Third Great Purgy Mash-Up

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Blondchen

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Hello Purglettes! Here's the thread where I'll be posting the mash-ups starting tomorrow. The idea is to comment on the two different authors, what they did, how they viewed the material, your thoughts on the plot, style, whatever; and then take a guess as to who the two authors were.

Now, for those of you who have NO IDEA what I am talking about, The Purgy Mash-Up involves writers submitting excerpts of their work which is then anonymously extended by another participant.

THIS YEAR'S PARTICIPANTS (in no particular order):

Clovia
Melia
Happy Camper
Callalily
Tasmin
Firedrake
Alias Octavia
Just Me
Jy'lenn
Lara
Teriann
Sunna
Shveta
Inkwench
Blondchen
Hope101
Jenwriter
Houndrat
 

CACTUSWENDY

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Just a thought. IMHO too.....

If you are not careful this could turn into an author bashing area and I don't think Mac will let that fly. To cite an author and his/her work and then give your thoughts/opinions has been done on similar threads always ends up with some pretty bad things getting said.

Again, this is just my two cents. You might want to set some guidelines before you get this going. Good luck.
 

Blondchen

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Thanks, Wendy. This is actually the third time we've done the Mash-Up and so far, nothing but love and warm fuzzies. This is not a critique, merely a fun way to see how other writers view your excerpts without set up or explanation, and for everyone else to guess at whose style is whose, etc. etc. so forth and etc.
 

houndrat

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Thanks, Wendy. This is actually the third time we've done the Mash-Up and so far, nothing but love and warm fuzzies. This is not a critique, merely a fun way to see how other writers view your excerpts without set up or explanation, and for everyone else to guess at whose style is whose, etc. etc. so forth and etc.

Yeah, cuz Purgies are da 'bomb! Lol. I think Wendy is confusing our sweet little thread with SYW..... :)
 

Tasmin21

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*sets up camp, complete with barbecue grill and cooler full of mead* Ok, I'm ready. Where's Blondchen?
 

HappyCamper

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*Sigh* It's past my bedtime so will have to wait till morning before dropping by the campsite gain. Have fun and save me some mead. Will pour it in my coffee tomorrow morning after I slather some mash-up over my toast. Night all!
 

Blondchen

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Mash-Up #1

I eased myself in and stopped for a moment to allow my eyes to adjust to the new darkness. As I scanned the area, I made out the corner of a desk and file cabinet. A hint of light from setting dusk streamed through a small sliver of space in the window blind, casting light onto one tiny spot of the room. I blinked, trying to adjust my eyes further when I noticed papers sprinkled haphazardly about the floor. Not a very good filing system.

“Anyone here?” I asked again.

I stepped over a couple of the papers and inched further into the space. Being in his office, in the almost dark, didn’t feel right. I couldn’t quite put my finger on it, but something was off. Nerves settled in the pit of my stomach. A faint rustling noise caught my attention and I froze. I held my breath and listened. Did the noise come from the hall? A mouse or a person? What the hell was I doing in there? I decided to put the note on the desk and get out. When I glanced at the lit corner once again, I discovered it—a hand draped limply on top of the desk. I couldn’t distinguish the whole body attached to it, but it was there, a shadowy lump.

“Who’s there?”

My heart raced as I inched my way toward the huge desk and spotted the silhouette of a man slumped over in the tall leather chair. My hand flew to my mouth as I gasped. I felt the blood rush out of my face and my stomach turn. I knew I shouldn’t have come here. Papers littered the desk just as they did the floor and other items rested in a disorganized state.

###

“Shit.” This was the last thing I needed after the day I had. It was bad enough that the engine in my car had seized up, that I was two hours late for work, that the boss was in a foul mood. Now, to top it all off, the icing on the stinking, rotten cake, there was a body slumped over Mike’s desk.

I could no longer just drop the note and run. Paper whispered beneath my feet and, sure as hell, my shoe print would be there for all to see.

“Shit, shit, shit.” I put the note back in my pocket. If it was Mike, he wouldn’t be in a fit state to read what I had to say anyway…especially if he was dead. Everything I was too gutless to say to his face was, suddenly, meaningless.

I crept closer and reached for the lamp. I couldn’t just stand there if someone was hurt or dead, especially if it was Mike. My hands still shook when I groped for the switch. Suddenly, the office was flooded with soft, gold light. It spilled across the cluttered desk, found the blood splattered across the mess of papers, envelopes, spilled coffee.

“Oh God.” I swear every one of my internal organs slid to my feet. “Mike?”I know you’re not supposed to disturb a crime scene but it was Mike, damn it, Mike. The lamplight was cruel, picking out the thin, black trickle of blood that trailed from his mouth to a little, scarlet pool on the blotter.

“Mike?”I reached for his wrist and, with trembling fingers, felt for his pulse. “Please, God, please let him be all right.”

The faintest flutter beneath my finger, a steady rhythm and my organs returned to their rightful place. “Thank God.”

I had no time to feel relief, the whisper I heard earlier became a distinct and ominous rustle.
 

jy'lenn

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omg! this was just gorgeous!!! have no clue who wrote either part, but... WOW!

*drops into camp chair and grabs a bag of popcorn... watches the guessing* :popcorn:
 

Tasmin21

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I'm not going to even pretend to guess, but I'm dying to know what happens next!

I have to say, in the original section, the protagonist/narrator sounds like they're in somewhere unfamiliar to them, while in the continuation, they sound more like they are more intimate with the surroundings. (being in a stranger's office, as opposed to being in the office of someone they obviously have considerable history with)

I have no idea what this means, just babbling. Ignore me.
 

alias octavia

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Very interesting mash-up here. There is a different tone between the two pieces, I agree Tas. They both capture a certain kind of horror in different ways. I'm not ready to make a guess just, but I loved this description:

"The lamplight was cruel, picking out the thin, black trickle of blood that trailed from his mouth to a little, scarlet pool on the blotter."

Creepy.
 

jy'lenn

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ditto on what you two said about the pieces being written by two different people. I admit to not wanting to say that..... both are definitely creepy and a lot of fun to read!

i'll take a stab in the dark and say one was written by ink.

yeah, I know I'm wrong... but someone's gotta start the guessing, right?
 

ink wench

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Ooh, we started? Agreeing with Tas and Octavia. The pieces have a very different feel to them.

I have no idea who wrote either one, but for the hell of it I'll just guess that Houndrat wrote the second because she was going nuts with ellipses over the weekend... and there's ellipses in part 2 :D
 

JenWriter

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Hmm. I'm going to guess Ink on the first one! And...Houndrat on the second.

Loved both the pieces. Both creepy, but in different ways. I think the second one had more of a smartass voice to it, which I love. Great job to both the writers!
 

sunna

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Woohoo, Mash-up time!! :snoopy:

I'm going for stab-in-the-dark guessing this time, since organized Spreadsheet Of Doom mode did me very little good last time. So I will agree w/ everyone else that the styles are different styles. They're both very cool pieces; scary in different ways. Great job!

Stab 1: Lily?

Stab 2: Fire?
 

houndrat

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Wow, I *heart* everyone who guessed me for the second one! I actually did a double-take when I read the first one...that voice is totally my style.

I'm guessing Blond for the first one, just because it's got a smartass voice and she was going to write about an office.

I was going to guess Tas for the second one, but I guess not since she commented on it...

hmmm...

And yes, I loves my ellipses. But I don't tend to use them a ton when I actually write novels, for whatever reason! :)
 
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houndrat

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Okay, so I'm going with Ink on the second one...

And I forgot to say, I loved both of those! Tension and humor--two of my favorite things!

Loved this line from the second one: If it was Mike, he wouldn’t be in a fit state to read what I had to say anyway

And from the first one: Not a very good filing system.

:)
 

Haupe

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Not a very good filing system.

a shadowy lump.

###

Everything I was too gutless to say to his face was, suddenly, meaningless.


I swear every one of my internal organs slid to my feet.

Both fantastic, but I agree with very different tones. I highlighted my favorite bits of both above.

As for who? I'm going with Teriann for the first one, Blond for the second.
 

Tasmin21

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I was going to guess Tas for the second one, but I guess not since she commented on it...

I was seriously thinking "Wow, that sounds like me!" *snicker*
 
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