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beta swap: romance/fantasy

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Viridian

local good boy
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I'm seeking an additional pair of eyes, and I'm willing to swap.

The query: Morality is all relative. At least, that’s what Regis tells himself. He’s been working for a witch since he was a kid; he helped her put Queen Isolde into a coma; and, soon, he’s going to commit his first murder.

A few years back, a vigilante named Jonathan White hid the queen’s unconscious body. Now he’s another victim of the witch, rotting away in a locked tower. Regis has his orders: “rescue” Jonathan, find out where the queen is hidden, and then slit Jonathan’s throat. Simple, until Regis actually meets Jonathan. Jonathan is no typical fairytale hero — he lies, he cheats. He feeds his enemies to his dragon. Worse, he’s handsome. Falling for him would be a terrible mistake.

Regis has never made good life choices.

Regis swore a magical oath — he’s compelled to find the queen, and once he does, he’ll be forced to carry out his next promise: killing Jonathan. Defying the oathspell causes crippling pain. In order to keep both himself and Jonathan alive, he’ll have to betray his boss, break an unbreakable spell, and save the queen… all without letting Jonathan know the truth.

Totaling 55,000 words, BAD MAGIC is a romance/fantasy novel with a touch of erotica.

What I’m looking for: general advice and reactions. Plot holes, incontinuity, characterization, ect.

What I can offer you: I’m willing to give the same in return. I give plain, straightforward critique. I'd prefer a partner who writes adventurous or romantic material (if you write both, we are clearly meant to be). PM me and we'll see if we're a good fit.

My first chapter can be found here.
 
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