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Just needing some feedback about what I'm doing with my WIP, Second Saviour: Celestial Fortress.
You know how books always start? Cover, legal stuff, then the name of the book again, then the full opening page.
I know this isn't a revolutionary idea and all, many others have done what I'm attempting to do in their own books.
What I'm attempting to do is write some short poems and put them at the start of each chapter, the prologue and the epilogue. The poems not other's poems but poems I've created to add a bit to the lore and depth of the book's universe.
Not sure I can do this on this type of post, but I'll attempt to do it anyway.
This is how it'd go...
Prologue
“When earth and sky move, the Celestial Fortress shall appear. Bringing chaos from beyond the clouds...
Skies shall shake. Earth shall tremble. Castella shall arrive. The Celestial Fortress peaks towards the heavens of Epsellar. Eclipsing the sun.
Run, run, mortals for the inhabitants of the Celestial, are nothing you have seen on this earth.
They smell of rotting flesh, with devil's horns and foul breath. They attempt to break your skull and drink the blood from your veins.
They can sense you a mile away. So know when you see Castella, the Celestial Fortress up above. You are doomed...”
(Translated from an ancient rune found in the Saviour's Sanctuary
by Herman Ckiles.)
It was a chilly morning, the sun had barely risen in the sky. Looking left and right, everyone was wrapped up in thick coats with scarves around their necks. With myself however, I had nothing but a tattered top and ripped bottoms. Shivering, I looked across the street to where the smells of freshly made food were coming from.
The first part of course being the chapter/prologue/epilogue and all.
Second the actual poem, that has something to do with the plot and/or part of the world I've set my characters in. Maybe even history of the world.
Third being some extra parts, mostly even more added lore and history to the world.
After that you'd turn the page or something like that and actually get the full writing of that part such being fourth part.
Feedback is mostly the question is it a good idea to do it for each chapter? A bad idea?
If I end up getting some comments saying it'd be best not to do it every chapter as it would get you out the rhythm...
Would it be okay to just do a single poem at the start of the book? Possibly the end as well then leave it at that?
You could say I'm possibly over thinking it, and I admit I might be. Though sometimes can't help it with my autism and all.
Anyway thank you for reading, and if you do, thanks to the feedback as well!
Also if it's illegal in forum terms to post some of the poem and part of the start of the my book in this post, just pm me or something and I'll edit it to the right standards. No need to delete it. Thanks again!
You know how books always start? Cover, legal stuff, then the name of the book again, then the full opening page.
I know this isn't a revolutionary idea and all, many others have done what I'm attempting to do in their own books.
What I'm attempting to do is write some short poems and put them at the start of each chapter, the prologue and the epilogue. The poems not other's poems but poems I've created to add a bit to the lore and depth of the book's universe.
Not sure I can do this on this type of post, but I'll attempt to do it anyway.
This is how it'd go...
Prologue
“When earth and sky move, the Celestial Fortress shall appear. Bringing chaos from beyond the clouds...
Skies shall shake. Earth shall tremble. Castella shall arrive. The Celestial Fortress peaks towards the heavens of Epsellar. Eclipsing the sun.
Run, run, mortals for the inhabitants of the Celestial, are nothing you have seen on this earth.
They smell of rotting flesh, with devil's horns and foul breath. They attempt to break your skull and drink the blood from your veins.
They can sense you a mile away. So know when you see Castella, the Celestial Fortress up above. You are doomed...”
(Translated from an ancient rune found in the Saviour's Sanctuary
by Herman Ckiles.)
It was a chilly morning, the sun had barely risen in the sky. Looking left and right, everyone was wrapped up in thick coats with scarves around their necks. With myself however, I had nothing but a tattered top and ripped bottoms. Shivering, I looked across the street to where the smells of freshly made food were coming from.
The first part of course being the chapter/prologue/epilogue and all.
Second the actual poem, that has something to do with the plot and/or part of the world I've set my characters in. Maybe even history of the world.
Third being some extra parts, mostly even more added lore and history to the world.
After that you'd turn the page or something like that and actually get the full writing of that part such being fourth part.
Feedback is mostly the question is it a good idea to do it for each chapter? A bad idea?
If I end up getting some comments saying it'd be best not to do it every chapter as it would get you out the rhythm...
Would it be okay to just do a single poem at the start of the book? Possibly the end as well then leave it at that?
You could say I'm possibly over thinking it, and I admit I might be. Though sometimes can't help it with my autism and all.
Anyway thank you for reading, and if you do, thanks to the feedback as well!
Also if it's illegal in forum terms to post some of the poem and part of the start of the my book in this post, just pm me or something and I'll edit it to the right standards. No need to delete it. Thanks again!
