Drive-thru funeral visitation

MacAllister said:

You people make me cringe, sometimes.

But in that good way.

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We laugh in the face of death! Mwahahaha! *cough cough * *grabs chest* *gasps* *wheezes*

And here I held my tongue instead of blurting out "You want fries with that?"

Why not have a wake wagon?

Sort of a cross between a hearse and a Mr Whippy ice cream truck. It could do the rounds of the different mourners' houses and it could even chime the Dies Irae instead of Greensleeves.

The coffin could pop up on a kind of tilt tray whilst the undertaker serves ice cream and booze.

This is the reception I got when I said we really need to have refreshments at our viewings I just meant that hours with no sustenance was something you never see in a good Southern gathering, so wouldn't it be polite at that kind? No, it's the tackiest thing ever, apparently

I can actually see reasons why this is a good idea (the disabled folks he mentioned). But like I said, I want my coffee at a wake, too. And more chairs, darnit! We always have like four. Wtf?

eta: Actually, at the last funeral I went to, the funeral home guys discretely handed out bottled water with custom labels for the funeral home on them. Because that's not tacky at all

I'll tell you, my father-in-law's funeral put me right off the whole idea. The evening of the viewing, some weird barometric pressure drop pulled a sudden, strange weather change into the air. Condensation was trickling and pooling on his face and hands and I was just about done with viewings forever.

Perks said:

I'll tell you, my father-in-law's funeral put me right off the whole idea. The evening of the viewing, some weird barometric pressure drop pulled a sudden, strange weather change into the air. Condensation was trickling and pooling on his face and hands and I was just about done with viewings forever.

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Aack!

My mom was traumatized as a youth over viewings. Back in her day, they were at people's houses and things. Gross things. Things I don't even want to think about.

No air conditioning back then. I guess a tacky ad on water bottles doesn't quite stack up

CassandraW said:

Why not have a live feed of the body on the funeral home's website? You could do memorial contributions by credit card. That way, you could...er..."pay your last respects" while in your underwear, from the comfort of your own home.

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Actually, that's not a bad idea. I'm thinking about folks who can't leave their home, they're in the hospital, or they have a job they just can't leave.

Snowstorm said:

Actually, that's not a bad idea. I'm thinking about folks who can't leave their home, they're in the hospital, or they have a job they just can't leave.

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Dear lord, people will still be trying to Skype me after I'm dead?

Oh well, better than a phone call at least.

Personally, I think viewings are tacky in general. I don't need to see someone's dead body to mourn them, to show my sympathy to their family for their passing. And I really don't like the whole embalming and primping deal that goes along with the viewing.

All that said, I think funerals and especially wakes are becoming passe. Perhaps it's because we're just too "busy," or perhaps it's because people are just living so much longer, but either way I've noted a huge drop off in funeral processions and I'm pretty sure the funeral home business is on the decline in general (no doubt it will pick up again when all the baby boomers start to really die off )

robeiae said:

(no doubt it will pick up again when all the baby boomers start to really die off )

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Millenial: we're still angry with you!

A number of my family members, who are so seldom right about anything, are utterly convinced I'm gonna burn after death. My parting gift to them is to make it so.

Also, there will be no viewing. But there will be a catered party afterward. You're all invited.

robeiae said:

Personally, I think viewings are tacky in general. I don't need to see someone's dead body to mourn them, to show my sympathy to their family for their passing. And I really don't like the whole embalming and primping deal that goes along with the viewing.

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I don't get it either.

kuwisdelu said:

Dear lord, people will still be trying to Skype me after I'm dead?

Oh well, better than a phone call at least.

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"Why won't kuwisdelu answer the phone? Where is that young'un?"

Later, "Oh..."

I can tell you that you'll get junk mail for years after you die. And if you have a land line that isn't disconnected, you'll also get telemarketing calls.

BTW, if you tell the telemarketers your loved one is dead, they sometimes will just continue with the canned speech. I'm not sure if this is part of their training, or it's just habit to continue selling until someone hangs up.

Actually, most of the telemarketers are also dead.

That explains a great deal.

robeiae said:

Personally, I think viewings are tacky in general. I don't need to see someone's dead body to mourn them, to show my sympathy to their family for their passing.

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I'm with you, but I've spoken to a lot of people who valued seeing the deceased and say it really helped their grieving process. I've given my husband a couple of preferences but told him to do whatever works best for him (and I don't think you always know until you're in the moment).

I've buried both parents and both sisters, all of whom wanted the traditional viewing and funeral. I would love never to attend one of those again. I do think you're right that as a society we're moving away from that being the default. When my father-in-law died, he was cremated almost right off without a viewing, then we had a memorial service and a gathering that really was a celebration of his life. I'm seeing that kind of thing more and more.

Snowstorm said:

"Why won't kuwisdelu answer the phone? Where is that young'un?"

Later, "Oh..."

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I didn't answer unknown numbers even when I was alive.

Lyv said:

I'm with you, but I've spoken to a lot of people who valued seeing the deceased and say it really helped their grieving process. I've given my husband a couple of preferences but told him to do whatever works best for him (and I don't think you always know until you're in the moment).

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If anyone wants to embalm me, it'll be over my dead body.

kuwisdelu said:

If anyone wants to embalm me, it'll be over my dead body.

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Exactly.

But all seriousness aside for a minute, this is a fascinating, regularly updated blog written by a youngish funeral director. It tells both the good and the bad, and provides the kind of details a lot of people would rather not know about. Except we're writers. Yes?

Ari Meermans said:

A number of my family members, who are so seldom right about anything, are utterly convinced I'm gonna burn after death. My parting gift to them is to make it so.

Also, there will be no viewing. But there will be a catered party afterward. You're all invited.

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Ah, I've always favored the idea of a funeral pyre, a floating one, you know, like Vikings or somebody did? Put me on the boat on top of firewood, with finery around me, set it ablaze, and everyone while it wends its way down the current.

I hate viewings, especially ones where I'm expected to hang around with the dead body for hours. Three minutes is more than enough time.

Funerals, sure. There are speeches and music and they're generally followed by food. Those are fine, but viewings? Ugh. Standing around, accepting whispered condolences from people you don't even know.

I don't attend them if I can avoid it, and I won't have one when I go. No way I'm doing that to my kids.