- Joined
- Feb 5, 2009
- Messages
- 139
- Reaction score
- 11
In a one-chapter critique, (I was doing a one-for-one with this person), I had someone mention that they wanted several things that I'm finding questionable. Maybe I'm wrong or maybe I'm not - so I thought I'd ask here before I make any changes (or don't make changes) to anything.
1) The reader wanted the character described out (physically) in full before the 1000 word mark, including facial features, height, and exact manner of dress. I do make brief mention of key features (black hair whipping in the wind, Threk-hide duster and a few pieces of his gear he's using), but given the content of the scene, I'm not sure where or why a full description of this character (it is third person POV) would be needed. You do get a better impression of this character's exact appearance in another chapter (different POV). I guess I'm just not sure if I should try to slide this in or if it would be unneeded.
2) He wants me to name this character's mule, stating "everyone loves an animal to have a name". While I understand this request, my MC just is -not- the type to name animals. He simply calls her "Molly" when he addresses her specifically (molly being the term for female mule). Should I go ahead and break character to give this mule a name or stick with my MC not being the type to give her a name?
3) Changes in dialogue. This one was what really sort of nagged at me. I feel I know this POV character very well and know what he would say/think in certain situations. While I'd be fine with and appreciate input on parts where dialogue seems clunky, I'm not sure I want to actually make the -specific- dialogue changes that this reader is suggesting. This POV swears a lot when he's angry, for example. The reader didn't like that and thought I should nix the swearing or make up original swear words. Another suggestion he had: my character has a private thought: What a mess. The reader wants it to be: Oh no, what did "name" get himself into this time? ... but I just don't see the character having such a quaint thought as that.
On the fence. Not sure what to do. Do I take the suggestions or stick with my guns on the specifics here?
Help.
1) The reader wanted the character described out (physically) in full before the 1000 word mark, including facial features, height, and exact manner of dress. I do make brief mention of key features (black hair whipping in the wind, Threk-hide duster and a few pieces of his gear he's using), but given the content of the scene, I'm not sure where or why a full description of this character (it is third person POV) would be needed. You do get a better impression of this character's exact appearance in another chapter (different POV). I guess I'm just not sure if I should try to slide this in or if it would be unneeded.
2) He wants me to name this character's mule, stating "everyone loves an animal to have a name". While I understand this request, my MC just is -not- the type to name animals. He simply calls her "Molly" when he addresses her specifically (molly being the term for female mule). Should I go ahead and break character to give this mule a name or stick with my MC not being the type to give her a name?
3) Changes in dialogue. This one was what really sort of nagged at me. I feel I know this POV character very well and know what he would say/think in certain situations. While I'd be fine with and appreciate input on parts where dialogue seems clunky, I'm not sure I want to actually make the -specific- dialogue changes that this reader is suggesting. This POV swears a lot when he's angry, for example. The reader didn't like that and thought I should nix the swearing or make up original swear words. Another suggestion he had: my character has a private thought: What a mess. The reader wants it to be: Oh no, what did "name" get himself into this time? ... but I just don't see the character having such a quaint thought as that.
On the fence. Not sure what to do. Do I take the suggestions or stick with my guns on the specifics here?
Help.
Last edited: