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How to Critique Bad Writing By Claire Armstrong "Can you review my work?" The request that can send shivers down any aspiring writer's back. Perhaps you're a member of an online creative writing club, or-- even worse-- one that meets face to face. The request is coming from a very friendly wannabe writer with bags of enthusiasm-- and no discernible talent. You agree to read it, but your suspicion is confirmed when you take a look at the short story, poem or novel. The characters are so wooden you're expecting them to grow leaves, the plot is full of holes, or he's rhymed "funny" with "money" and (gasp) "runny." You desperately search for redeeming features and manage to find one or two. Maybe the spelling isn't too bad, or there are a few funny bits-- even if you're not sure whether you are supposed to laugh. What do you do? After all, you've agreed to read it and share your thoughts, even though now you're beginning to regret saying so. Do you give him the brutal truth, telling yourself that the Simon Cowell approach is fairer to him in the long run? Or do you swallow your principles of honesty and tell the would-be writer that you loved it? Perhaps something makes the situation even worse. So bad you can't face telling the truth. He hasn't just asked you to review any old piece of work; it's one that really means something to him. His poem is about his dead cat, the short story is loosely based on his real wedding day, or his novel tackles a major worldwide catastrophe. Not only would you be stamping on his dreams as a writer, you would also be trashing his life itself. It's a particularly awkward situation. I know-- I've been there. But it's important to remember that writing-- like any other craft-- takes time to learn. Maybe he's not Margaret Atwood or William Faulkner, but perhaps he doesn't expect to be, just yet. I wrestled with my conscience when a fellow member of an online writing club asked me to take a look at her work. I read it, and didn't know how to tell her it looked like it had been written by a 12-year-old. Then I found out the reason why-- she was 12. I thanked my lucky stars that I hadn't decided to pick her work apart-- she might never have written again. So remember, everyone has to start somewhere, and being pointed in the right direction at the right time can be just the help a budding writer needs. If you really want to help writers improve, take a part of their work that just didn't do it for you and explain why, but also point out a part that you think worked better. You might suspect that some people are beyond help, but they've taken the biggest step towards improving: they've asked for your advice. Recommend some of your favorite authors for them to read and be inspired by. Share some writing advice that someone has given you. Hell, even tell them to buy a dictionary-- if it would help them avoid the clangers that litter their work. I remember the first time someone gave me advice. I was 13, perhaps, and had handed my English teacher the first few chapters of a story. I was very excited about the prospect of her coming back to me saying I was some kind of child prodigy. To her credit, she managed to phrase her response ever so carefully. "Once," she said, "I managed to find a very early story by one of my favorite
writers-- and I found that I couldn't read it, it was so awful. But she got
better, she learned how to write beautifully-- and I think you will too." Claire Armstrong is a freelance writer based in the UK and is always happy to accept commissions: clairejarmstrong@hotmail.com
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