My-Spouse-is-a-Vegetarian Support Group

Hoplite · Mar 6, 2014

Hello all fellow omnivores and carnivores,

I don't know how many AWers are in the same position as I, but I thought I start this thread to find out and provide a place for us all to commiserate together and perhaps share recipes that make having a vegetarian (or vegan) significant other more bearable. We can also share the last and/or best meat dish we had. [Note that I love my wife, and appreciate her concern for our health (I freely admit the vegetarian diet is one of the healthiest), but I really look forward to the times when we go out and I can get meat.]

So, to kick off: I've been married to my vegetarian for about 2.5 years. I've more-or-less been vegetarian myself for about the past 3 years. I'm well past the point of craving meat, and in fact can't eat more than 1 serving in a sitting without getting physically sick. Most days the food is great (we both cook vegetarian meals) but there are some things I still haven't developed a taste for (I'm looking at you, kale salad!). I've found that mushrooms provide a good meaty texture and flavor to most dishes, especially porcini mushrooms.

It has been approximately 2 months since I last had meat. It was Thai-cashew chicken.

Haggis · Mar 6, 2014

I suppose bacon is out of the question.

Hoplite · Mar 6, 2014

Haggis said:
I suppose bacon is out of the question.

That's actually not something I miss. I was never very keen for bacon...and the smell of red meat cooking makes the misses nauseous...so yeah...it's way out of the question.

Haggis · Mar 6, 2014

We've got a lot of veggies here who will likely be happy to help.

mccardey · Mar 6, 2014

Hoplite said:
but there are some things I still haven't developed a taste for (I'm looking at you, kale salad!). .

Have you been doing it properly? Shredding it really really thinly, salting it, dressing with oil, letting it sit overnight, adding balsamic vinegar and toasted pinenuts and paperthin slices of spanish onions and that stuff?

It's - just - it's my favourite eating, that's all. Just entirely my favourite eating.

I'm the other half of your problem, btw. Although I will eat meat to be polite, I would never choose to.

alleycat · Mar 6, 2014

I guess shooting them is out of the question . . .

mccardey · Mar 6, 2014

alleycat said:
I guess shooting them is out of the question . . .

Actually, I sometimes get the feeling the jury's still out on that...

Hoplite · Mar 6, 2014

mccardey said:
Have you been doing it properly? Shredding it really really thinly, salting it, dressing with oil, letting it sit overnight, adding balsamic vinegar and toasted pinenuts and paperthin slices of spanish onions and that stuff?

I have never heard of that...but it sounds really good!

We've taken to eating mushrooms only within the past month or so. Haven't had much time to try different things other than just sauteing them in some oil.

sunandshadow · Mar 6, 2014

(As an aside from cooking, but relevant to writing at least...)
I keep being surprised how the difficulties between vegetarians and non-vegetarians never seem to pop up in fiction. Neither seriously nor played for humor. I've seen a few books where the topic is mentioned briefly then immediately glossed over. Have never seen a book where people on one side are pressuring someone on the other side, and this is a thing that happens all the time in reality! Is it a taboo topic, or just boring?

Fruitbat · Mar 6, 2014

sunandshadow said:
(As an aside from cooking, but relevant to writing at least...)
I keep being surprised how the difficulties between vegetarians and non-vegetarians never seem to pop up in fiction. Neither seriously nor played for humor. I've seen a few books where the topic is mentioned briefly then immediately glossed over. Have never seen a book where people on one side are pressuring someone on the other side, and this is a thing that happens all the time in reality! Is it a taboo topic, or just boring?

Ooh, good idea. I could see it highlighting that two people just do not get along. I think it could be a hilarious story.

blacbird · Mar 7, 2014

Lentils. Lots of great Indian food is based on lentils, and they are about the most protein-rich vegetables imaginable. I'm not a vegetarian, but I don't eat much red meat at all, and do vegetarian meals with regularity. Lentils (and other legumes) are a primary ingredient in most of these meals.

caw

Putputt · Mar 7, 2014

sunandshadow said:
(As an aside from cooking, but relevant to writing at least...)
I keep being surprised how the difficulties between vegetarians and non-vegetarians never seem to pop up in fiction. Neither seriously nor played for humor. I've seen a few books where the topic is mentioned briefly then immediately glossed over. Have never seen a book where people on one side are pressuring someone on the other side, and this is a thing that happens all the time in reality! Is it a taboo topic, or just boring?

I dated a vegetarian guy and lived with him for about a year, and although we had other issues, our diets were never a problem. Neither one of us tried to convert the other, and whenever we went out for meals, we made sure there were vege options available. We lived in Norcal then, where most places had vege options, so this was easy enough. I mostly cooked vegetarian so we could share our meals, but when I craved meat, he was fine with cooking his own meal. It's funny, when I heard of couples fighting over their vegetarian/non-vege diets, I was so surprised. I don't think I could live with someone who would push/guilt me into going vegetarian. That could be a really fun novel to write!

ETA: my favorite thing to do with kale is to bake them into kale chips. They taste almost like seaweed when baked. Mr. Putt thought it would taste weird, but he's a convert!

EMaree · Mar 7, 2014

Not a veggie, but I'm trying out a lot of veggie cooking to introduce vegetables to my very Scottish, very anti-fruit-and-veg other half.

Spicy dishes with chickpeas are amazing. I'll link you to the Ilumi meal page of some of my favorites, because they list all the ingredients and are quite easy to DIY: veg & chickpea jalfrezi, Spanish style rice and veg, Moroccan tagine, and Harira soup (very spicy).

