Stew's commentary part 3
This next set challenged me a great deal. Jacob's twisted Eden is disturbing and painful to watch. In a surprising way, I believe most readers can relate a bit, in whatever personal way, where we reach toward something and when we fail, wonder why we ever thought we could achieve it in the first place. this set solidifies his belief that he deserves what he gets. I hate that for him, but I also understand it.
I had intended to get all the way through Anna, Adjacent today, but honestly, that poem is a different mind set for me, and I want to spend a bit more time with it. She'll be in the next set.
anyway, as I said, very challenging, but hopefully I am not too far off the mark in my interpretations. I continue to be inspired by this work, think of it often, and have enjoyed going through this thus far. Looking forward to my next set already (and to reading 17!)
Part IX - The Virtues of Work
So preached the preacher:
"Tomorrow is a garden - here's the first word to set us up for the whole of today's exercise.
which must be tended by
a sturdy back
a steady hand
.....and
a sober eye; we start off immediately with a rhyme and S-word alliteration. He’s already told us it is a preacher speaking (or rather, preaching), so the unwritten aspect of this provides tone, and even accent. The preacher’s voice is clear, as we already understand this is “sermon” speak.
that which does not eat shall die. And we have a strike-fear line which stands alone, but caries the rhyme.
Fruits of labor are sweetest
and from the dirt they call We already feel the same rhythm in just two lines of this stanza. The preacher is deliberate in his speech, thanks to the poet.
the fallen saint
the sinning wench
.....and
the meager thrall; and the rhyme continues as well as the S alliteration. S is an interesting choice for me here, because it is a hiss – and we are talking about a garden. And we are talking about a preacher. I appreciate the snake in the garden and how it plays on multiple levels. We don’t like this man. At least I don’t, for all his judgmental, sibilant speech.
what does not take root shall fall." And here is the rhyme which completes this set. Again, the final strike-fear is set apart which adds emphasis and requires this line to carry more weight of the stanza than the others.
But Jacob,
unshackled as
a tumbleweed,
would not heed
the lesson
and spoke
instead of
drought and
famine and both words ring Old Testament. And it matters.
poison soil
and did not take
to righteous toil. another word laden with Biblical implications.
We already knew Jacob would not appreciate this man. He is, after all, a representative of the things Jacob struggles with, within himself.
The preacher did not spare the rod - common language we hear all the time, spare the rod, spoil the child. But it has roots in Christianity. I had to look up the verse: Proverbs 13:24.
but Jacob held his tongue,
for it was by the hand of God
that the strap was swung. Our S-words make a full journey throughout this poem to great effect. And Jacob accepts the representative for what it is; punishment. He already punishes himself; now God is handing it out, in the form of the preacher. I told William this preacher reminds me of the typical southern preacher trope, but there is something else. I decided he was quite like Boss Godfrey in Cool Hand Luke (which also represents a wrathful God).
The mentions of dirt/soil, and fruit are reminiscent of the earlier mentions of the orchard and Jacob with the dog skull. NO wonder he believes the soil to be poisoned. And the "garden" is quite twisted, as I said.
Part X - About Anna
She too is a beast of burden – we are reminded once again of animal nature.
bound under the preacher's yoke. Just in case you missed it.
Behind the third door
down the hall, she sleeps
beneath a photograph
of some beloved matriarch
long-dead and looming. I like Anna’s proximity to a beloved and dead matriarch. It feels important. I may be reaching, but I think of Mary in the picture because of the religious context of the piece before it. Long-dead and looming is a wonderful line. The Ls play nicely against the Bs (behind, beneath, beloved). I also think the picture is an important detail to Jacob because his own dead beloved mother looms large in his life, still.
He imagines the slumber-swell
of her breasts as she breathes
the breath of the dreamer.
Jacob does not dream. This line, standing alone reminds me very much of Part I. “Jacob is not home.” The tone carries it. William, you continue using tiny threads to pull the pieces together. This small thread here pulls the pieces before it nice and tight against this one, like cinching a strap around the whole of it. And just as "Jacob is not home" felt ominous, this one does too.
He draws his blanket,
growing warmer – (growing is appropriate, and used well here. We are have been round and round the garden/orchard/field. The different purpose of the word - to grow as in plant or grow as increase - doesn't matter, as long as the allusion stands.)
Jacob the farmer makes seed. – He crosses here from beast to human with the word, Farmer. And the double-sided seed is perfect here.
Part XI - The Folly of Sloth
As the preacher oppressed
and blistered his back,
so the tormenting sun
vultured his shoulders. That sun and the preacher are given similar action.” Vultured” is a lovely verb, don’t you think? Carrion action by non-animal, and the companion action of the preacher tie them tightly together. The same result is gained whether by sun or man/God.
Jacob defied two masters - yes, here. See? The sun and the preacher? Or the preacher and God? I don’t think Jacob can tell the difference between them, honestly.
and from the field
made good his escape
past a bending stream
into crooked trees
with branches ancient
and low - again I see his gnarly orchard – I felt a bit of an “eden” thing happening earlier, this is its reinforcement. (the religion stuff, I warned you, William – I am not sure if I read too much in, or not enough.)
and hid with his sin
in the shadows. And this definitely feels like Eden. Hiding with his sin. The idea that Jacob feels shame as a sinner is purely human. And I no longer have to wonder why he perhaps prefers animal.
Like his namesake, he – very good reinforcement of Christian theology here.
rested his head
on a pillow of stone,
praying himself to sleep,
imploring the Lord
to lower His ladder, ( Jacob’s Ladder – very clever, indeed).
teeming with angels,
that he might ascend
and crest at the feet
of the Father.
He woke instead
to a scorpion
scaling his belly,
tail curled
and dripping,
beneath an empty sky.
In Jacob’s mind he has been denied by God. Again, the “deserved” punishment/banishment he as always expected. We have seen him on more than one occasion, treat himself in this way. His attempt was in earnest, and his disappointment is palpable. I’m a bit heartbroken for his reach toward a faith that didn’t produce relief.
Part XII - The Wretched Sing the Song God Wants to Hear – and the heartbreak continues. He is resigned, and beaten. And that is just the title.
Was cold
was rain
brought Jacob again – This sounds like a hymn. The quick rhyme of rain/again provides a rhythm to work within.
to the door
of the preacher
to trade his hunger
for the lash
and the Word. Again, as with "sun and preacher" having the same end in different ways, the lash and the Word do as well. They’re linked, and nearly indistinguishable from one another. It is both. His associations of the Word and the lash as one thing, feeding the idea of his disappointment, his resignation to God’s denial.
We see Jacob accepting punishment.
But Jacob's was the prayer
of the mockingbird. The rhyme at the end drives it home. And once again, he behaves as an animal would. Doing what he has to do for his hunger, and then the literal aspect of Mockingbird as animal.
