Stupid things non-writers say

Tiger · Nov 29, 2006

Take a look at the "Story Research..." area of AW. This is a clear enough indication that writers have no problem with asking about--or writing about--areas outside of their professions. I do it all the time.

Not one of the people I've ever interviewed or asked for information professionally or out of simple curiosity has ever given me the slightest indication that they thought me stupid for doing so.

Shadow_Ferret · Nov 29, 2006

Freckles said:
Ohhh, good topic for a thread! My favorite is when my mom asks me, "You're still working on that article?" like I can whip it out in 30 minutes or something!

We writers have a hard life, huh?

You can't? It's not like it's a novel or something. :tongue

Bubastes · Nov 29, 2006

Tiger said:
Take a look at the "Story Research..." area of AW. This is a clear enough indication that writers have no problem with asking about--or writing about--areas outside of their professions. I do it all the time.

Not one of the people I've ever interviewed or asked for information professionally or out of simple curiosity has ever given me the slightest indication that they thought me stupid for doing so.

You're assuming that (1) people are asking us questions and (2) if so, are interested in the answer. My little rant is over stupid comments, not questions, from people that prefer spouting over listening. It actually involves only a few people in my life, but I was in a cranky mood this a.m.

Tiger · Nov 29, 2006

MeowGirl said:
I have no problems with questions that show a genuine interest in what I do (you know, the kind that writers ask).

Well, yes: writers ask questions for a living--they're better at it than most people. It's expected of them.

An old idea maybe, but it serves: hearing two thousand people ask one question (or make one observation) is not the same as hearing one person doing same two thousand times.

Just my two pennies.

awatkins · Nov 29, 2006

"So when are you going to write a real book?"

'cause everybody knows nonfiction books aren't real books....

soloset · Nov 29, 2006

Delarege said:
But, but but...writing isn't a job.

I know people that think it doesn't matter how much money you have or make. If you aren't in the work force you're a bum.

I'm fortunate; my folks (okay, my in-laws, but I think of them as my folks) don't care what I do as long as I'm making enough money that we're comfortable.

Tiger · Nov 29, 2006

MeowGirl said:
You're assuming that (1) people are asking us questions and (2) if so, are interested in the answer. My little rant is over stupid comments, not questions, from people that prefer spouting over listening.

They're not stupid for asking questions. They're stupid for acting like know-it-alls.

Sorry, my last post went up before I read yours.

Don't get me wrong, I was not responding to your original post, specifically. There have been plenty of complaints about questions.

Of course, I agree with you about know-it-alls (knows-it-all?). My thought was only that the intent of most people is probably not to be insulting. They're probably just trying to make conversation.

-D

soloset · Nov 29, 2006

Tiger said:
Of course, I agree with you about know-it-alls (knows-it-all?). My thought was only that the intent of most people is probably not to be insulting. They're probably just trying to make conversation.

-D

Exactly. At least they're trying to relate, and at least they're dimly aware of what's important to you even if it's not important to them. Reverse the situation, and you have me trying to discuss football with my father-in-law.

I guess I can just think of at least half a dozen times when I said something clueless and inadvertently insulting to someone in another profession, regretted it, but couldn't think of a graceful way to correct myself and had to let it stand between us.

(I've always found the "I have this great idea; you write it and we'll split the profits!" thing hilarious, though.)

Christine N. · Nov 29, 2006

Wow, what would people think of me, sitting at home all day, working, and, yanno, getting pretty decent sized checks in the mail every couple of weeks?

My very favorite:

Me, sitting at a table at a signing event
Person who is sans-clues: "So, you wrote this?"
Me: Uh-huh.
Captain Clueless: "How much did you have to pay?"

Happens more times than I care to count. I get asked this all. the. time.

It's sad.

jbal · Nov 29, 2006

Christine-really? What is that supposed to mean? Like you paid to write it?

victoriastrauss · Nov 29, 2006

Kate Thornton said:
"So you're a writer. Have I heard of you?"

Oooh, that makes me crazy. Especially if I've just introduced myself. Duh. I told you my name ten seconds ago--you figure it out.

Here's one that irritates me.

Stranger at party: "So you're a fantasy writer? I loved Harry Potter!"

Me: "Me too. So you're a fantasy fan?"

Stranger at party: "Nah, I never read that stuff."

There are also the people who assume that "fantasy" means "sex fantasy." On my way to this year's World Fantasy Convention I met a woman who was oddly curious about what I was going to be doing there, and it was several minutes before it dawned on me that she was imagining an entire convention of erotica writers (and associated merchandise).

- Victoria

CaroGirl · Nov 29, 2006

This falls squarely in the clueless camp. I love my friend, but she's clueless about writing.

Clueless Friend: "How's the writing going?"
Me: "Great. My writing group is putting together a short-story anthology."
Clueless Friend: "Ah. What's an anthology?"

Keep in mind, she's a math major. If she told me about graphing exponential integers or something, my eyes would glaze over before she got out the first word. To each her own.

