Obsessive Rep Point Checkers Club (Volume IV)

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Vince524

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I'd like your opinions on something.

My sister-in-law (Yes, that sister in law) wanted to take my daughter to a concert. It's in Hersey Park which isn't near us, but they were going and knew my one daughter would like to. So she invited her. Turns out, the invitation was really for transport, we had to pay for the ticket and give $ for food. We were going to let her go since she would only be gone a couple of days.

Then we thought about taking our vacation near there to visit a relative. We'd go, driving my daughter, rendezvous for the concert which wasn't something any of us wanted to see. (Justin Timberlake and Jay-Z.) So my SIL changed her plans so they wouldn't come right home afterwards.

Well since then, I had my knee surgery and I can't make trips like that. We didn't think it would be this hard after this time. Plus, my wife and sister had another blow out fight.

So we decided my daughter couldn't go. She would have to be gone 2 weeks now.

Naturally, SIL was pissed. Mind you, we were out the money. She keeps saying we never intended to let her go. Because yeah, we like to spend $100 on a concert ticket for my daughter just to waste it.

The concert was a couple of days ago. On the morning of, SIL texted my daughter about what a wonderful time they were having on the trip and how sorry they were that she wasn't allowed to go.

My daughter showed my wife. My wife texted back not to send anymore texts rubbing it in. Later than night she called the home # while the concert was going on. Since then, we have blocked their cells from receiving texts from her.

She sent a long rambling text to my wife, calling her a sociopath and saying that we're going to end up alone because someday when the girls are adults they'll break away from us.

Thoughts?
 

SaraP

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I would say what she did, texting, calling, seems pretty mean. Rubbing it in is a very good way of putting it. The only way I can see of it not being the case was if the text conveyed that they really wished your daughter was there, a "It would have been so wonderful if you had come, so sorry you couldn't make it, we're thinking of you" type deal - which doesn't seem like it, from what you posted.

Now, regarding what she told you, that your daughters will abandon you? That's way below the belt and a completely ridiculous thing to say, imo. That's basically meant to make you guys feel horrible, and meant to make you feel insecure in your parenting skills. Just ignore it, really. Not much else you can do, I don't think, except maybe discuss the situation with your daughter, if you think it's appropriate.

And *hugs*. Crappy situation to be in, for sure.
 

parumpdragon

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I'd like your opinions on something. ...

She sent a long rambling text to my wife, calling her a sociopath and saying that we're going to end up alone because someday when the girls are adults they'll break away from us.

Thoughts?

I'd say the sociopath is your SIL. Just from her behavior. :( But that's my opinion.

Hope things are quieter now, Vince.

:Hug2:
 

DeleyanLee

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I'd like your opinions on something.

*snip*

She sent a long rambling text to my wife, calling her a sociopath and saying that we're going to end up alone because someday when the girls are adults they'll break away from us.

Thoughts?

When someone starts name-calling, they're looking in a mirror. When they start making hurtful predictions, they're voicing their own fears. It's always about them and they see everyone else as reflections of themselves.

The only way they can hurt someone else is if that someone else believes and accepts that hurt, because of their own insecurities. And when that happens, the first someone "wins" and keeps doing what worked.

I come from a highly dysfunctional family, Vince. More dysfunctional than what you talk about with this SIL. I have some experience and those realizations saved me (and my kids) from going postal several times. Personally, I'd cut her (and any family that supported her) totally out of my life (just like I did my own family--for over 10 years) because I don't need that kind of crap, but that's me. Yunz will have to find your own way through the bog.

Good luck once again.
 

parumpdragon

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...Personally, I'd cut her (and any family that supported her) totally out of my life ... because I don't need that kind of crap, but that's me. Yunz will have to find your own way through the bog.

Good luck once again.

*hugs to you Del* :Hug2:

And Vince, I agree with her. If someone in your family is causing nothing but trouble and hurt, you're probably better off without them for now. *Hugs to you too* :Hug2:
 

Myrealana

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Crazy people gonna be cray-cray.

I'd stop all contact with her, without explanation. None is needed and certainly none is owed.

As for your daughters, I would probably not share details of the exchange. It might seem like sour grapes from their POV. I'd tell them only what you need to in generic terms.

I had a similar problem with my son's step-mother. She went all psycho on me and said some pretty awful things about me and my son. Unfortunately, while I could cut off contact with her, I couldn't cut my son off because he had the right to visit his dad. She was all sweetness and light when he was at their house, and would sweetly and oh-so-innocently spread nasty lies about me to my son.

But crazy people gonna be cray-cray, and eventually she went too far. My son refused to be in the same house with her and my ex divorced her.

Kids figure out who can be trusted and who is a psycho. They may not do it right away - but they will figure it out.
 

SaraP

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Kids figure out who can be trusted and who is a psycho. They may not do it right away - but they will figure it out.

This, exactly.

How's it going, Sparkling Unipony?

