Many fiction writers also use them for thoughts, reserving quotation marks for spoken words. Although there are other methods, the style makes sense, and readers catch on quickly.
I have a similar use: American Sign Language is both a bit "foreign" and also unspoken, so I render signs with italics. Nice-meet-you.
If it were me, I would write the POV character's thoughts, conversational or otherwise, in italics. With that being said, I might put a multiple personality in bold italics. That, with appropriately placed dialogue tags. Any normal conversation I would put in double quotes.
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