I get the "Where do you get your ideas?" question a lot too. Mostly courtesy of my SIL. "I buy them off a guy on the corner from the back of his truck."

sassandgroove · Nov 29, 2006

I get a lot of "Will I recognize myself in your story?" and "You writin' about me?"

Um...no.

Bubastes · Nov 29, 2006

soloset said:
Exactly. At least they're trying to relate, and at least they're dimly aware of what's important to you even if it's not important to them. Reverse the situation, and you have me trying to discuss football with my father-in-law.

OMG, if you only knew how many hours I've had to endure listening to my Dad talk about his work, his opinions on stuff, and his political views. I kid you not, he talks for 20-30 minutes at a stretch about himself. I've timed him. If you're lucky, you might get in a minute edgewise between stretches, but no matter what you say, he shifts the topic to his opinion on what you should be doing with your life, then back to himself. Ah well, he's a professor, so he's used to talking in other people's sleep.

Depending on my mood, I find it endearing or irritating. My Mom, on the other hand, can go for hours without saying a word, no doubt because of Dad's annoying conversation habits. The sad part is, he doesn't notice. He talks enough for the three of us at dinner parties, and then some.

Tiger · Nov 29, 2006

MeowGirl said:
OMG, if you only knew how many hours I've had to endure listening to my Dad talk about his work, his opinions on stuff, and his political views. I kid you not, he talks for 20-30 minutes at a stretch about himself and his opinions.

Okay... Now I understand. Sorry. I gotta dad too. He believes it's his job to know more than his kids.

Have you ever had someone (non-writer) suggest strongly, or demand, that you write on a particular point of view?

-D

Shadow_Ferret · Nov 29, 2006

Kate Thornton said:
"So you're a writer. Have I heard of you?"

Or the "Have I read any of your stuff?"

Now that's just stupid on so many levels.

Scrawler · Nov 29, 2006

What do you do?
I'm a writer.
Cool! For which studio?
or
What do you do?
I'm a writer.
Cool! On what show?
or
What do you do?
I'm a writer.
Cool! Who's your agent?

(one of the perks of living in Los Angeles!)

Tiger · Nov 29, 2006

soloset said:
Exactly. At least they're trying to relate, and at least they're dimly aware of what's important to you even if it's not important to them. Reverse the situation, and you have me trying to discuss football with my father-in-law.

Argh. I've given up on trying to understand half of the subjects I took stabs at--football among them. I just don't grok.

Hell to me would be having to write a book about football.

-D

Bubastes · Nov 29, 2006

Tiger said:
Okay... Now I understand. Sorry. I gotta dad too. He believes it's his job to know more than his kids.

Have you ever had someone (non-writer) suggest strongly, or demand, that you write on a particular point of view?

-D

For non-day job writing, no, but if someone did I'd tell him/her to write it himself/herself if they feel so darn strongly about it. Or pay me double.

For day job writing, of course. I'm a lawyer.

Tiger · Nov 29, 2006

Scrawler said:
What do you do?
I'm a writer.
Cool! For which studio?
or
What do you do?
I'm a writer.
Cool! On what show?
or
What do you do?
I'm a writer.
Cool! Who's your agent?

(one of the perks of living in Los Angeles!)

What do you do?
I'm an actor.
Cool! At what restaurant?

Tiger · Nov 29, 2006

MeowGirl said:
For non-day job writing, no, but if someone did I'd tell him/her to write it himself/herself if they feel so darn strongly about it. Or pay me double.

For day job writing, of course. I'm a lawyer.

I work on a magazine for teenagers. I've had my share of strong suggestions. Talk about people who have no clue about why we write. Sometimes it's difficult to explain:

Tho' the word 'public' is in 'publication.' We don't acknowledge any 'right' of yours to be represented by us
Your idea may be important to you, but would make for dull/inappropriate/controversial copy--no matter how it's spun
Yes, we respect peoples' opinions, but ultimately the choice for what I write and how it's written is mine and my editor's

-D

Christine N. · Nov 29, 2006

jbal said:
Christine-really? What is that supposed to mean? Like you paid to write it?

No, like how much did I pay to have it published.

Really.

Provrb1810meggy · Nov 29, 2006

Guy in Class: What are you doing?
Me: Working on my novel.
Guy in Class: That's weird.
Me: Why?
Guy in Class: You write for fun.
Me: So?
Guy in Class: Only authors write for fun.
Me: *eye roll* How do you think the authors became authors? They would've had to write before some paid them to do it.
Guy in Class: *blank look*

sassandgroove · Nov 29, 2006

Only authors write for fun, ergo you are an author. Yet he didn't make the connection.

Alan Yee · Nov 29, 2006

Christine N. said:
No, like how much did I pay to have it published.

Really.

Oh yes, though some clueless newbies still ask that question sometimes. While we're on that subject, some advice for the lurkers:

Yog's Law: Money always flows toward the writer.

Also, Ann Crispin's article on that question, appropriately titled, "Excuse Me, How Much Did It Cost You?"

(I know most of you know this already, but I'm just doing it on the hope that some lurker sees it and runs away from harm.)

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