Going ok, Del. :) Taking the kidlets to see Despicable Me 2 today. I saw it a few weeks ago, when visiting my guy in the US and loved it. Now it's their turn. :)
 

DeleyanLee

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I still haven't seen it, but I'm poor. I'll wait until it's on On Demand or something, like I did the first one. But, then, I don't see that many movies in the theater, so it's not a surprise.

I did like the first one, though. I'm hoping the second follows nicely in its footsteps, but I've become increasingly wary of movie sequels lately.
 

parumpdragon

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Last night I got a lot done on the alien version of my character - can't wait to finish up the painting later :D
 

DeleyanLee

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Good for you, PD! :D

I'm just halfway through a hell week at work. I'm stuck with the newbie who the biggest noob. Seriously NOT happy about the scheduling. Sometimes ya gotta wonder what you did to piss off the boss, y'know?
 

parumpdragon

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Yeah, I keep taking pictures of the painting as it takes shape, so I have it in stages if I want to look back. Lol.

And as for the boss, chocolates, or flowers maybe? ;) (Just kidding)
 

DeleyanLee

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Nope. Wouldn't help.

I'm thinking a 10 lb sledge, personally. Applied firmly to the back of her head.

But only in the pages of a book. Honestly.
 

Myrealana

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Taking the kidlets to see Despicable Me 2 today. I saw it a few weeks ago, when visiting my guy in the US and loved it. Now it's their turn. :)
My 10-year-old son went to see it with his grandma and begged me to take him again, but I hadn't seen the first one.

I liked it anyway.
 

SaraP

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The movie is a lot of fun. I had never seen the first one, so I got that handled first (the other-half, plus his sis, his brother, and his brother's gf - properly loaded with popcorn and drinks). That in itself was awesome, and then a few days later we went to see DM2. I laughed so hard at the last scene I couldn't breathe.

The kidlets had a good time tonight, though I don't what amused them the most, the movie itself or my laughing at it. :D
 

parumpdragon

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I finished painting both the human an alien versions of my MC - *am painting* - Happy Dance!
 

DeleyanLee

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Hurray, PD! I know that Housemate is enjoying getting back into it, so I can kinda picture how happy you are. It's nice to do something that you enjoy so much. :D
 

J.S.F.

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I preferred the first Despicable Me, FWIW, but #2 isn't that bad, and you gotta love the minions!

Won't comment on Vince's family dynamics thingie except to say that his SIL sounds like a real nutbag. I'm just glad I had a nice and dull and normal family life growing up. You gotta be grateful for the little things in life.

Editing pretty much done on Lindsay versus the Marauders and have sent it in along with the sequel. Working on Catnip in dribs and drabs, a chapter or so a day, trying to revise it until the first call comes around for the editing. Love writing, but editing is a necessary evil, that's all I'll say.

How's the weather in everyone's neck of the woods? Here in Osaka it is heavy with a capital 'H'--almost a hundred during the day and not that much cooler at night.
 

Sheila Muirenn

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I'd like your opinions on something.

My sister-in-law (Yes, that sister in law) wanted to take my daughter to a concert. It's in Hersey Park which isn't near us, but they were going and knew my one daughter would like to. So she invited her. Turns out, the invitation was really for transport, we had to pay for the ticket and give $ for food. We were going to let her go since she would only be gone a couple of days.

Then we thought about taking our vacation near there to visit a relative. We'd go, driving my daughter, rendezvous for the concert which wasn't something any of us wanted to see. (Justin Timberlake and Jay-Z.) So my SIL changed her plans so they wouldn't come right home afterwards.

Well since then, I had my knee surgery and I can't make trips like that. We didn't think it would be this hard after this time. Plus, my wife and sister had another blow out fight.

So we decided my daughter couldn't go. She would have to be gone 2 weeks now.

Naturally, SIL was pissed. Mind you, we were out the money. She keeps saying we never intended to let her go. Because yeah, we like to spend $100 on a concert ticket for my daughter just to waste it.

The concert was a couple of days ago. On the morning of, SIL texted my daughter about what a wonderful time they were having on the trip and how sorry they were that she wasn't allowed to go.

My daughter showed my wife. My wife texted back not to send anymore texts rubbing it in. Later than night she called the home # while the concert was going on. Since then, we have blocked their cells from receiving texts from her.

She sent a long rambling text to my wife, calling her a sociopath and saying that we're going to end up alone because someday when the girls are adults they'll break away from us.

Thoughts?

Interesting how you ended this in 'thoughts.' Doesn't sound like a lot of thinking happened on dear SIL's part.

Maybe, don't waste your own thoughts on this matter? Sometimes, family is better kept at a distance. I have some that I don't mind IMing through FB a couple times per year, but I don't want to do more than that.
 

DeleyanLee

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We're a lot wetter than normal for summer, so the humidity's been nasty for months. We've had some hot days, but this week's been the normal 80's for this time of year. Though I am getting real tired of the rain.
 

parumpdragon

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Hurray, PD! I know that Housemate is enjoying getting back into it, so I can kinda picture how happy you are. It's nice to do something that you enjoy so much. :D

Yeah, it's relaxing between rounds of edits. That's why I started doing it. Never imagined they'd turn out so well. :)
 
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