The Compleat 'Thorn Forest' (A Gift for AW)

Stew21

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Damn Anna. damn the pastor (Boss Godfrey), damn Jacob's dad, and Miss Mindy. Get him bsck to the orchard where he belongs. Give him his pack . Poor Jacob.
 

Magdalen

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If this poem were a restaurant or hotel, it would be rated 5 stars *****
If this poem were a car it would be a Ferrari.
If this poem were a movie it would score a double thumbs up. (& I'd rate it R!!).
If this poem were a holiday, it would have enthusiastic celebrants
- worldwide - reciting it for the next 1,000 years.
If this poem were toothpaste, four out of five dentists would recommend it.

IF this poem were Experience, many readers it would try to form a band with Jimi Hendrix.

Since this poem is actually a poem,
serially-posted, organic, in situ and
(for some mature followers of your work)
so far, deeply & repeatedly satisfying,
I'd like you to know that on my poetically-personal
poetic rating system this poem
consistently rolls in 5 Vintage-chrome, Full-moon hubcaps ***!!

So, uh, thanks for posting this!!



(half a wine bottle & a cork-bung below Rimbaud)*
 
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CassandraW

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Magdalen, you are completely insane, and that is what I like best about you.


ETA:

I seem to be on some kind of kick lately, telling people I like them for various peculiar reasons. It's probably best to stay away from me until I get past it.
 
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Debbie V

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How frightened I was to look for this last week and not find it where expected. How glad to see the sticky. Now I'm just scared for poor Jacob and poor Anna.
 

Stew21

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Oh this is so well crafted. The s alliteration is back. And preacher's snake motif. The rhythm is perfect. Pacing made me anxious. Wow.

This won't end well will it.

Incredible work, William.
 

cray

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this means nothing but the word that comes to mind for this (part 25) is slick. i'm not sure why,....but that's what i get.


pretty awesome, william.

THANK YOU.
 

Ari Meermans

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William already knows what this poem does to me, but I have to somehow and clumsily get it out in the open: The beauty of the language drew me, then story held me and hypnotized me. Now I'm transfixed, impaled by the terror and suspense. Ah, William, what you can do with the language I thought I knew.
 

Stew21

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I started my commentary again. I have 8 to do! I didn't realize I'd taken that long of a break.

I'll be back later with two or three. Looking forward to digging in.
 

CassandraW

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William, have you considered recording more of Thorn Forest? I've checked your sound link from time to time in hopes you would.

It begs to be heard, and you read so nicely.
 

CassandraW

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damn. I'd planned to ask for his phone number.
 

cray

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no,..it's excellent as i was planning on killing the voice actor!
 

CassandraW

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this is why we can't have nice things.
 

cray

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it is in our nature to kill nice things, isn't it?
 

CassandraW

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certainly, if we're going to wear them or eat them.

this was simply a waste.
 

CassandraW

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I'm on read three -- will comment in detail later. But one immediate thought -- I am truly loving how you're working out the Jacob/animal metaphor.


ETA:

and the use of the word "qedesha." Nice. Very nice. And Anna's face, and his reaction to it. Nice. And her reaction to his reaction. And the contrast with Jacob's reaction. Very, very, very nice.

those knowing, profane
curls in the corners
of lips too red
for morning

You've outdone yourself here.


Anyway. More later.
 
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Kylabelle

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"sacred satisfaction" is a masterful phrase.