I hope this isn't terribly confusing that I reply after T. Trian. We do have different avatars and names. We are also two different people who, yes, share some opinions, but also disagree on some issues, and have different brains too (though some may argue whether we have brains at all).
A Filipina friend of mine is part Japanese, so her skin tone is lighter than her friends', and she's told me she's considered more beautiful in her community than many other girls. In my wedding a relative marveled at my skin too, how pale it was even at the end of summer when people are usually tanned. While she's a great person, I found it somewhat odd a comment.
@ Mr. Flibble: Somewhere in the interwebz there's a picture of a wide-eyed, white owl who's itching to be attached after your post, but... I won't test my luck. I get what you are saying, but in order to speak about this, the interlocutors kind of have to judge the people by their looks, map out their assumptions and thoughts (and they remain treated as such instead of truths). I think one canjudge estimate people by their looks to a degree, one can draw conclusions though they may here and there be inaccurate. Most people do it all the time (if you're completely free of it, good for you), think of the very skinny girl "oh I wonder if she's sick. She sure looks that way!" That was also what we did on the uni course when we talked about the functionality aspect. You have to generalize in order to have that conversation. But let's not have that conversation, it's not going well, so I'd rather just move on. (I'm sorry if I came off judgmental) Especially because you said something to really make my blood boil:
And you say he should answer and not me? Who are you to say what public discussions I can comment and what I can't? If it was the "afaik" that I used that threw you off, that was my blunder, should've used 'as far as I've understood this.' Sorry.
P.S. all bolding added.
Anita Desai's novels have sometimes discussed this skin-color aspect with women, and how it doesn't seem to affect men's standing in the society at all. There was also a time in Europe when darker, tanned skin was considered unattractive by the nobles, while the better folk were as pale as death.Sad to say, but the idea of whiter skin has been prevalent before white people arrived in Asia.
This is also true in Indian literature/culture too.
I'd venture to say that this depends on the culture. Haven't encountered this in Scandinavia much when speaking about people with Scandinavian roots. I'm not sure if this really limits to men only.I think this goes to show that men when in the dominant position in society have been dictating physical traits as personality traits for a long, long time, no matter what the culture they come from. Maybe this is the core problem. I still hear it from men. They think a physical feature means some kind of personality trait.
A Filipina friend of mine is part Japanese, so her skin tone is lighter than her friends', and she's told me she's considered more beautiful in her community than many other girls. In my wedding a relative marveled at my skin too, how pale it was even at the end of summer when people are usually tanned. While she's a great person, I found it somewhat odd a comment.
@ Mr. Flibble: Somewhere in the interwebz there's a picture of a wide-eyed, white owl who's itching to be attached after your post, but... I won't test my luck. I get what you are saying, but in order to speak about this, the interlocutors kind of have to judge the people by their looks, map out their assumptions and thoughts (and they remain treated as such instead of truths). I think one can
Yeah, feels like I'm some kind of an extension to my husband, instead of a person of my own. Very Victorian.Ok. I went by what he actually said. (and he should answer, not you.) Nt what he meant - though I will grant that perhaps it was phrased badly in which case HE should come and clarify, not send you.
And you say he should answer and not me? Who are you to say what public discussions I can comment and what I can't? If it was the "afaik" that I used that threw you off, that was my blunder, should've used 'as far as I've understood this.' Sorry.
P.S. all bolding added.
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