I just updated my Amazon 'About the Author' bio ... is this too silly?

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StreetCalledHaight

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I don't know if this has any bearing on how many books I sell, but this is what I wrote. If it makes me come across as too weird to look into, please tell me:

Dan Haight doesn't think you're going to read any of this, so he's going to have fun with it before binge-watching 'Firefly' ... again.

In a world where where nice guys are trodden underfoot, Dan Haight is the 'scariest nice guy you'll ever know.' He's been known to send pizzas to sick kids in hospitals, make viral videos about actual viruses and write anonymous letters to the editor that includes evidence proving you tried to sneak 11 items through the 10-items-or-less lane at the grocery store.

He also tells interesting stories that keep your attention. He laughs at danger, mostly because it's a word that sounds funny when pronounced in Esperanto. Just try it ... danĝero ... it's hysterical! He once sued someone for liking the song "American Pie" by Don McLean and he keeps Gulf War Mine Field Tape in his garage ... just in case.

Dan Haight once tried to get his Associates Degree from the International Correspondence School but got thrown out because he wouldn't stop crank calling Sally Struthers. Dan Haight thinks gift cards are a fad, and he's right.

Your comments are welcome.
 

Brightdreamer

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If your books are irreverent and silly, maybe this would work. But if you're pitching that sci-fi thriller series you mentioned in another thread with this kind of author bio, I'd wonder if this is typical of your writing style, and probably pass.

IMHO, it sounds like you're trying too hard to be clever. I'd suggest keeping it as simple and neat as possible.
 

Nymtoc

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I agree with Brightdreamer ^. It sounds like you're trying to hard to be clever. Instead of trying to make me think you're pretending to be weird in order to catch my attention, I think you'd do better to be fairly straightforward, with maybe a touch or two of wit. I see that you have several books on Amazon. Referring to your prior successes might be a better way to go. :cool:
 

Cassiopeia

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I would recommend you visit some famous author bios and see what they say and then remember, they can get away with clever because well..they're famous.

This doesn't seem appropriate. I'm sorry.

On a positive note, you are entertaining. :)
 

Sonsofthepharaohs

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I think you come across as either slightly demented, or really a bit too impressed with your own hilariousness. Or both.
 

quicklime

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IMHO, it sounds like you're trying too hard to be clever. I'd suggest keeping it as simple and neat as possible.


this; I don't know that I have ever read an author bio before buying the book, but if I read that one I'd shelve the book, strongly suspecting the author was going to be too preciously self-aware for the story to hold me
 

StreetCalledHaight

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Good points, guys and gals, thanks for the feedback. I changed it back to what I had before:

"I write unique stories for real people."

Daniel Haight is an emerging writer whose credits include the Flotilla series and many published short stories. As a native of the San Francisco Bay Area, he refers to himself as a 'blue collar geek' with a passion for writing, working with his hands and being a dad. A former disk jockey, Dan is talking about the Flotilla series on radio and podcast shows all over the world. He works as a 'computer guy' during the day and writes at night.
 

Nymtoc

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This one ^ works for me. "Emerging writer" engages my interest, and the mention of your other works leads me to think I might be interested in this one. Good job. :)
 

Sonsofthepharaohs

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Much better. Now I think 'serious writer' not in the 'has no sense of humour' way, but in the 'is professional and serious about the craft' way. But it still shows that you're a person with a real life and interests outside writing. I'd much rather buy a book from him than from the drunk 12 year old that wrote the other bio ;)
 

Rebekkamaria

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I have to agree that the second bio is much better. Less is more in this case too. :)
 

Mclesh

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I also prefer the second. I'm not a fan of serious writer bios, but the first seemed too frenetic. The second, your original, gives a sense of who you are.
 

Lady MacBeth

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The second one is more appropriate, but I did enjoy reading your first version. :)
 

Donkey

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The second bio works. The first one reads like the author ate too much Halloween candy.

Side note: ANYBODY who binge-watches 'Firefly' ... again, is okay in my book. If you were running for office, I might be swayed. :D
 
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