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Group
Scenes I
have read more than thirty scripts from aspiring screenwriters, and have noticed
that many are in a mad-rush to get through a group scene.
Given the countless articles on brevity in screenwriting, I can see why
writers are afraid to devote more than three sentences to description.
The screenwriting gurus tell us, "Don't over-describe."
"Let the art director choose what belongs in a scene."
"Screenwriting is action." "Screenplays are not
novels." "We need to see
lots of white space on the page." Blah,
blah, blah. Now,
I'm for brevity as much as the next guy, but not at the expense of losing a feel
for what's going on. Yes, it's a
tight rope we all need to walk. When
is description too much description? When
do we need to see a smile, a glare? When
does the dialogue say it all? Do we
need to know what the living room looks like?
What every person in the group is doing?
How they are reacting? Reason
tells us we do not need to know the color of a character's tie, but we may need
to know if he's wearing a suit, or a pull-over, or pajamas.
We need to SEE the characters as well as the setting. What types of characters are there? Are there buildings?
What type? Is it raining?
Is it winter? In short, readers need to see the scene in their heads, or
else-- there's no drama, no good writing, no six-figure sale!
SETTING A
group scene will not be as effective if the reader has no visual image of the
scene's location, or WHAT PEOPLE ARE DOING.
If there is a street demonstration, what do the individual demonstrators
look like, what are they yelling? Are
they holding signs? What do they
say? Are there policemen nearby?
Is there dissension among the ranks?
Though it's cold outside, is there a mother holding a newborn, risking
its health? In other words,
SHOW US WHY the scene is important. There
are also specific sounds inherent to different locales (car horns, gossip,
loudspeakers, cheering, etc.). Can
any of these sounds add vitality to an otherwise ordinary scene? NON-LEAD
CHARACTERS Scenes
such as the above demonstration often involve groups of "non-lead"
characters. When their group drama
is broken down into a series of individual dramas, the plight of the each
character becomes more personal, more engaging.
For instance, in a film such as "Schindler's List", there is a
scene in which the Jews race after the trucks carrying their children away.
The focus of the action moves from the group to the individual woman, a
young mother. A look of profound
horror on her, she screams, grabs at the children's hands as they wave goodbye,
and the truck speeds away. She is
no longer one person in a sea of faces. She
is an individual, and her horror becomes ours. Can
you think of any way to "individualize" a group scene with non-lead
characters? "Titanic"
also handles its masses well, intercutting the actions of the lead characters to
those of non-leads. Often the
non-lead is an example of what not to do, or where not to go.
But always, the non-leads are portrayed as humans that want the same
things as the leads. A brief
description of their appearance may instill in them some humanity that otherwise
would be lost. Can
you briefly give the reader a visual image of a non-lead character? INTERPLAY Often,
lead characters are in the midst of a large group.
They may be at a ball game, or on the subway, or a million other places.
And though the action may exist only between these lead characters, it is
important not to forget a group is also present.
Keep in mind what the members of the group are doing at all times.
Should they come into contact with the lead characters?
If there is a party, are there too many guests for the room's size?
Is there dancing? Pushing and shoving?
Would it make sense for the lead character (that wants to talk to his
attractive co-star) to "take her arm, gently pull her away from a
particularly nosy old woman"? Could
this interplay with a supporting character add something to the scene?
Or maybe he can walk by the barbecue, where the host hands him a tray of
hot dogs. The lead then tries to
compliment his beautiful co-star as party-guests approach, and grab at the hot
dogs. Would
interplay with non-leads add anything to your scene? LEAD
CHARACTER'S MOTIVES When
groups of lead characters come together, sometimes it's easy to overlook the
fact that each character has MOTIVES. And
when you're talking about writing a group scene, problems arise exponentially. It's very difficult to keep many characters and their motives
straight in your mind. The task of
"spinning the plates" while writing a good group scene can be a
daunting one. I find it very useful to place myself in the shoes of EVERY
character in a given scene. Would
someone speak up? Keep quiet?
Interrupt an admission? Get
angry? Perceive another character's
guilt? If I were the character,
what would I do? Characters
should be permitted to say what they naturally would say, do what they must do--
even if it's messy-- even if two characters speak simultaneously, cut each other
off, or walk away. Visualize
your scene. Are all the lead
characters actively pursuing their goals? GROUP
ACTION Motive
leads to action, and sometimes the simultaneous actions of different group
members can be hard to orchestrate. That
is why it is imperative to know where each character is at all times.
Sometimes the task is not that difficult, when characters are in very
static locations (e.g., sitting in a car, at a round poker table, standing in an
elevator). But sometimes characters are ubiquitous, fighting, dancing,
or running in and out of the room. In
these cases, it may be advantageous for a writer to draw a picture of the scene,
or play-act a fight with friends. Believe
me, you will surprise yourself with the absurd actions you have written in some
of your scenes. And
while there are some actions one has planned before writing a script, other
actions could arise from a better knowledge of location and props.
It's one thing to write at a computer, it's another to visit a location,
see what items are readily available to a visitor.
If an angry bride needs to throw something at the groom, she has her
bouquet, she can grab the Reverend's book of sermons, or she can grab an incense
censor, and swing it hard into the groom's kneecap.
(I'm certain Jackie Chan doesn't write his fight scenes on a computer). REACTION Sometimes
a group scene is interesting because of its character's REACTIONS. Races, athletic contests, shoot-outs, unveilings, etc. rely
on the action of the lead character and the reactions of others.
Through these reactions, we learn how each character feels about the
hero. For example, the hero wins
the race. His parents smile
proudly. His competitor stomps
angrily. The townspeople cheer, his
ex-girlfriend weeps. His friends
high-five each other. * I
guess it's one thing creating an outline for a screenplay and punching out a
story. It's quite another imagining your screenplay as a
three-dimensional film, chock full of possibilities. On a page, if a character stays silent, we follow the printed
dialogue and pass by the omission. On
screen, we see the character standing idly by.
And the scene becomes unbelievable.
On the page, a fight scene may make logistical sense, but may seem
totally fake when we actually see it. Or,
we may see the hero pass by a discarded weapon when battling the dragon, because
the screenwriter forgot it was dropped there.
It
all comes down to visualization. Visualizing
the settings, your characters, their actions, and conveying enough detail to
your readers, thus enabling them to "see" the drama in their minds is
a crucial part of screenwriting. I
have read scripts where the police drag a lead character to the gallows for
execution. Meanwhile, "people
stand" or "policemen watch," or "demonstrators yell."
No more description than that. I have read scripts that display a slug
line, then forge right into the action, leaving me no clue as to what the scene
is like. It
could be that these writers were unimaginative or they were faithful followers
of the brevity gurus. My two
cents-- if you need five sentences to adequately describe a scene and its
characters, use five. So maybe your
script will be two pages longer. I
think it's worth it. If you'd like
to use a line to describe a non-lead character, do it.
I applaud you. If the drama
you have created engages your readers, I'm sure they will not mind. LEON KAYE has one
full-length published stageplay and a few published shorts. His agent is ELAINE
DEVLIN (NY). He has placed in a few script and stageplay contests, and has
received public readings.
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