Detective 12 - Thoughts on AI Agents

Cornelius Gault · Jan 20, 2015

In my novel Detective 12, I have the POV character dealing with his ubiquitous computer, which responds mostly verbally.

Question 1: How can a lengthy dialog (1 page at a time, several dialogs) be formatted to show this? What is most common?

Question 2: A POV Character (actually an AI Agent) is responding as though he is a person. I have tried to use terms that would apply to people and computers equally so the Reader will not immediately know that it is a computer speaking. BTW: The computer does not have emotions and does not want to kill mankind.

Any comments?

Question 3: I want to show the actions that the computer AI takes to accomplish a technical scene, rather than just say "the computer went POOF and it happened". Any thoughts?

Samsonet · Jan 20, 2015

I don't think I really understand, but for what it's worth:

#1 By lengthy dialogue, do you mean the computer is speaking for a whole page with few of no interruptions by the other character, or that the characters are talking for a long time? In either case I'd say just write it like regular dialogue. You'd probably have to watch out for talking heads, though.

#2 I don't really get why the reader shouldn't know that this character is a computer, if they're going to learn it in that scene. Presumably if the reader picks up this book they know there are AI characters.

#3 What kinds of actions is the computer taking? If you go into too much detail you can lose the reader through confusion or boredom. Something like "Siri translated the voice into code, transmitting the directions to the main computer" can work, but if this goes on for three pages explaining just what the code is and how it works, it might be better to just say what happened.

RobLineberger · Jan 20, 2015

Well, a lot of this really depends on context in your novel, but I will try to answer.

1) Clarity is the key. Lengthy dialogues with the computer could be computer in italics. My novel has some telepathic communication in it and that's how I handled it:

"Computer, tell me how things are going."

"We are a bit behind schedule. It is 72 degrees outside and some of the workers think that makes it acceptable to work, on average, 42 minutes less a day."

"I see. I will talk to them. Anything else?"

"Yes. I have a memory buffer allocation error at address x349G42. Perhaps because you insist on placing your coffee over my circuitry console."

"Sorry, computer."

"I do not believe you."

2) There is a series of books about a bunch of guys who found an elite gentleman's club in London. Stephanie Laurens, maybe? The Bastion Club? There is a big reveal about one of the founders that you don't see coming until the end of book three. He's not a computer or anything, but it might give you some ideas for how to trick the reader.

3) This question is impossible to compute. Inadequate parameters specified.

Cornelius Gault · Jan 21, 2015

More information:

#1. The dialog is mostly in the form of questions and answers, such as "Where is the MC", "Where was his last location", etc, mostly verbally, instead of just Info-Dumping what was discovered by the computer system. I formatted the computer response differently than the human speaking, but I don't know what is more common for other authors in this situations.

#2. The AI was created as an extension of a real person and acts as a "secretary" to the MC. When it interacts with the real world, the real people must believe it is a real person instead of a "computerized recording". To this end, the Reader ALSO does not know at first that it is an AI nor is this implied by the Title nor will it appear in the synopsis. It is not so important that it is or is not an AI, but something that plays an important part toward the end of the plot. There is actually an "onion layer" in which the AI is communicating with an "older style" computer. The Reader might assume that it was a human talking to a computer rather than an advanced AI talking to a computer. No trying to "trick" the Reader, just adding some mystery.

#3. The computer/AI is able to perform actions in the real world and affect other systems. When asked to solve a particular problem, it indicates various things that it is doing (some of which are pretty important to the plot) to accomplish the user's request.

Introversion · Jan 21, 2015

Cornelius Gault said:
#2. The AI was created as an extension of a real person and acts as a "secretary" to the MC. When it interacts with the real world, the real people must believe it is a real person instead of a "computerized recording". To this end, the Reader ALSO does not know at first that it is an AI nor is this implied by the Title nor will it appear in the synopsis. It is not so important that it is or is not an AI, but something that plays an important part toward the end of the plot. There is actually an "onion layer" in which the AI is communicating with an "older style" computer. The Reader might assume that it was a human talking to a computer rather than an advanced AI talking to a computer. No trying to "trick" the Reader, just adding some mystery.

I'm a little confused. You seem to have conflicting desires?

If you want the reader not to realize that it's a computer speaking, then why format its dialog differently? Wouldn't you want to the appearance of a normal conversation? I assume you want the AI to respond fluently and colloquially, to pass as human?

"Hey, was the victim at Stanley's Pub last night?"

"Hang on, I'll check. No, they say their cameras didn't spot him."

If you formatted the second sentence differently, it'll seem odd. Unless you're trying to suggest that the other speaker is perhaps not in the room?

And if the AI isn't fluent, then formatting its responses differently seems redundant?

"Hey, was the victim at Stanley's Pub last night?"

"I will inquire. Inquiry complete: Negative."

Cornelius Gault · Jan 21, 2015

@Introversion: I tried to explain in Message #4 above, but I think I just got confused.

The AI (which seems to the Reader to be a person) is shown as the speaker, normal dialog formatting style. It is conversing with an obviously old-style computer, which has a different formatting style.

So far in the story, there is no conversation between the AI and humans, but this would appear like a conversation between two people, since the people talking to it wouldn't know it was an AI.

That's why I said there was an "onion layer" (from Shrek). The AI (which may or may not know it is an AI) must interact with the Host Computer to query the outside world and, perhaps, make interaction with the outside world (other than phone calls). The Host Computer would be a "filter" to allow it to perform its functions, but not do anything dangerous to the MC ... perhaps it has the Three Laws (undetermined).

I hope that is clear as mud now.

PeteMC · Jan 22, 2015

Cornelius Gault said:
To this end, the Reader ALSO does not know at first that it is an AI nor is this implied by the Title nor will it appear in the synopsis. It is not so important that it is or is not an AI, but something that plays an important part toward the end of the plot.

Just a thought, but if this plays an important part towards the end of the plot then it really needs to be in the synopsis. That's not the place to be mysterious.

Once! · Jan 22, 2015

Not sure I entirely follow, but I will have a go.

As far as I can tell, your computers are all characters in the story. I think you have two computers. So why not report their speech as if they were human characters? You can denote which is speaking by speech tags and/or by giving them a unique speaking style.

Your three questions:

1. Lengthy dialogues are generally not a good thing because the reader gets bored easily. You can break the dialogue up into paragraphs which helps a bit. But on the whole I'd be wary about more than a paragraph of uninterrupted speech.

2. Misleading the reader is dangerous. We might think we are being clever, but the reader could quickly get frustrated. Can your POV character see the AI agent for what he/she/it is? If so, tell the reader.

3. The computer is a character. Treat it like any other character - a mix of actions and speech.

Or maybe put some of your writing into SYW and we can see what you are trying to do? It's a bit hard to comment on these general questions.

Detective 12 - Thoughts on AI Agents

Cornelius Gault

New writer since 07/2012.

Samsonet

Just visiting

RobLineberger

Cornelius Gault

New writer since 07/2012.

Introversion

Pie aren't squared, pie are round!

Cornelius Gault

New writer since 07/2012.

PeteMC

@PeteMC666

Once!

Still confused by shoelaces