Scenes from a hat!

Chris P

Likes metaphors mixed, not stirred
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3. You watch the stock ticker and think CHN, SLV, and KNY are countries.
 

archerjoe

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1. The celebrity spokesperson would never use this product except under extreme duress.
 

Robbert

Practical experience FTW
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2. That the production of your eco-friendly new car amassed five metric tons of waste; that 150 cubic metres of water were used to built it whilst it still cannot be fully recycled.
 

The_Riskbreaker

knows bears make everything worse
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3. "Anthony Sullivan here for the Pleasure Pack, a set of three inflatable rafts for ultimate family fun. Call now, and we'll double your order. Yes, that's right. Two sets of rafts that cost us a buck each to make, and you'll pay only $19.95 plus exorbint shipping and handling! What are you waiting for? Give us a call!"
 

calieber

Couth barbarian
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4. Your dog eat its own poo and doesn't care what the stuff looks like.
 

Lavern08

Sit Down, and Shut Up!
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5. This medicine will probably kill you, but at least it'll cure your insomnia.


Back-to-School TV commercials you'd love to see:
 

Kaiser-Kun

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1. Are you man enough for algebra? Because Mrs. Terwilliger is back- and this time, it's personal.
 

iLion

Why do I say these things?
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2. Target is having it's annual "No-Way Sale" where no-way is anything actually on sale!!

Because let's face it, Mom... you'll pay anything to get the little darlings back to school where they belong!!
 

Kaiser-Kun

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3. Pay the inscription early and we'll lend you the remote for your kids' electric collar!
 

Kaiser-Kun

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5. Our new bus has exo-steel bars. Not even a bear could go through. Our new fence features 80,000 volts. Excessive? Not for your hellions.

Bring your children to school today! Many go into Math 101... yet no one ever leaves.



Worst candidate cities to host the Olympic Games
 

archerjoe

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2. Geez, Mrs. Boss!!! Are you feeling OK? Do you need a ride to the hospital?
 

PEBKAC2

Will crit for food.
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4. I don't suppose I could borrow a pair of...well, not that I'd return them...I mean you wouldn't want them back after...oh never mind. Can somebody pass the beans, please.
 

Robbert

Practical experience FTW
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1. Do you want me to put you on a leash tonight?