Struggling with action sequences

I think you can find a lot of freedom in concentrating on the effects of combat, not so much on the mechanics. At least at the individual level.

I think Elizabeth Moon (a former US Marine) does a good job describing sword-based infantry combat in her Paksenarrion series of books.

Writing The Perfect Scene

I'd suggest reading the whole thing but the relevant parts to this question is covered about half way down under the section called Small-Scale Structure of a Scene.

Once I read and understood that, it brought that trouble spot for me out of the boggy mire and actually made sense.

In fact, I highly recommend that book Randy mentions the idea came out of Techniques of the Selling Writer.

bearilou said:

Writing The Perfect Scene

I'd suggest reading the whole thing but the relevant parts to this question is covered about half way down under the section called Small-Scale Structure of a Scene.

Click to expand...

The MRUs?

As a general principle, this concept is sound, but I disagree rather strenuously with his insistence on the unchangeable order of the Reaction segment. Reflex can absolutely come before Feeling. Anyone who has ever driven a car and had to stop very suddenly can attest to that. You stand on the brakes before you're even aware you moved your foot, and only after that do the feelings come flooding in: fear, anger, relief.

The idea of Scene and Sequel is also a useful one, but writers should keep in mind that a single Scene (that is, a Goal, Conflict, Disaster unit) (though I prefer "Change" to "Disaster," because not every Scene will, or needs to, end in disaster) can stretch over a number of scenes. And sometimes an entire Sequel can be handled in a paragraph.

CrastersBabies said:

...

I write out a diagram (or map) of where the important players are located. Think X's and O's. I then play things out by drawing arrows. As I do this, I take notes. Very basic stuff:
...

Click to expand...

I like this advice in particular. I've done something similar with a few of mine and it's worked incredibly well. I found that it helps me invent a better space for the action that's happening. It seems easier to build in landscape obstacles and realistic locations when I draw out what's happening.

In addition to all the great advice being given I'd also suggest getting close to what you're trying to write. Perhaps attend a paintball match to watch how the players move, shoot and talk to each other. If you've got a martial art club near you, sit in on a class or just go and watch from the chairs.


Best of luck!!
-A

BethS said:

The MRUs?

As a general principle, this concept is sound, but I disagree rather strenuously with his insistence on the unchangeable order of the Reaction segment. Reflex can absolutely come before Feeling. Anyone who has ever driven a car and had to stop very suddenly can attest to that. You stand on the brakes before you're even aware you moved your foot, and only after that do the feelings come flooding in: fear, anger, relief.

Click to expand...

Eh. Not always. There have been times where I've had that fear grip my heart only a beat away from me stomping on the brakes and then bitching at the driver ahead of me for not giving a signal. Feeling/Reflex/Reaction.

So while I get what your saying, even your example is not what all people across the board always feel. I'd agree that it's not stringent and always A then B then C, I'm still convinced it's a good rule of thumb to follow for fiction.

This was actually driven home when I took a few chapters from three different books. Broke out my highlighters and started marking up the M-R-U and found the pattern held true even if it wasn't strenuously followed with rigidity. There were times where there was Feeling/Reaction. Or Feeling/Reflex/Feeling/Reaction. Sometimes Reflex/Reflex/Reaction.

Proving, I guess, that the best way to learn to write something is to study how your favorite authors do it. This article gave me the tools to break it down, see it in action, understand what was happening, understand that the structure doesn't have to be followed rigidly, and took me huge leaps forward.

BethS said:

The idea of Scene and Sequel is also a useful one, but writers should keep in mind that a single Scene (that is, a Goal, Conflict, Disaster unit) (though I prefer "Change" to "Disaster," because not every Scene will, or needs to, end in disaster) can stretch over a number of scenes. And sometimes an entire Sequel can be handled in a paragraph.

Click to expand...

Have I missed it in the article where he said otherwise was true?

Just like with all writing, take what you can use, use it to your best advantage, disregard the rest. The OP was asking for help, I found this helpful, maybe she will find the same. If not, feel free to disregard as complete bunk.

bearilou said:

So while I get what your saying, even your example is not what all people across the board always feel.

Click to expand...

Didn't mean to imply otherwise, only that his insistence on the exact order doesn't always work that way in reality. Or in the story, as the examples you found show.

Have I missed it in the article where he said otherwise was true?

Click to expand...

He didn't come out and say it, as such, but I got the strong impression that he was at least implying that a single scene was always either a Scene or a Sequel. I think if I'd been a newbie writer, that's the idea I would've walked away with.

Anyway, as I said, the basic principles are sound, but there's more flexibility in application than he appears to allow. But then, he is, or was, a physicist, so I'm not surprised he appears to think the formula can't be tinkered with.

BethS said:

Anyway, as I said, the basic principles are sound, but there's more flexibility in application than he appears to allow. But then, he is, or was, a physicist, so I'm not surprised he appears to think the formula can't be tinkered with.

Click to expand...

Yeah, I think you got him dead to rights there. The article does come off sounding like it's fairly strict.

Good thing we know better!

amyall said:

I like this advice in particular. I've done something similar with a few of mine and it's worked incredibly well. I found that it helps me invent a better space for the action that's happening. It seems easier to build in landscape obstacles and realistic locations when I draw out what's happening.

In addition to all the great advice being given I'd also suggest getting close to what you're trying to write. Perhaps attend a paintball match to watch how the players move, shoot and talk to each other. If you've got a martial art club near you, sit in on a class or just go and watch from the chairs.


Best of luck!!
-A

Click to expand...

Oh yeah. I think very visually and spatially in these cases. Emotionally? I'm all words. Action and movement? I need visuals. I think it comes from my days playing D&D.

I love the idea of watching a paintball match! Or even participating. I need to think about doing that.

GigiF said:

I had a similar problem a few weeks ago and managed to find some great advice online here:
http://www.storyhack.com/wp-content/uploads/2007/04/howtowriteafightscene.pdf

To add a bit of my own advice - I choreographed out the minute by minute action sequence as bullet points like this:

- Char1 does this
- Char 2 does that
- Char 3 does something else
- Char1 says this
- Char 3 does this
- Etc etc.

I put little to no narrative detail only the actions as they happened.

This helped me as I could see the flow of the sequence from beginning to end.

I then used that flow to write the full narrative description.

Hope that helps.

Good luck!

Click to expand...

Nice! I like this thought! I always struggle with writing action myself, and I plan to give this a try!

Scenes and Sequels written by Jim Butcher is another good discussion on the flow in scenes and how to approach action.