Absolute Write - Back to home

Subscribe to the Absolute Write Newsletter and get

 the Agents! Agents! Agents! report free! Click here.

 

 Win a 1-year subscription to Writer's Digest by subscribing to Absolute Markets-- all paying markets for your writing. Click here.

 

Memos From The Edge: Rantings of a Mad Screenwriter

Part Three - Help!  I've fallen and I can't get up!

Hollywood is the only town where you cannot fail. You can only quit trying.
~ Dennis Foley

November 13, 1996

Lastlane Apts, Los Angeles, CA

Sent by mail to Sonny Zenwicki from Landyn Parker

Dear Sonny,

No, I'm not dead but I should be.

I hate actors. I hate agents. I hate studios. All producers must be killed before they rewrite again. Pure anarchy. That's what I'm looking forward to. If I had the guts I'd get a really big gun and clean this town up.

Instead I'll be hanging out at Starbucks. Sipping espresso. Passing the days of my miserable existence waiting to catch a glimpse of the rich and famous.

I'm nothing. No, I'm less than nothing. I'm a screenwriter. No, no, worse than that. I'm a has-been hack of a screenwriter.

If my life were a movie, right about now, Arnold Schwartzeneger would burst in and blow my brains across the room but then I probably couldn't even get Arnold to star in my pathetic little b-movie life. Man, I'll be lucky if I can even get Jean Claude Van Damme to kick box my sorry butt off some balcony just so I can splat sadly on the hot asphalt thirty stories down.

Yeah that's me all right - a splat on the pavement of life.

As you may have guessed by now, that whole deal I told you about before fell through. Creative difference you might say.

Denny-Dean hooked up with Dirk Dunsten and now my ferret-faced ex-assistant is writing and co-exec-producing the picture.

%$#@*&%$!!!!

I even lost my waitering job. But enough about me - how the hell are you?

Humbly yours,

Landyn Parker, esq.

 

Copyright © 1999 Larpi Inc.

Visit the Mad Screenwriter's website here: http://www.dvshop.ca/dvcafe/madscreen/navigate.htm 

Read Part One by clicking here, Part Two by clicking here, or Part Three by clicking here.

 

Google
 

Web
Absolute Classes
Absolute Write

Sponsored links

Ring binders

 

 

 

Make a Real Living as a Freelance Writer!

How to find a book publisher

 

Home

Text on this site Copyright © 1998-2007 Absolute Write, all rights reserved.
Please contact the authors if you'd like to reprint articles on this site.  All copyrights are retained by original authors.  And plagiarizers will be rounded up, handcuffed, and stuck into a very small and humid room wherein they must listen to Barney sing the "I Love You, You Love Me" song over and over again.

writers writing software