Chickpeas, cannellini beans, haricot beans etc are the best for adding good bulk and texture to veggie meals. And spice really makes the world of difference.

I made Chuck Wendig's sausage and kale soup last night, which would probably work well with Quorn sausage. there's a veg soup recipe below it as well. Replace chicken stock for veg stock and you're golden.

Sometimes I browse the menus of big vegetarian restaurants for inspiration too.

Spinach lasagna rolls are nice and easy to make at home. (This recipe is aimed for bulk cooking, but there are loads on Google.)

mccardey said:
Have you been doing it properly? Shredding it really really thinly, salting it, dressing with oil, letting it sit overnight, adding balsamic vinegar and toasted pinenuts and paperthin slices of spanish onions and that stuff?

It's - just - it's my favourite eating, that's all. Just entirely my favourite eating.

I'm the other half of your problem, btw. Although I will eat meat to be polite, I would never choose to.

Oooh. I don't like the taste of raw Kale, but that sounds quite nice.

cornflake · Mar 7, 2014

Putputt said:
I dated a vegetarian guy and lived with him for about a year, and although we had other issues, our diets were never a problem. Neither one of us tried to convert the other, and whenever we went out for meals, we made sure there were vege options available. We lived in Norcal then, where most places had vege options, so this was easy enough. I mostly cooked vegetarian so we could share our meals, but when I craved meat, he was fine with cooking his own meal. It's funny, when I heard of couples fighting over their vegetarian/non-vege diets, I was so surprised. I don't think I could live with someone who would push/guilt me into going vegetarian. That could be a really fun novel to write!

ETA: my favorite thing to do with kale is to bake them into kale chips. They taste almost like seaweed when baked. Mr. Putt thought it would taste weird, but he's a convert!

I don't think it's necessarily about pushing one another to be veg or not, but there are some people for whom it just wouldn't work well.

No one is cooking meat in my house (or bringing it in or etc.). When outside, obviously, adults are free to eat whatever they want, but not in my house. It's not in a contentious way, just is what it is.

I've known other people who would have trouble eating a vegetarian diet, not for a physical reason, but because they prefer mostly meat. They move in with a vegetarian and everyone is always cooking either two things, or for themselves only, and not sharing meals and it can become contentious or whatever.

Some people live in that mixed veg/not situation fine, and eat mostly veg meals, one will grill chicken and stick it on top of whatever, and they're both cool with it. Some people aren't though, even if they don't want to change the partner's diet.

mirandashell · Mar 7, 2014

Sometimes it also comes down to a power play. One partner insisting on it being their way and not compromising at all. And that's more about the relationship than it is the diet.

ap123 · Mar 7, 2014

I'm a vegetarian, have been since I was a teen. My husband is not, 2 of my 3 kids are not.

Never been a problem, I cook meat for them (less frequently now that my boys are away at school), most meals are fairly easy to adapt.

When cooking veg meals, I think it's important to keep depth of flavors in mind. I do a lot of cooking with wines, tons of garlic, mushrooms for "meatiness," beans for protein, etc.

Lavern08 · Mar 7, 2014

ap123 said:
... I do a lot of cooking with wines, tons of garlic, mushrooms for "meatiness," beans for protein, etc.

While I'm not a vegetarian, I do lurve me some mushrooms - I call it "the best, tastiest meat substitute."

Haggis · Mar 7, 2014

Lavern08 said:
While I'm not a vegetarian, I do lurve me some mushrooms - I call it "the best, tastiest meat substitute."

I love 'em too, Vernie. I also lurves me some eggplant.

cray · Mar 7, 2014

i'm just here to say that kale sucks too.

i have no idea who decided that kale was food.
it's not.

you guys can be mad at me now.

Kylabelle · Mar 7, 2014

Mmm. Mushrooms. Big portabellas, sauted in olive oil, yummers.

My sister is vegetarian and has been since she was a child, living in a family of meat eaters then and now. She cooked meat meals for her kids while they were growing up, and seems to have no problem with it.

There is packaged vegetable broth on the market now that I actually like better than the same brands of chicken broth, by the way, as a soup base. I find using bay leaves liberally in soup and bean dishes is a great way to add that depth of flavor.

I made a point of getting some bacon a couple of weeks ago; had not had any in years and was craving it. The first few slices were extremely awesome and after that, it was just not that tasty. I don't know but I think I may have been cured of bacon.

Hoplite, do you two eat fish?

Haggis · Mar 7, 2014

I love greens, especially with pork, but kale is a tad bitter for me. I can eat it but it's not a favorite.

ap123 · Mar 7, 2014

cray said:
i'm just here to say that kale sucks too.

i have no idea who decided that kale was food.
it's not.

you guys can be mad at me now.

You are mistaken, sir. Kale is delicious AND nutritious. (but not raw, I have to agree with you there)

Link to blog post showing dinner where I last used kale. Tell me that isn't food.

cray · Mar 7, 2014

i gotta hand it to you...
anyone who can make kale look like a bouquet of flowers is pretty awesome!

Kylabelle · Mar 7, 2014

cray said:
i'm just here to say that kale sucks too.

i have no idea who decided that kale was food.
it's not.

So, you prefer mustard and turnip greens perhaps? Cooked with white wine, red pepper flakes, garlic, bay leaves, and a few bits of ham for the non-vegetarians?

Haggis · Mar 7, 2014

cray said:
i gotta hand it to you...
anyone who can make kale look like a bouquet of flowers is pretty awesome!

Perhaps if we wrapped it in bacon....

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